Alaric Prime

This article is about something that is considered by the overpowering majority of /tg/ to be fail. Expect huge amounts of derp and rage, punctuated by /tg/ extracting humor from it.

Leadership so incompetent it makes the High Lords look ingenious.

Alaric Prime is a Knight World of the Imperium known for its absolutely retarded levels of leadership.

Overview

The planet of Alaric Prime is as hidebound by tradition and protocol as any other Knight world, yet it also has to bear the further burden of several thousand years of careless lawmaking. No law upon Alaric Prime has ever been repealed which may sound odd at first, but believe me citizen, we are just dipping the toes of retarded. For example, it is illegal to yawn during daylight hours, illegal to talk when a Noble is speaking in earshot, and even illegal to point at the stars in the night sky. So numerous and stupid are the archaic laws of Alaric Prime that a full two-thirds of the planet's populace has been incarcerated or exiled by the over-zealous Justicars attached to each knightly house. One must wonder how any world is going to function with laws this pants-on-head retarded nor the fact that two-thirds of said population is unable to do anything productive because of said retarded laws. Grimderp strikes again!

Most of Alaric Prime's surface is covered in a viscous sulphuric solution far thicker than seawater. The main continent of Alaric Prime is paradoxically known as Sacred Isle, each island around it the domain of one of its knightly houses. The islands that form the rest of the habitable lands are little more than penitentiaries. Very few of those imprisoned are truly guilty of malicious conduct, but those that are criminal by nature inevitably thrive in the lawless proto-societies that result.

The planet was the site of a battle between Orks of the Red Waaagh! and the Wolf Lord Ragnar Blackmane's Great Company. Also Krom Dragongaze and his Wolf Guard suffered the painful defeat from the Orks here.

One must wonder when the Imperium would knock some sense on these idiots and update their nonsensical laws that would make an Arbites Judge facepalm in second-hand embarrassment. We get that the Imperium is largely pragmatic and have a 'hands-off' approach when it comes to domestic affairs, but when a world is this objectively stupid to the point of hemorrhaging potentially good labour, somewhere along the lines, skulls needs to be cracked. On the bright side of things, it seems that Robo Guilltyman's upcoming Codex Imperialis^TM book on good governance would sooner or later smash the face at these idiot rulers at full-Primarch levels of force once it is completed.

Tl;dr, this planet is what /tg/'s and TTS's depiction of the High Lords of Terra are, but CANON.