Roving Mauler
One of the stupidest looking monsters released in 3.5e (and possibly one of the stupidest of Dungeons & Dragons’ complete bestiary) is the Roving Mauler from 3.5e's Tome of Magic. And this is coming from a book that features a flock of birds and a bear made out of teeth. When either one is more fearsome than a lion monster, you know you got a problem; then again, the same book had introduced the Truenamer, so...
Description[edit]
Like all pact magic monsters, they resemble a specific Vestige. In this case, they "bear a disturbing resemblance to Buer" and posses some of the abilities she grants to her followers. Some binders in-universe think they were either her servants or some creature she had a connection to in life. Regardless, both Buer and Roving Maulers are based on Buer, the 10th demon of the Ars Goetia, and its depiction there at least justifies its bizarre-ass appearance here.
As you can see, the Roving Mauler is based off of a demon from the Lesser Key of Solomon (Buer, to be exact), and has a pair of lion’s heads (one on each side) with five separate legs sticking out like a star. Standing five feet tall (or is this diameter?) and weighing 150 pounds, it looks like a lion pinwheel and is just as threatening. It also, apparently, has stripes that change with the season and records suggest that forest ones have green stripes. How do these stripes help with its tan fur? Who cares?
Much like the lions they live with (and wish they were), Roving Maulers hunt in prides, targeting caravans and campsites for their beasts of burden. Also like lions, they have keen eyesight and hearing and can track through smell though poorly. Unlike lions, they lack stealth (obviously) and "typically lounge in trees or rocky prominences" until something wanders close. Roving Maulers also have all around vision with their 4 eyes and great hearing, adding for a +4 to each skill. They are also great climbers with a +8 to climb checks, hence living in trees. They have powerful jaws but they won't be biting anyone anytime soon with their bodies.
In combat, Maulers prefer to constantly roll around, using their “Tumbling Attack” to deal damage. Taking a full round action, the Roving Mauler rolls 40 feet, using one claw attack on any creature it rolls over (think of the Skeleton Wheels from Dark Souls). The targeted creature, however, can use an attack of opportunity against it with a -4 penalty. If the lion succeeds it DC 25 “Tumble” check the attack of opportunity is negated. If their prey gives a good fight, the monsters roll away to quickly heal and return to attack their weakened prey.