Orcs & Goblins

This article is a stub. You can help 1d4chan by expanding it

FOREWARD: This article will be translated into Orcish by volunteer greenskins.

The Warhammer Fantasy equivalent to the Orks of the OTHER Warhammer.

On Orcyness

Generally speaking, the Orcs & Goblins army is made up of a species with mysterious origins called "greenskins" in slang terms by players, Games Workshop, and many in-universe races. The race generally speaks in a Cockney (a type of British accent (yes the lime-men come in different types). It's supposed to sound sorta like this ) accent. They incorporate things from football (soccer) hooligans as well, since during the time that Warhammer was first created there was something of social unrest as soccer matches often devolved into (very) violent riodxsfgafadfafwfts. Just as soccer fans are prone to strange practices like wearing specific clothing the day their team plays to assigning particular meanings to colors and designs, Orcs follow suit. Any time Orcs get lines of speech, their words are spelled in heavy-handed parodies of their accent. They are prone to renaming things, like spears being "STABBAZ" or Dwarfs being "STUNTIEZ".

Like in 40k, most varieties of greenskins are a type of hyper-evolved hairless ape-like fungus (as strange as that sounds). Unlike 40k, Fantasy greenskins are far more diverse in origin, some even being capable of sexual reproduction (maybe). Also unlike 40k, where the greenskins are pretty much just Orks and their goblin-like diminutive expendable servants called Grots, Fantasy greenskins consist of an extraordinary variety of different types based on region of origin and role in the greater group with the smaller Goblins having equal importance to the bigger Orcs. The army also consists of Giants, Trolls, Squigs, Dire Wolves, Dire Boars, and pretty much anything else greenskins can goad into battle and in earlier editions had savage Humans and Half-Orcs as well. Going beyond the tabletop, mercenaries from other races such as humans and Ogres may find themselves marching with more intelligent groups of Orcs and Goblins. Greenskins are, along with humans, particularly susceptible to Undeath. Just about anything you can think of to put in would work in fluff, as the army books continually state that greenskins are a very diverse group. Greenskins usually congregate into groups called "mobs" lead by a "Boss" or "Warboss" (although there's no unified term). Orc chain of command is usually established passively by size, and when size is close then by physical combat or more trivial ways such as yelling louder than the other greenskin. Goblins tend to be more intelligent, and establish the pecking order through convincing others of their importance, usually just by being the goblin capable of telling the biggest lie and getting others to believe it. Mobs organize themselves further into tribes, and at the largest level (invariably one on the march to war) a "WAAAGH!". Greenskins (possibly) breed by releasing spores upon death, which permeate the ground. Most are born with a rudimentary level of knowledge, with larger varieties rarely learning more than what they began with.

We'z da down to Earff boyz, not loik dem gitz in spess. Da humiez, stuntiez, and pointy 'eadz calls us "greenskinz". Deyz can all zog off.

We'z not all just Orcs an' Gubbinz though. Sometimes we get'z biggunz, and trollz to stop muckin' about an krump some gitz wiff us. Oh, an every proppa' boy haz his own Squig. Some boyz got a fing for findin' animals dat can foight, an hitchin' em to wheelz to get into da foight fastah'. Dat's smart finkin', ammright?

So da Boss of da greenskinz's is da Boss. Bosses ain't always called Bosses, sometimes gitz call dem other fings'. But dat's dumb. Bosses are da' biggest and bestest in da group, and da biggest and bestest alwayz' end up leadin' a big enuff group an' lead a WAAAGH! against who needz' a good WAAAGH!in'!

So'z when we'z get krumped, lil'unz' pop outta da' dirt. Dey'z dumb as Ogrez, but give dem' a beatin' an dey get in loin' quick enuff.

The main drive in life for greenskins is to fight and die in spectacular ways. Greenskins may gather into a massive WAAAGH! to invade a human city, slaughter it's defenders, then disperse into infighting and eventually wander away in small bands without even entering the defenseless metropolis because there's no longer a fight to be had, and plenty of loot already on the field (to fight over). More intelligent varieties may see greater purpose in life, from Orcs who realize that gold has value or who witness a great sight such as a knight mounted on a dragon which they will seek to emulate, to Goblins who may dedicate themselves to the Chaos Gods or decide to entirely wipe out a group which has for as long as their tribe can remember kept their numbers low. Tribes that have been entirely wiped-out sometimes resurface, either because a story told by a Shaman inspires new greenskins to "join it", or because of the intervention of Gork and Mork, or maybe Mork and Gork. Simply obtaining looted gear belonging to an older tribe may inspire the new wielders to align themselves to it, leading to the same tribe existing in multiple places at once and having no knowledge of each other. Greenskins are not only willing to fight their own, many look forward to it. They tend towards xenophobia, and combined with their diverse physical forms leads to constant conflict. As previously stated, this is in their minds a good thing. When they do fight other groups, results are varied. Depictions of deities and figures are usually defaced, and remade into dedications to their local gods or the supreme gods of the greenskins Gork and Mork (or possible Mork and Gork). Some of these, through the magic of their race, animate. Things of value to them are looted, usually weapons and armor before things like gold and gems. Wood that can be re-purposed is taken to save time from chopping it. Conquered peoples fare different fates depending on numerous factors; sometimes winding up as slaves, beaten to work and dying at the boredom of their captors. Some are consumed as rations, men women and children alike. Some are ignored, since they provide no decent fight to be had and bothering with them would be a waste of time that could be spent marching to a fight.

Many players migrating from 40k may find greenskins to be less customizable than the 41st Millennium variant. While Orks are known to "loot" things from other races, like space ships and gear, and slap it together with shit (literally) and duct tape then simply mass-believe it into working until it does allowing players to buy what they want from other armies and Ork it up, Fantasy greenskins are less prone to the same level of extreme change. While it's certainly possible to take a chariot from the Tomb Kings and put a few shields on it and paint it red it never has quite the same effect as taking a Rhino and putting patches of welded metal along with a hydraulic arm on the side will. Ogres tend to be the more custom army. Greenskins tend to make their own gear, usually out of another race's but rarely will it still have the same look as it did originally (thus an Orc wearing an Empire helmet would be unusual, as they'd pound it to be more Orcy in most cases). That's not to say that greenskins aren't amazingly open to options. Quite the opposite, they have more tabletop options than any army in the vanilla game and represent the "jack of all trades" option for the Destruction (evil) armies with their opposite being The Empire. That's also not to say they aren't a modder's dream, as they within the fluff do loot and slap their own styles onto what they take or sometimes adopt strange behaviors unlike those seen before. But while in 40k one may find Orks making a flying Dukes of Hazzard car wearing metal cowboy hats, Orcs would probably be mostly sticking to more realistic medieval things (but of course anachronism isn't new to the setting either).

So da' point in loif' is to foight'. Ain't nothin' else to do. Anyfing else is muckin' about. You don't wanna be muckin' about, or yer Boss is liable to krump you. So keep yer feet goin' towards a fight, an' if da Boss says to loot you loot, an' if da Boss says to eat you eat, an' if da Boss says It's time to WAAAGH! den you'z in luck! Other races, dey foight' only when dey "got reason to". Don't look at me, I don't unda'stand it eiver. But we'z green! We'ze smart! We foight' 'cause foightin' iz what there iz to do!

Lil'unz dat come through da swirly magic holes from spess land whine dat dere' ain't enuff loot around. You do dis, you get krumped for bein' dumb. Hopefully in da hardest way possible. Dat alway'z givez us a good laugh.

Females and Hybrids?

Way back in the day before 40k cast it's grimdark shadow over Fantasy (in fact, long before 40k was even thought of) Warhammer Orcs were not only the biggest threat in the setting, but also had normal biology. Half-orcs existed in 1st edition Warhammer, and females were seen in artwork.

However, much like everything else it borrowed from Fantasy, the creation of 40k shat all over the Orcs and Goblins concept. After Goblins ("Grots") were relegated exclusively to the status of "bitch Orks", GW concocted a bullshit explanation for their endless numbers; that Orks are mono-gender. They are fungal rather than mammal (nipples exist because they are a created race rather than an evolved one), and where an Ork's dangly bits should be are instead a bloated sac full of spores which, upon death, burst releasing thousands of baby Orks into the ground (interestingly, this means the lack a penis and thus urinate like females). While it was mentioned in early 40k fluff in a large list of Ork mutations that "Femboyz" exist, they were never elaborated on nor mentioned again. Little else on the list that never received a model was either however

While it was never made legit canon in Warhammer Fantasy via an all-inclusive "Orcs and Goblins breed through spores only" style entry, GW nonetheless never mentioned Half-Orcs or Orc females again after 3rd edition (barring Blood Bowl cheerleaders). Night Goblins are mentioned to come from spores in a Black Library Skarsnik novel, although this can be explained by the strange anatomy and fungus obsession of the buggers as it is. In the ill-fated Warhammer Online game, Orc players begin their life emerging from a spore cave; but this game is non-canon and took many liberties with lore. Greenskin origins are suggested (but not confirmed) to be from spores brought accidently by Old Ones. But since it was never actually retconned or contradicted, some players use the fluff that at least some Orcs and Goblins are technically still mammals and thus have some females who breed sometimes with some humans. Somewhere. A reigning theory considering the shared fluff between Orcs and Orks is that Femboyz, a mutation of Orks that have feminine characteristics, become pregnant when the spores from a genderless Orc make contact with them (yeast infection conception in other words) while also being fertile to humans (being similar to Mass Effect Asari in this regard). This is purely speculation however. So called "Orcginas" are known for being skubtastic on /tg/ however. Much of the argument stems from two groups of purists; the first believing that the spore "Orkyness" makes Warhammer greenskins unique. The second argues against anything that came from Warhammer iiiiiiiiiiin spaaaaaace. Factor in accusation of Magical Realm and SJW and you have a comple disaster.

Uncharacteristically, Half Orcs are not described as pig-disgusting to humans and weak to greenskins. They simply exhibit traits of both, and have the Orcish/Norscan tendency to not get along with either. While they were described as being usually evil, Orcs back in the day were actually evil as well rather than being the fight-loving dimwits of today. As a result, when going with the assumption that they DO still exist, it's likely that they are simply barbarians uninterested in reading or magic rather than outright malevolent beings.

Anyone wishing to field half-orcs could simply hybridize Empire/Bretonnian bits with O&G bits. Female Orcs (Orc Girlz? Femboyz?) can be found in several ranges, notably Russian Alternative which produces models to use as proxies with Warhammer anyway. Female Goblins are rarer, as the specific look of Warhammer Goblins are rarely replicated elsewhere. Of course one can always just get creative with the Greenstuff...

Oi'm twalf an' wots dis? DAT GIT WUZ KRUMPED FOR DAT POST.

• 

  The original page referencing Half-Orcs.

• 

  Artwork from Blood Bowl depicting an Orcy cheerleader.

• 

  That same Orc's model.

• 

  RA's Orc Girlz.

History

Greenskins don't care about history. At best, they are entertained with tales of violence (particular emphasis on the onomatopoeias). Shamans who manage to work up illusion magic and form visuals are well-prized by the group.

Greenskins factor into the histories of most races in the world. Although their numbers used to be far less, they still managed to get WAAAGH!s "organized" and rile up the other races. Earliest firsthand knowledge comes from a Tomb King in the days before the collapse of the Warp Gates who spent much of his mortal life hunting them for his amusement and to keep their race from spilling into Nehekhara. Before that, it's known greenskins suddenly appeared while the Old Ones were creating the other races of the world without explanation as to their origins. The Lizardmen Saurus were immediately tasked to wipe them out (a task they failed at, and put on the backburner when the Gates collapsed and Daemons came into the world). It is unknown where they fit into the plan of the Chaos Gods and Old Ones, but their natural affinity for chaos surpassing Chaos assures that whatever plan they were meant for, they almost certainly are no longer on that path.

WAAAGH!!! HAHA!

Army

The greenskin army list is rather large, and may take some time to peruse.

Bitch, bitch, bitch, I'z sad I'z not muckin' about!

Characters

• Gorbad Ironclaw:

• Azhag the Slaughterer:

• Grimgor Ironhide: See Grimgor Ironhide.

• Wurrzag Da Great Green Prophet:

• Grom the Paunch of the Misty Mountain: See Grom the Paunch.

• Skarsnik, Warlord of the Eight Peaks:

• Gitilla Da Hunter:

• Snagla Grobspit:

Generic Characters

• Orc Warboss:

• Savage Orc Warboss:

• Black Orc Warboss:

• Goblin Warboss:

• Night Goblin Warboss:

• Orc Great Shaman:

• Savage Orc Great Shaman:

• Goblin Great Shaman:

• Night Goblin Great Shaman:

• Orc Big Boss:

• Savage Orc Big Boss:

• Black Orc Big Boss:

• Goblin Big Boss:

• Night Goblin Big Boss:

• Orc Shaman:

• Savage Orc Shaman:

• Goblin Shaman:

• Night Goblin Shaman:

Mounts

• Giant Spider:

• Giant Wolf:

• Gigantic Spider:

• Great Cave Squig:

• War Boar:

• Wyvern:

Core

• Orc Boyz:

• Orc Arrer Boyz:

• Savage Orcs:

While most Orc groups loot to their hearts content when they have the option to do so, and Black Orcs are capable of making new and exclusively Orcish gear, Savage Orcs refuse to advance in culture. Still living in the state they did when they were first noticed by the Old Ones, Savage Orcs are as dumb as can be. They barely have a language, barely have capacity for learning, and barely have any sort of gear barring teeth, bones, and sticks with mud. They were simple scraps of leather and grass if anything at all. While they have tales surpassing the normal Orcish attention span going back throughout Orcish history, they are just as tied to fights (and hunting) as one would expect. They cling to these stories as the example by which all Orcs should live by, and have a great deal of hate for their modernized cousins.

So how do Orcs succeed? The same way they do in 40k. Savage Orcs are capable of the same feat of believing in something hard enough that it happens or works. The most complex part of their culture is their system of warpaints, which produces the belief that makes the results true. Blue spikes on the chest protect from arrows, and the Orc's skin cannot be pierced with them. A drawing of an eye on the stomach make them a conduit for Gork and Mork (or Mork and Gork?)'s will, and suddenly you have a level 1 Wizard. As a result, much of Savage Orcish communication (even verbal, as drawing accompanies it) is done in pictographs. Savage Orcs have an amazing capacity for abstract representations in this regard, translating the Elvish script on Waystones before the defacing of them begins. In addition, the capacity for planning and strategy in the minds of modern Orcs is replaced by absolute savagery unknown to even Khornate berserkers as Orcs tear across the battlefield faster than Cheetahs and stronger than Ogres.

Savage Orcs often employ logs with a giant stone tip at the end carried by two Orcs as a giant spear. In ages past, the Orcs used these to hunt large prey and to bring down Lizardmen who hunted them. As a result, Savage Orcs still do this regardless of whether it is useful or not. Shrunken heads, fetish totems, and various other things that not even Elves and Empire Wizards can understand the workings of are carried by their leaders.

tl;dr Savage Orcs are Warhammer Dwarf Orcs.

• Goblins:

• Goblin Wolf Riders:

• Night Goblins:

• Forest Goblin Spider Riders:

Special

• Black Orcs:

• Orc Boar Boyz:

• Savage Orc Boar Boyz:

Savage Orcs keep the company of large packs of wild boars, who share their food and follow the Orc tribes wherever they go. Said boars are not the boars of Earth, but rather horse-sized monsters with skin like tanned leather. The boars roam freely, as the Savage Orcs believe they are a gift from their gods and are kindred spirits. Before battle, any Orc wishing to ride a boar must (by himself) catch and headbutt into unconsciousness one of the pack. He and his bros will paint the boar, ritually scar, and adorn the boar as they see fit. When it awakens, it finds itself mounted by an Orc foaming at the mouth and often carrying one weapon in each hand swinging at anything nearby.

• Orc Boar Chariot:

• Goblin Wolf Chariot:

• Goblin Spear Chukka:

• Night Goblin Squig Hoppers:

• Night Goblin Squig Herd:

• Snotlings:

• Trolls:

Rare

• Goblin Rock Lobber:

• Doom Diver Catapult:

• Snotling Pump Wagon:

• Arachnarok Spider:

• Mangler Squigs:

• Stone Trolls:

• River Trolls:

• Giant:

Long ago, Giants lived on the tops of mountains in an area roughly analogous to the Himalayas of our world. They were left there by the Old Ones, who had created them as a race dear to their hearts (like the High Elves) who were nonetheless not the perfect living weapons to use to fight Chaos. They were gifted by many Old One devices, magics, and lessons which guided their race into a utopia of families living in distant isolated castles. Then the race created just after them, half-formed and dumb as rocks stuck in mud, came. Ogres were creatures which possessed little save their massive hunger, and having been driven out of their homeland of the Mongolian Steppes by the arrival of the Great Maw they were looking for a new place to settle. Ogres reproduced as fast as men, with the durability of Dwarfs, and came in MASSIVE numbers. Upon meeting an infinitely wiser race of peaceful beings so tall they couldn't see their faces, the Ogres immediately attacked with the intention of eating every single scrap and bone of every man woman and child of the Giants they could find. After many years, the Ogres finally accomplished their goal; the few remaining Giants had managed to mount their castles upon clouds and fled the world of mortals. After realizing there was no food to be found, the Ogres then moved on westwards again.

But not all Giants had been wiped out. Some during the years of fates worse than death had fled northwards and westwards. The Giants who survived lived in small communities, with each generation hearing less and less of the tales of their ancestors until the modern day Giants who are barely more intelligent than Orcs and have many of the same behaviors (mainly consumption of whatever they can find whenever they can find it) of Ogres. Most stick to themselves, destroying human villages and moving on. But some find themselves captured by the servants of Chaos and are goaded into doing the bidding of the Beastmen. Still others are recruited eagerly by greenskins, who show them a degree of respect (afterall, they ARE the biggest gits around!) that no other races affords them. Giants living among greenskins have good lives, getting intellectual stimulation from conversing with the Orcs and Goblins (who are unusually talkative when asked questions by a creature strong enough to crush a boulder to pebbles within their same tribe) and any captives the Orcs and Goblins take. They are never without food as any time the greenskins fight (including amongst each other) there are ample corpses around which the greenskins have only a passing interest in.

Giants are VERY fond of alcohol. While greenskins have little to no interest in it, most are willing to brew it to secure the services of the Giant. Some Goblins however are clever enough to realize that it is a successful recruiting tool as well.

Giants often adorn themselves in things too large to be of use to their smaller allies, like the parts from Steam Tanks or the bones of things like Dragons.

Misc Fluff

Racial relations are as follows:

• Dwarfs AKA Stuntiez are being driven back by the Goblins, peak by peak and fortress by fortress. Dwarfs have begun to adapt technology for the upper hand in the *long-standing war and have received aid from both elf and human, it may be far too little far too late.
• Ogres make good fights. Also good comrades for the greenskins who can pay them.
• Dark Elves make use of greenskins as pawns, sometimes rewarding them. Greenskins are usually outsmarted by the more clever Dark Elves into fighting another group. Usually...
• Wood Elves drive them back from Athel Loren whenever possible. Greenskins continually try to cross it to reach Bretonnia or the Empire for fights.
• High Elves have earned the respect of greenskins the world over by, after the invasion of his homeland by Grom the Paunch, Eltharion the Grim attempted to wipe out the greenskin race using fire magic and made better headway than any other race in history. He has retreated home, relying on the reputation he has earned to inspire WAAAGH!s to come to him and dwindle against the natural and magical defenses until they are so diminished his forces can finish them off once and for all. It seems that he's been successful at least in getting the word out.
• The Empire are easy pickings, not bad for fights.
• Bretonnia is better fights.
• Lizardmen are even better fights than that.
• Vampires are better fights than the Empire and close, but have less loot.
• Tomb Kings have great loot! But it's hard to find them.
• Warriors of Chaos are glorious fights!
• Daemons are strange gits that come from swirly magic portals some places. Shamans can bring them in intentionally when fights are scarce.
• Beastmen are good fights, and better food.
• Skaven are sneaky gits, and make for poor fights. But there's a lot of fighting to be done and they make for good eats.

Regions

Orcs and Goblins exist...everywhere. Like Beastmen and Ogres, they are found on every continent and most regions.

Crunch

• 

  Living high on the WAAAGH can be tiring.

• 

  Dat's finkin' wiff' mehjick!

• 

  Da proppa' use of Stuntiez.

• 

  This is a cake. Made for the launch of Warhammer Online, made by those guys who had a cake show on Food Network on an actual episode until it got canceled. Suck it, Orks.

• 

  Seeing Tzeentch would drive these guys sane. Seriously, not an exaggeration.

• 

  Let'z go, let'z go, WAAAGH! WAAAGH! WAAAGH!

See Also

• Tactics/Orcs and Goblins