Commissar

A commissar is an officer in the Imperial Guard whose job it is to keep morale high by blowing the brains out of anyone who shows sign of weakness or fear. It works, statistically. They get a cool hat, and a sword they seem all too happy to hit the enemy with.

They seem to be a bunch of dic*BLAM*

Reasonable Commissars

Reasonable Commissars do not execute those who flee. However, they do carry a potent stun-gun to bring down those who break ranks. Afterwards, the accused is brought before a military tribunal to judge what the appropriate punishment will be. Reasonably Hard Labor is a common punishment.

Reasonable Commissars can often be found in units operating alongside Reasonable Marines.

Reasonable commissars only exist because there are commissars who are dicks- (peeks side to side) -such as Commissar Jericho of the 8th cadian white shield division-

Lil' Timmy: "Commissar? my helmet wont fit. can you please help me fasten it?"

Jericho: "IF YOU CANNOT FASTEN YOUR OWN HELMET, YOU'RE AN INEFFECTIVE SOLDIER! AN INEFFECTIVE SOLDIER IS THE SAME AS A HERETIC IN MY BOOK! Summary execution for you." *BLAM*

Jericho: "SO. ANY OF YOU OTHER CHILDREN WANT HELP WITH SOMETHING? WHAT ABOUT YOU, OLIVER? DO YOU STILL WANT MORE PORRIDGE? OH WAIT, YOU'RE DEAD! HAH! GET BACK TO FIGHTING YOU LITTLE PIECES OF SLIME!"

- from the records of inquisitor Murtho

Notable Commissars

• Colonel-Commissar Ibram Gaunt
• Commissar Yarrick
• Commissar Fuklaw
• Commissar Dan

Gallery

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  The real reason why Guardsmen do not revolt en masse

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  Told you about those swords!

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  He's the new commissar. OH SHI-

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  Commissars are badass

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  Commissar Dan on the blaze of glory run

• File:What kind of heresy is this.jpg
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  Chink loev comissar

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  Commissar Yarrick by Chink

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  Commissar from the ill-fated /tg/ calendar project

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  One of these is not like the others.

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