Commissar Holt: Difference between revisions
m (85 revisions imported) |
|||
| (16 intermediate revisions by 10 users not shown) | |||
| Line 1: | Line 1: | ||
{{/vg/}} | {{/vg/}} | ||
{{Oldschool}} | |||
[[Image: Holt.jpg|thumb| It is not possible for him to be not awesome.]] | [[Image: Holt.jpg|thumb| It is not possible for him to be not awesome.]] | ||
| Line 13: | Line 14: | ||
== Volistad == | == Volistad == | ||
Holt was notified of an impending [[Ork]] [[WAAAGH|Waaagh!]] heading for the Imperial planet of [[Volistad]], and immediately diverted to the planet. With the help of an [[Ultramarines]] detachment, Holt was able to establish a base on the planet for external reinforcements to land. | Holt was notified of an impending [[Ork]] [[WAAAGH|Waaagh!]] heading for the Imperial planet of [[Volistad]], and immediately diverted to the planet. With the help of an [[Ultramarines]] detachment, Holt was able to establish a base on the planet for external reinforcements to land. Being pre-[[Matt Ward|pre-Wardian]] in their sueness, the Ultramarines there led by Captain Agrippa expressed his gratitude for the Commissar's rescue and even said that "no living Commissar holds no more respect". | ||
He also managed (with the help of the Commander General, AKA you) to get some [[Adeptus Mechanicus|cogboys]] to an unnoticed cargo bay and managed to summon a fucking Warhound titan. | Holt being cool as cucumber salad simply dismisses Agrippa with a vaguely irritated "That will be all, Agrippa". | ||
Course, this might imply that this has to be some time before [[Ciaphas Cain|any]] [[Yarrick|other]] [[Colonel-Commissar Ibram Gaunt|badass]] [[Commissar Lord Bernn|Commissar]] alive became badass. Or after they died. You know. | |||
He also managed (with the help of the Commander General, AKA you) to get some [[Adeptus Mechanicus|cogboys]] to an unnoticed cargo bay and managed to summon a fucking Warhound titan. At some point, those same cogboys would also uncover a fuckmothering WARLORD BATTLE TITAN. | |||
Holt is more than willing to tell you you suck at liberating an Imperial world, he'll do it quiet out back (presumably near your stercore-class portajohn), reminding you he's served under [[blam|two]] lord commanders in a single campaign before ... if you collapse entirely, he takes command to salvage what he can and in a moment of deep menace (you'd rather just have the pistol in the face) obliquely indicates the next attempt will be led by [[blam|someone else]]. | Holt is more than willing to tell you you suck at liberating an Imperial world, he'll do it quiet out back (presumably near your stercore-class portajohn), reminding you he's served under [[blam|two]] lord commanders in a single campaign before ... if you collapse entirely, he takes command to salvage what he can and in a moment of deep menace (you'd rather just have the pistol in the face) obliquely indicates the next attempt will be led by [[blam|someone else]]. | ||
| Line 27: | Line 32: | ||
Holt has gladly executed numerous Imperial Governors for mistreating troops that would be far more suited dying for the [[God-Emperor of Mankind|Emperor]]. | Holt has gladly executed numerous Imperial Governors for mistreating troops that would be far more suited dying for the [[God-Emperor of Mankind|Emperor]]. | ||
<s>His full name is Fenstrum Holt, leading some fans to speculate that defenestration (historically the traditional Czech method of dismissing unpopular Prime Ministers) is his preferred method of execution.</s> | |||
Actually that's a different [[Eagle Ordinary|Holt]]. | |||
== Holt in Deathwatch == | == Holt in Deathwatch == | ||
[[Fantasy Flight Games]] once again proved they were beardiest of companies, showing their collective raging hard-on for Holt with a large number of (All new!) quotes throughout the [[Deathwatch]] gameline, collected below: | [[Fantasy Flight Games]] once again proved they were the beardiest of companies, showing their collective raging hard-on for Holt with a large number of (All new!) quotes throughout the [[Deathwatch]] gameline, collected below: | ||
* ''"[[Space Marine]]s are men in the same way a knife is a piece of metal. Space Marines are forged, not born. They are the finest weapons of the Emperor's Will."'' | * ''"[[Space Marine]]s are men in the same way a knife is a piece of metal. Space Marines are forged, not born. They are the finest weapons of the Emperor's Will."'' | ||
| Line 38: | Line 46: | ||
* ''"All too often, the difference between victory and defeat lies with one man."'' | * ''"All too often, the difference between victory and defeat lies with one man."'' | ||
* ''"The coward represents as great a threat as a traitor. The traitor at least stands by his convictions."'' | * ''"The coward represents as great a threat as a traitor. The traitor at least stands by his convictions."'' | ||
<s>[[Wrath & Glory|Wrath and Glory]] also carries on the tradition, and give us his first name. | |||
* ''"Those men, whose lives you spent with such cavalier disregard - those men were Imperial Guard. They were Munitorum property. They belonged to the Segmentum Command. They belonged to the Emperor.“ - Commissar Fenstrum Holt''</s> | |||
Actually that's a different [[Eagle Ordinary|Holt]]. Check Page 27 of Eagle Ordinary (Uncivil Disagreement[[https://www.smackjeeves.com/discover/detail?titleNo=148679&articleNo=27]] | |||
). | |||
The above quote also proves that the writer's of Wrath & Glory are continuing the FFG tradition of slipping fanworks into 40k Canon. | |||
== Gallery == | == Gallery == | ||
Latest revision as of 11:14, 20 June 2023
|
This is a /v/ related article, which we tolerate because it's relevant and/or popular on /tg/... or we just can't be bothered to delete it. |
 | This article or section is about something oldschool - and awesome. Make sure your rose-tinted glasses are on nice and tight, and prepare for a lovely walk down nostalgia lane. |
Commissar Holt is a badass muthafucka who enjoys pimp slapping the shit out of stuck up Imperial governors for stories of their ineptitude. He is originally from the Warhammer 40k computer game Final Liberation, which about only two people played.
Commissar from Warhammer Epic 40,000: Final Liberation. (You're gonna need the patch... or get the updated version on Good Old Games.)
Kane loves him.
His other jobs include Pirate and Vampire Overseer of werewolf-slaves.
Volistad[edit]
Holt was notified of an impending Ork Waaagh! heading for the Imperial planet of Volistad, and immediately diverted to the planet. With the help of an Ultramarines detachment, Holt was able to establish a base on the planet for external reinforcements to land. Being pre-pre-Wardian in their sueness, the Ultramarines there led by Captain Agrippa expressed his gratitude for the Commissar's rescue and even said that "no living Commissar holds no more respect".
Holt being cool as cucumber salad simply dismisses Agrippa with a vaguely irritated "That will be all, Agrippa".
Course, this might imply that this has to be some time before any other badass Commissar alive became badass. Or after they died. You know.
He also managed (with the help of the Commander General, AKA you) to get some cogboys to an unnoticed cargo bay and managed to summon a fucking Warhound titan. At some point, those same cogboys would also uncover a fuckmothering WARLORD BATTLE TITAN.
Holt is more than willing to tell you you suck at liberating an Imperial world, he'll do it quiet out back (presumably near your stercore-class portajohn), reminding you he's served under two lord commanders in a single campaign before ... if you collapse entirely, he takes command to salvage what he can and in a moment of deep menace (you'd rather just have the pistol in the face) obliquely indicates the next attempt will be led by someone else.
The Imperial forces on Volistad, which Holt keeps in good order, include (in cut scenes) Titans, Mordians, Tallarn, Volistad PDF (who are very Valhalla-looking) and Ultramarines while in campaign he also can lead Catachans and Attilans; with a bit of game-file fiddling he can also call upon Imperial Knights.
Badassery[edit]
He arm wrestled Commissar Yarrick and won. Yarrick got out of it only by sheer luck, though, when the Orks appeared and kidnapped Yarrick. However, Holt did not let this pass, and he proceeded to destroy 134 Trukks, 200 squads of Shoota Boyz, 15 Nobs, a Warboss, and a Mekboy carrying a Shokk Attakk Gun simply by giving them the *SLAP* COMMISSAR Holt! look.
Another (Retarded) story about Holt is where the fuck he went; as he was leading ten million conscripts into battle against Chaos, the Warp unexpectedly opened and daemons started appearing. Not about to retreat, Holt charged into the daemon horde, shooting them with his bolter and slicing them with his power sword. Suddenly, a Daemon Prince appeared; Holt instantly squared it up and charged, cutting the foul daemon in half. As he stood triumphantly, he tripped, while standing still, over a fallen guardsman and fell into the Warp. There, he saw the most vile, unholy, and Mary Sue force in the Warp; Kaldor Draigo.
Holt has gladly executed numerous Imperial Governors for mistreating troops that would be far more suited dying for the Emperor.
His full name is Fenstrum Holt, leading some fans to speculate that defenestration (historically the traditional Czech method of dismissing unpopular Prime Ministers) is his preferred method of execution.
Actually that's a different Holt.
Holt in Deathwatch[edit]
Fantasy Flight Games once again proved they were the beardiest of companies, showing their collective raging hard-on for Holt with a large number of (All new!) quotes throughout the Deathwatch gameline, collected below:
- "Space Marines are men in the same way a knife is a piece of metal. Space Marines are forged, not born. They are the finest weapons of the Emperor's Will."
- "A finely crafted weapon is like a finely-crafted battle plan. Both will serve you well."
- "No one man, however exalted or base, is more important than the mission."
- "I have watched massive Titans striding the battlefield. I have seen entire armoured divisions at war with the Ork hordes. I have borne witness to the firepower of an orbital lance strike. Yet among all these, none compare to the effectiveness of the Adeptus Astartes at war."
- "No foe is more pernicious when dug-in than the forces of the Archenemy."
- "All too often, the difference between victory and defeat lies with one man."
- "The coward represents as great a threat as a traitor. The traitor at least stands by his convictions."
Wrath and Glory also carries on the tradition, and give us his first name.
"Those men, whose lives you spent with such cavalier disregard - those men were Imperial Guard. They were Munitorum property. They belonged to the Segmentum Command. They belonged to the Emperor.“ - Commissar Fenstrum Holt
Actually that's a different Holt. Check Page 27 of Eagle Ordinary (Uncivil Disagreement[[1]] ).
The above quote also proves that the writer's of Wrath & Glory are continuing the FFG tradition of slipping fanworks into 40k Canon.
Gallery[edit]
-
Choose your next words with exceptional care!
-
lolwut?
-
| Famous members of the Imperial Guard | |
|---|---|
| Commissars: | |
| Senior Officers: | |
| Junior Officers: | |
| Enlisted Guardsmen: | |