Touhou

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Touhou is usually seen in character optimization threads because the major Touhoufags are min-maxers.
Gensokyo, the setting of Touhou, does not actually look like this Yukkuri head version of Ringworld, but it would be awesome if it did.
The 40k drawfags do Touhou work on rare occasions.
There is a Touhou pic for nearly every situation. Even situations that will never ever be brought up otherwise.

Touhou is Japanese and made from ZUN and danmaku. It is a series of danmaku ("bullet hell") vertical shooters, known for its lolis and the plethora of fanart thereof. Touhoufags typically post these whenever they can, as there seems to be a Touhou fanart for every possible topic. Why? Because Japan.

Touhou is usually seen in D&D threads, particularly ones involving character optimization. Fa/tg/uys generally don't mind Touhou, except for certain faggots from Alabama who coined the nonsensical epithet "pork eye", as long as it is kept from taking over the discussion, but instead used to further it or spice it up. For Touhou-centric posts not related to traditional games, we recommend visiting /jp/.

There are an Imperial fuckton of Touhoe characters. According to this page, there are currently 64 Touhoes, not counting the couple of male characters and the PC-98 characters, but including two of the more well-known PC-98 characters (Mima and Shinki) and the minor characters from the official doujins. A quick rundown of a few of the Touhoes the goes as follows:

  • Reimu is an undead zombie a red-white miko a wonderful shrine maiden of paradise. She is one of the two main characters of the series. Her good points are her armpits. Her abilities include flight, utter invincibility invoked when she feels like it (Fantasy Heaven), killing everyone with her balls, and inexplicable overpoweredness, exemplifying the concept of CoDzilla in D&D 3.5. She is a cleric, after all.
  • Marisa is a black-white witch an ordinary magician who has the biggest lesbian harem known to mankind. She is the other main character of the series. She stole Alice's precious thing.
  • Sakuya is a maid with a known fondness of Time Stop and Haste spells. Her race, origin, or how she got that many 9th level slots are all unknown. May or may not be a female Dio Brando in an alternate universe.
  • Alice, when not hopelessly lusting over Marisa, spends all her time stuck in her house crafting and playing with dolls, much like certain fa/tg/uys.
  • Patchouli is a pajama-wearing, century-old, Vancian wizzart loli who spends all her time in a library reading books. She dumped her Constitution score, hence why she is asthmatic, anemic, and generally sickly like Raistlin Majere. Changes her prepared spells list depending on the day of the week.
  • Yukari has unfair boundary powers. She is the DM of Gensokyo. Rumor has it there is no hole she would not enter.
  • Ran is Yukari's 10% furry familiar. (70% if you go by volume, but it's mostly tail-fluff.) When not being molested by Yukari, she is a hard-working streaker and pedophile.
  • Chen is Ran's catgirl familiar. Sometimes Ran touches her in bad places, but Chen is cute, so it's okay.
  • Youmu is too soft, but the things her masterwork bastard sword cannot cut are next to none.
  • Yuyuko is a princess of the underworld, and can kill people by thinking at them. Always hungry.
  • Reisen is a moon rabbit who deserted her frontline military position and went AWOL as Primarch Neil Armstrong and his SPEHSS MAHREENS were purging xenos in the Lunar Capital in the name of the God-President of America. If you look into her red eyes and fail your Will save, you will go batshit insane.
  • Tewi is an earth rabbit of happiness who has achieved immortality through sheer force of luck. Chaotic evil.
  • Chiquita Dragonforce Tenshi is a dragon celestial gish with a perpetually rotating rock that floats, peaches on her hat that vaguely resemble butts, powers over the earth overlapping with another character's abilities, and a prismatic Holy Avenger with the ability to shoot multilasers.

In general, Touhoes may die if their headwear of choice is removed, though certain bare-headed exceptions such as Kaguya Houraisan and Yuka Kazami cast doubt on this, however.


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