Angron

From 2d4chan
Revision as of 10:33, 14 December 2010 by 1d4chan>Xal'ammit
Jump to navigation Jump to search
FUCK YOU!!!

The ANGRIEST second angriest son of a bitch in the galaxy, tied with An'ggrath.He was so angry that the part of him that was angry exploded from his head, thus making him permanently angry. Being kidnapped by the Emprah didn't help matters so he fucking RAGED at his dad by joining up with Khorne, Warhammer's God of Battle, War and RAAAAAAAAAAGE! Primarch of the World Eaters and that swell guy. He is Khorne's second most powerful champion, where he falls short to Doombreed, Khorne's first ever Daemon Prince/Champion.

Among his revered exploits include slaughtering the entire population of a planet within a night, killing an entire contingent of Eldar soldiers led by a Farseer in his sleep, leading a gladiator rebellion against their employers and slaughtering every army sent against them. Until a huge one made up about seven came and fucked their shit up. However, one must understand that they had already beaten 25 others non stop and didn't even have tea afterwards. The Emperor saved him from dying here, which was a tremendous hit to his martial pride and soon after he RAAAAAAAAAAGEed furiously against the Emperor, believing him a coward devoid of honor and joined up with KHORNE the aforementioned God of War, Strength, Killing, Bloodshed, Battle, RAAAAAAAAAAGE.

He also slaughtered his way throughout Imperial Space for over a century with 50,000 World Eater Berserkers and destroyed/maim'dkill'dburn'd/broke the backs of/split open/fucked 70 sectors. However, in a subsequent Imperial offensive, Angron was banished to the warp and his men routed. To be fair, this strike force was comprised of 2 Titan Legions, 4 full Spess Mehreen chapters and over 30 Imperial Guard regiments to do that. And again to be fair, they put up quite a fight against the superior force. And even more impressive was that Angron's force was only comprised of Close Combat heavy infantry, no ranged support, no artillery, more like an angry mob of pissed off supermen than an actual army! Which lends credence to the fact, Khornate Berzerkerz = Awesome.

Later on, he showed up with an even bigger force to attack Armageddon. The Imperium responded in kind, sending in one hundred Grey Knight Terminators, and all but ten of them died fighting Angron. Took 'em about a week. Fuck yeah.

He is armed with a really huge fucking chainaxe that's taller than him with chainswords for the chainteeth of the chainaxe. He's also got a stormbolter, but we wouldn't be surprised if that fired chainswords as well. Fittingly enough, it was called 'Godtearer'.

Oh yeah, and he was lobotomized long ago so he finds joy only killing shit. He then replicated this technology on his fellow legionaries, despite the Empy's warnings. Even in spite of this, however, that swell guy became Angron's 'cool head'. Ironic.

Angron has done far more shit than all the other Daemon Primarchs put together. Instead of sitting around being a painting on some Chaos God's wall, sitting around while being a rotting fatass and feeling sorry for themselves, sitting around and yelling just as planned anytime anything happens,sitting around and preaching constantly, sitting around doing Gork and Mork knows what, being dead, or being missing Angron actually gets shit done and boy howdy when he rages his way out of the eye of terror he makes sure that everyone knows about it...by tearing everything that gets in his way a new one until he finally gets thrown back into the warp by drowning in a quadrillion metric fucktons of Imperial Guardsmen, Planetary Defense Force soldiers, Spehss Mehreens, Witch Hunters, Bolter Bitches, Titans, Inquisitorial Storm troopers, Daemonhunters, and Grey Knights, but to be fair, everyone kind of does that when the Imperium finishes the paperwork needed to retaliate.

One day the Chaos Pretty Marines asked if they could join his World Eaters in his Dominion of Fire campaign, he responded to this offer by chopping up 900 of the prissy little Slaanesh worshipping faggots and grabbed their Chaos Chapter Master and Chief Sorcerer by the necks and tossed them into a black hole while screaming "FFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-" throughout the entire hour of butchery. To this day the Chaos Pretty Marines remain too undermanned to participate in any black crusades or Angron rages, which isn't really a surprise since Angron has been fucking the loyalist Pretty Marines' shit up at every turn.

He also once came down to Fulgrim's Daemon World and beat the shit out of the prissy little Slaanesh worshipping faggot and left the almost dead Slaaneshi marines with the message "SLAANESH IS FOR FUCKING PUSSIES YOU COCKSUCKING FAGGOTS!!!!" Which was spelled out in their blood on a 5 hectare field. He did it because he was still trying to solve the rubick's cube he still had since his loyalist days and was still frustrated over the fact how he still can't solve it. It is considered really fucking stupid to bring up the topic of even more complex variations of the rubick's cubes like the 4x4x4 around him, much less unholy monstrosities like the 7x7x7 V-7 cube.

He has stats from white dwarf that makes him a 500 point walking rapemachine who makes Abaddon the despoiler and Mephiston look like total pussies, but you have to get him a bodyguard of at least 7-12 bloodthirsters, which effectively racks up his point cost to over 1300 at the least. But with his mandatory bloodthirster bodyguard he can even kill An'ggrath, the biggest and baddest bloodthirster of them all. But they would never fight in canon because An'ggrath is one of the only entities in the universe that Angron respects due to An'ggrath's equal capacity for RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAEEEEEEEEGGGG!!! RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGG GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!