Bear Lore: Difference between revisions

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*DC45: The best spy is the dead one.
*DC45: The best spy is the dead one.
*DC50: NEVERMIND HE'S GOT A DEAD-RINGER.





Revision as of 04:01, 1 September 2013

We're not even making this shit up.

What's that? A large, furry, aggressive animal has just interrupted your party? BEAR LORE TIME!

Roll a Nature check.

  • DC15: Cave bears live in caves.
  • DC20: Dire bears like to attack with their natural weapons.

For the same DC regarding manticores, you get to know it has 3 rows of teeth and that it can speak common and that it can be tricked easily.

The Bear Lore meme started right when the 4th edition core books were leaked online. After paging through them, someone found a chart for "bear lore" which had dc checks to find out amazingly stupid things about bears. Someone posted this on /tg/ and there were many lulz to be had as people continued to talk about what else there is to learn about bears, among other things. The meme originated here: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/1839136/

Alternatively, a Religion check on bears provides the following:

  • DC15: Bears do not attend any continuous services of worship. They are ready to kill at all hours of the week.
  • DC20: They mysteriously vanish every winter, perhaps to give reverence to their perverse fertility goddess while gorging on the souls of men lost to famine.
  • DC25: Bear society has no visibly ordained clerics.
  • DC35: SHIT NEVERMIND THEY HAVE THEM, RUN.


Other Lore

Bee Lore

A character knows the following information with a successful Nature check.

  • DC15: Bees generally live in hives or trees.
  • DC20: NO!! NOT THE BEES! NOT THE BEES!!! AAGGH!!! THEY'RE IN MY EYES! AAAGGGGHHH!!1!
  • DC 25: I'M COVERED IN BEEEEEEES (-10 to all seduction checks)


Fire Lore

A character knows the following information with a successful Nature check.

  • DC15: Fire is Hot
  • DC20: Only YOU can prevent forest fires
  • DC25: If you were smart enough not to touch fire, you'd not NEED the stop-drop-roll info, and if you touched the fire, it's too late to make that check now. Enjoy burning to death!
  • DC30: IT'S FUCKIN' HOT IN HERE.


Water Lore

A character knows the following information with a successful Nature check.

  • DC15: The water is cold.
  • DC20: You can drink water.
  • DC25: Humans might not be able to use it to breathe.


Fuzzy Wozzie Lore

  • DC15: Fuzzy Wozzie was a bear
  • DC20: Fuzzy Wozzie had no hair
  • DC25: Fuzzy Wozzie wasn't fuzzy was he?


Cliff Lore

A character knows the following information with a successful Geography check.

  • DC15: Cliffs usually live at the edge of things
  • DC20: If you walk off a cliff you will be hurt
  • DC25: All of the gods know that 4th edition sucks and urge you to jump and end it all


Spy Lore

A character knows the following information with a successful /v/ check.

  • DC15: The knife in your back was placed by a spy
  • DC25: That's your blood on his suit
  • DC35: I was a spy all a long.
  • DC40: He never really was on our side.
  • DC45: The best spy is the dead one.
  • DC50: NEVERMIND HE'S GOT A DEAD-RINGER.


Human Lore

  • DC10: They are squishy
  • DC20: They're bastards most of the time.
  • DC30: HOLY SWINGING FUCK THEY LIVE IN CITIES?


Pyro Lore

A character knows the following information with a successful /v/ check.

  • DC20: Pyros hate spies.
  • DC30: Flamethrower kills spies dead.
  • DC40: Pyros like Fire. Brush up on your Fire Lore.


Dark Lore

A character knows the following information with a successful Nature check.

  • DC10: It's dark in here.
  • DC20: OM NOM NOM NOM NOM.
  • DC25: Shoulda brought a candle.
  • DC30: Dark congregates around Grim.


Tzeentch Lore

A character cannot know the following information.

  • DC20: Tzeentch makes plans.
  • DC25: Just as planned.
  • DC30: Just as planned.
  • DC35: These dice are loaded, and will roll exactly what Tzeentch wants you to roll.


Box Lore

A character knows the following information with a successful Knowledge check.

  • DC 10: Metal boxes are made of metal.
  • DC 20: Enemies like to hide in metal boxes.
  • DC 25: To maximise combat effectiveness, take away their metal boxes.
  • DC 35: SINDRIIIIIIIIII!


Economy Lore

  • DC10: The state of the economy is excellent.
  • DC15: There is a problem with Fannie Mae.
  • DC20: OMG
  • DC25: You can purchase "The Republic of Iceland" on eBay for $229.99 (inc. VAT).


Plan Lore

  • DC10: Make a Plan.
  • DC15: Carry out Plan.
  • DC20: ????????????
  • DC25: PROFIT!
  • DC99: Tzeench made your plan, and gave it to you without you knowing about it. Just as planned.


Nebbish Lore

A character knows the following information with a successful Neckbeard check.

  • DC20: Being unknowingly nebbish is annoying.
  • DC25: Being deliberately annoying is nebbish.
  • DC35: GTFO!


Cat Lore

A character knows the following information with a successful Nature check.

  • DC10: Ceiling cat is watching you masturbate.
  • DC15: Cats eat mice
  • DC20: Cats Hate you. No exceptions.
  • DC35: Cats can sometimes be Girls.
  • DC40: Nekos are the best cats.


Hat Lore

A character knows the following information with a successful Irish check.

  • DC15: Hats live on hatracks, or people's heads.
  • DC20: Hats can be used as a drinking apparatus.
  • DC40: Commissars wear hats. Don't tell anyo*BLAM*


Internet Lore

A character knows the following information with a successful Computers check.

  • DC10: The internet is for porn.
  • DC15: The internet is not a big truck.
  • DC20: The internet is a series of tubes.
  • DC35: Skynet has been born, and has sent robot killers back in time to Terminate you.
  • DC40: You're on the internet right now!

Gallery

See Also