Avatar

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Avatar is a totally shite heretical xeno-lover movie by closet furry,James Cameron. It involves a cool jungle moons, a huge amount of weird animals, power-hungry humans mining for a ridiculously named material (Unobtainium, seriously, who came up with that name?!) and a race of hot blue natives known as the Na'vi.

Things that rock

This movie is fucking awesome. Here are some reasons why.

• Giant monsters that eat ten foot tall Na'vi warriors for breakfast.
• Large amounts of furries slaughtered like livestock.
• Furries armed with bows and arrows can kill helicopters.
• Massive evil corporations make ridiculous plans in an attempt to make loadsa money.

Things that suck

Of course, nothing is ever perfect. There are a lot of things wrong with it. Such things include:

• The movie is a total rip-off of Disney's Pochahontas, or, to be more precise, Dances With Wolves clumsily welded to Ferngully.
• Anytime a cool creature shows up, the camera changes to a view of random blue guys
• 2 words: crippled marine!!!!!11l||!!!11!
• The mechs don't have gun arms! (But that's because they are multi-purpose machines, not originally meant for combat. Think of them as fork-trucks. But they could have had it shoulder-mounted. Jeez.)(and they carry big ass guns, and a fucking KNIFE!)
• The blue things breed with their hair. They also use their breeding things with animals. Yes, that means...
• The marines are depicted as ruthless douche-bag mercenaries.
• Unforgivable lack of orbital bombardment or nukes or any semi-intelligent military tactics.
• The humans aren't big enough douche-bags. Because we all know Catholic Space Nazis are the bomb.
• Only one marine, a Colonel Miles Quaritch, had balls of steel.
• Blue Exodite Eldar? Fuck you James Cameron, fuck you with a chainsword.
• Xenos love? That's EXTRA HERETICAL!
• FUCKING FURRIES!
• No tactical genius whatsoever.(I mean, who charges a fucking gun line with cavalry armed with bows and arrows? The same guy who thinks it's a good idea to send regiments of regular human soldiers armed with cardboard for armor and flashlights for guns against heavily armored, batshit insane superhumans capable of tearing them apart in 3 seconds or less, Technologically advanced space communists capable of picking them off like flies a mile away, horridly savage xenomorphs who wants to nom nom your entire squad in a single bite, mysterious space elves with xenotech you have no fucking idea about and Green-skinned xenos that were made for fighten'. )
• The film insinuates that xenocide is bad. But we all know how one should deal with spess elves.
• The unobtainable mineral that the marines want is called unobtainium

And Another Thing

And another side note: The blue space elf people didn't really think too hard when they let the humans go in the end of the movie... so in about ten years the humans will return.... with bombs.

And a psychotic old man does a review slagging Avatar at YouTube.

Gallery

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  The first rough draft of the script.

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  One of the most iconic victories in the movie.

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  An up-close look at a Na'vi specimen.

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  The avatar creation program in progress.

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  Read this comic and you basically have seen the whole movie.

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  The whole movie, beginning to end.

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  A na'vi mating ritual in process.

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• For some reason, he doesn't realize the giant, growling monster 2 feet away from him.

  For some reason, he doesn't realize the giant, growling monster 2 feet away from him.

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  THIS IS SPARTA!!!!!!!!

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  Unleash the furry!