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'''THE GRAND DAD EMPIRE''' ARE a prolific VINESAUCE-centric MEME group based in BEDROCK CITY. Their largest periods of activity seemed to be around the time SILVAGUNNER was terminated, when they were hosting several unofficial VINESAUCE gaming events (which they assure you repeatedly are ''not'' official Tournaments and are in no way affiliated with JOEL).
[[Image:Duke uses poison.jpg|thumb|left|100 px|Yeah, he's kinda weird like that]]


They operated out of the SilvaGunner YouTube channel until it was terminated in 2014, after which they appear to have transitioned briefly to GiivaSunner in September of 2016 before returning to SilvaGunner in June of 2018.
The Duke of pirates, Traevelliath Sliscus (Better known as "The Duke" or "Sliscus the Serpent") is the [[Dark Eldar]] answer to [[Prince Yriel]] as top space pirates, acting as the posterboy for exiled Dark Eldar who want to do what they want 'cuz a pirate is free (a popular theory is that he is Yriels father, given the mystery as to how the Iyanden craftworlder was conceived). He is as talented as a Shakespearean wordsmith, carving epic poetry into his prisoners bodies after injecting them with a buttload of poisons. He is also essentially David Bowie circa 1977.


== CHANNELS ==
This is how [[Lady Malys]] describes the Duke: "Amoral, despicable and impeccably dressed into the bargain". When other Dark Eldar say that about you, you know you have some serious style.
The original forums appeared to function as four services: preparation and communication in service of coming events, discussion about new HIGH-QUALITY RIPS, MEME showcase, and general VINESAUCE or unrelated discussion.


{{awesome}}== EVENTS ==
[[Image:1523879696471d.png|thumb|right|300 px|The closest you'll ever get to a decent image of a Dark Eldar who isn't Vect or Lelith.]]
The VINESAUCE MEME events that The GRAND DAD EMPIRE held were known for being diverse and involved, due in large part to their incredibly strong YTP scene.  These events would involve VINESAUCE-branded fan-made HIGH-QUALITY RIPS for SONGS that wouldn't exist for nearly a decade, and some that still don't!  They also hosted some of the first KING FOR ANOTHER DAY tournaments, with fan HIGH-QUALITY RIPS.


In later years, an event known as GRAND FEST was hosting PREMIERES for GRAND DAD Fantasy, KING FOR ANOTHER DAY, GRANDmachine, HE THICC 69, and MEME Wars, as of 2019.
See, Sliscus was originally just some pencil-pushing something-or-other within [[Commorragh]].  However, he decided that boring shit sucked and stole three ships from Port Carmine and began his personal corsair warband, the "Sky Serpents". And so he's stuck around for a few thousand years, looting and pillaging all over the galaxy, whilst the inquisition sat slack-jawed wondering where their ships went. He became the greatest pirate that ever plied the sea of stars, which must be a testament to his skill as the commander of a legion of backstabbing bastards in his megalomaniacal vision to take over the galaxy behind a [[Abaddon|certain armless failure]], <s>[[God-Emperor of Mankind|a rotting psychic vegetable]]</s> HERESY! {{BLAM}}, [[Necrons|and the Tomb Kings ''IN SPACE'']].


== HIGH-QUALITY RIPS and MEMES ==
Not like that didn't affect his sanity, though.  The guy's got serious moodswings which manage to have some hilarious effects that he might have learned from the legendary [[Assholetep]].  For example, he decided to parlay with some planetary government, and then decided to butcher all of the Hive Nobility because their envoy mispronounced his nameLike an asshole.  Also, to add to his Megalomania, he is pretty paranoid (which makes him ironically perfectly rational for a citizen of Commorragh), feeding himself various poisons to build up his immune system. He also has a thing for wearing different clothes every single day to the point that he'd never wear the same set twice; in the novel "Lukas the Trickster" (where Sliscus is the main antagonist) Sliscus reflects that it's his personal preference, he will wear the same thing more than one day in a row but under protest.  Also every outfit he wears is made of or includes body parts of most recent person he killed.  Apparently his banner is also made from the flayed skin of the Lord Admiral of Segmentum Tempestus' Segmentum Fortress.  Sliscus has also been said to be amused by being called a serpent; he considers himself more dangerous than any animal and thinks that "serpents" should be renamed "Sliscus' " after him instead of the other way around.
Some HIGH-QUALITY RIPS appear to have seen releases or updates in 5th and 6th editionNote that The GRAND DAD EMPIRE seem to have been most active between 2012 and 2019.


* GRAND DAD 2: SPASTIC BOOGALOO
Sliscus is also a Warhammer 40k drug lord.  He has access to all the best combat drugs and poisons, which are reflected in his rules, which buff himself and the army. He's also the second-most pimping Dark Eldar after Asdrubael Vect.  In the 5th edition Dark Eldar "...he has his skin scrubbed thoroughly by teams of concubines every time he shares breathing space with a lesser species." and there are two reasons he's implied to be very popular with the ladies of the Wych cults (and only one of them is his drugs).  So not only does he kill your army, he sweeps your girl off your feet and shows her a better time than you ever gave her.  Again, in the novel about Lukas, Sliscus is revealed to have once conducted a raid on a world from a hot-tub while being serviced by a team of concubines.  This confirms Sliscus to be up there with Illic, Lukas, Vect and Big-E Emperor as one of the biggest ladies' men in 40k. 
* GRAND DAD 3: THE GAUNTLET OF ASS (FEATURING SMOL NOZOMI, TITO DICKMAN, SPONGE, HE THICC, and SANS UNDERTALE)
* GRAND DAD 4: GRAND DAD IS GOD
* GRAND DAD 5: DEATH TO 1D4CHAN


GRAND DAD IS LOVE
The Duke's most well-known engagement was against the [[Space Wolves]], when he organized a raid on Fenris. Inevitably he was forced to quit the planet (his ego got too big and he went after Astartes and learned why no one else is that crazy), after [[Lukas the Trickster]] and his squad bested [[Lady Malys]] and had her lead him to the Duke's camp.  As the Marine pursued the Duke, Sliscus did manage a rare feat for any Xenos, defeating a Space Marine in combat - especially a named character, and cut out one of Lukas' hearts (the only other Xenos who have done this in lore are other named characters such as Lelith, Imotekh, Obyron and the Swarmlord).  Before he could finish slaying Lukas, however, he spat acid in the Duke's face and escaped.
GRAND DAD IS LIFE
 
GRAND DAD WILL CONQUER THIS WIKI
Despite being awesome and a fan favourite, games-workshop decided to cut the Duke from the new edition of the codex, much to the disappointment of Dark Eldar fans, RIP Duke :(
FOR MEMES
 
FOR VINESAUCE
If they ever do a live-action movie of 40k, in lieu of the late David Bowie, Duke Sliscus should be played by Christopher Waltz.
AND FOR
 
SILVAGUNNER
 
[[Category: Meme]][[Category: GRAND DAD]][[Category: GRAND DAD Fantasy]][[Category: Awesome]]
{{template:Dark Eldar-Characters}}
[[Category: Warhammer 40,000]]
[[Category: Dark Eldar]]

Revision as of 12:27, 14 August 2020

Yeah, he's kinda weird like that

The Duke of pirates, Traevelliath Sliscus (Better known as "The Duke" or "Sliscus the Serpent") is the Dark Eldar answer to Prince Yriel as top space pirates, acting as the posterboy for exiled Dark Eldar who want to do what they want 'cuz a pirate is free (a popular theory is that he is Yriels father, given the mystery as to how the Iyanden craftworlder was conceived). He is as talented as a Shakespearean wordsmith, carving epic poetry into his prisoners bodies after injecting them with a buttload of poisons. He is also essentially David Bowie circa 1977.

This is how Lady Malys describes the Duke: "Amoral, despicable and impeccably dressed into the bargain". When other Dark Eldar say that about you, you know you have some serious style.

The closest you'll ever get to a decent image of a Dark Eldar who isn't Vect or Lelith.

See, Sliscus was originally just some pencil-pushing something-or-other within Commorragh. However, he decided that boring shit sucked and stole three ships from Port Carmine and began his personal corsair warband, the "Sky Serpents". And so he's stuck around for a few thousand years, looting and pillaging all over the galaxy, whilst the inquisition sat slack-jawed wondering where their ships went. He became the greatest pirate that ever plied the sea of stars, which must be a testament to his skill as the commander of a legion of backstabbing bastards in his megalomaniacal vision to take over the galaxy behind a certain armless failure, a rotting psychic vegetable HERESY! *BLAM*, and the Tomb Kings IN SPACE.

Not like that didn't affect his sanity, though. The guy's got serious moodswings which manage to have some hilarious effects that he might have learned from the legendary Assholetep. For example, he decided to parlay with some planetary government, and then decided to butcher all of the Hive Nobility because their envoy mispronounced his name. Like an asshole. Also, to add to his Megalomania, he is pretty paranoid (which makes him ironically perfectly rational for a citizen of Commorragh), feeding himself various poisons to build up his immune system. He also has a thing for wearing different clothes every single day to the point that he'd never wear the same set twice; in the novel "Lukas the Trickster" (where Sliscus is the main antagonist) Sliscus reflects that it's his personal preference, he will wear the same thing more than one day in a row but under protest. Also every outfit he wears is made of or includes body parts of most recent person he killed. Apparently his banner is also made from the flayed skin of the Lord Admiral of Segmentum Tempestus' Segmentum Fortress. Sliscus has also been said to be amused by being called a serpent; he considers himself more dangerous than any animal and thinks that "serpents" should be renamed "Sliscus' " after him instead of the other way around.

Sliscus is also a Warhammer 40k drug lord. He has access to all the best combat drugs and poisons, which are reflected in his rules, which buff himself and the army. He's also the second-most pimping Dark Eldar after Asdrubael Vect. In the 5th edition Dark Eldar "...he has his skin scrubbed thoroughly by teams of concubines every time he shares breathing space with a lesser species." and there are two reasons he's implied to be very popular with the ladies of the Wych cults (and only one of them is his drugs). So not only does he kill your army, he sweeps your girl off your feet and shows her a better time than you ever gave her. Again, in the novel about Lukas, Sliscus is revealed to have once conducted a raid on a world from a hot-tub while being serviced by a team of concubines. This confirms Sliscus to be up there with Illic, Lukas, Vect and Big-E Emperor as one of the biggest ladies' men in 40k.

The Duke's most well-known engagement was against the Space Wolves, when he organized a raid on Fenris. Inevitably he was forced to quit the planet (his ego got too big and he went after Astartes and learned why no one else is that crazy), after Lukas the Trickster and his squad bested Lady Malys and had her lead him to the Duke's camp. As the Marine pursued the Duke, Sliscus did manage a rare feat for any Xenos, defeating a Space Marine in combat - especially a named character, and cut out one of Lukas' hearts (the only other Xenos who have done this in lore are other named characters such as Lelith, Imotekh, Obyron and the Swarmlord). Before he could finish slaying Lukas, however, he spat acid in the Duke's face and escaped.

Despite being awesome and a fan favourite, games-workshop decided to cut the Duke from the new edition of the codex, much to the disappointment of Dark Eldar fans, RIP Duke :(

If they ever do a live-action movie of 40k, in lieu of the late David Bowie, Duke Sliscus should be played by Christopher Waltz.


Dark Eldar Lords and Ladies
Asdrubael Vect - Archon Tahril - Baron Sathonyx
Drazhar - Duke Sliscus - Kheradruakh
Lady Malys - Lelith Hesperax - Urien Rakarth