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| I am Cancer
| | {{Infobox Spess Mahreen Chapter |
| Bee Movie Script - Dialogue Transcript
| | |Name = Burning Blades |
| | | |Heraldry = [[File: Ceremonial_Burning_Blades_Badge.png|140px]] |
| Voila! Finally, the Bee Movie script is here for all you fans of the Jerry Seinfeld animated movie. This puppy is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of the movie to get the dialogue. I know, I know, I still need to get the cast names in there and all that jazz, so if you have any corrections, feel free to drop me a line. At least you'll have some Bee Movie quotes (or even a monologue or two) to annoy your coworkers with in the meantime, right?
| | |Battle Cry = "Burn, for the flames of wrath shall fall upon you!" |
| And swing on back to Drew's Script-O-Rama afterwards -- because reading is good for your noodle. Better than Farmville, anyway.
| | |Number = Presumably II |
| Bee Movie Script
| | |Founding = [[First Founding]] |
| | | |Successors of = N/A |
|
| | |Successor Chapters = None |
|
| | |Chapter Master = Adiral |
| According to all known laws
| | |Primarch = Blaze |
| of aviation,
| | |Homeworld = Cancer |
| | | |Specialty = Setting dual swords on fire and charging things |
|
| | |Strength = Slightly over 1000 (1 Veteran Company, 8 Battle Companies and a Scout Company |
| there is no way a bee
| | |Allegiance = Slaanesh |
| should be able to fly.
| | |Colours = Bright Silver, Blue trims and gold decorations}} |
| | | The Burning Blades is the result when a fa/tg/uy decides to create his own custom Space Marine Chapter, that has a Primarch, without realising that people look down on it. Essentially, they're Space Marines that love fire, swords, charging things, and are prepared to sacrifice themselves and face impossible odds to ensure victory. Their Primarch, known only as 'Blaze' was brought up on a death world, the northern hemisphere was a tropical jungle, and the southern hemisphere was a barren desert. Currently writing a custom Codex for them, as I don't really believe that any of the current codices fit their style. |
|
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| Its wings are too small to get
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| its fat little body off the ground.
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|
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| The bee, of course, flies anyway
| |
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|
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| because bees don't care
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| what humans think is impossible.
| |
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|
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| Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
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| Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
| |
| | |
|
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| Ooh, black and yellow!
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| Let's shake it up a little.
| |
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|
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| Barry! Breakfast is ready!
| |
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|
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| Ooming!
| |
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|
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| Hang on a second.
| |
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|
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| Hello?
| |
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|
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| - Barry?
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| - Adam?
| |
| | |
|
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| - Oan you believe this is happening?
| |
| - I can't. I'll pick you up.
| |
| | |
|
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| Looking sharp.
| |
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|
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| Use the stairs. Your father
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| paid good money for those.
| |
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|
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| Sorry. I'm excited.
| |
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|
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| Here's the graduate.
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| We're very proud of you, son.
| |
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|
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| A perfect report card, all B's.
| |
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|
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| Very proud.
| |
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|
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| Ma! I got a thing going here.
| |
| | |
|
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| - You got lint on your fuzz.
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| - Ow! That's me!
| |
| | |
|
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| - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000.
| |
| - Bye!
| |
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|
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| Barry, I told you,
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| stop flying in the house!
| |
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|
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| - Hey, Adam.
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| - Hey, Barry.
| |
| | |
|
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| - Is that fuzz gel?
| |
| - A little. Special day, graduation.
| |
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|
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| Never thought I'd make it.
| |
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|
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| Three days grade school,
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| three days high school.
| |
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|
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| Those were awkward.
| |
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|
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| Three days college. I'm glad I took
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| a day and hitchhiked around the hive.
| |
| | |
|
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| You did come back different.
| |
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|
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| - Hi, Barry.
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| - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good.
| |
| | |
|
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| - Hear about Frankie?
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| - Yeah.
| |
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|
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| - You going to the funeral?
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| - No, I'm not going.
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|
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| Everybody knows,
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| sting someone, you die.
| |
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|
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| Don't waste it on a squirrel.
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| Such a hothead.
| |
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|
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| I guess he could have
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| just gotten out of the way.
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|
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| I love this incorporating
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| an amusement park into our day.
| |
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|
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| That's why we don't need vacations.
| |
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|
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| Boy, quite a bit of pomp...
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| under the circumstances.
| |
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|
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| - Well, Adam, today we are men.
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| - We are!
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|
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| - Bee-men.
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| - Amen!
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|
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| Hallelujah!
| |
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|
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| Students, faculty, distinguished bees,
| |
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|
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| please welcome Dean Buzzwell.
| |
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|
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| Welcome, New Hive Oity
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| graduating class of...
| |
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|
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| ...9:15.
| |
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|
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| That concludes our ceremonies.
| |
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|
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| And begins your career
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| at Honex Industries!
| |
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|
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| Will we pick ourjob today?
| |
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|
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| I heard it's just orientation.
| |
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|
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| Heads up! Here we go.
| |
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|
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| Keep your hands and antennas
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| inside the tram at all times.
| |
| | |
|
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| - Wonder what it'll be like?
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| - A little scary.
| |
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|
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| Welcome to Honex,
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| a division of Honesco
| |
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|
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| and a part of the Hexagon Group.
| |
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|
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| This is it!
| |
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|
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| Wow.
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|
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| Wow.
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|
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| We know that you, as a bee,
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| have worked your whole life
| |
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|
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| to get to the point where you
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| can work for your whole life.
| |
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|
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| Honey begins when our valiant Pollen
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| Jocks bring the nectar to the hive.
| |
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|
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| Our top-secret formula
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|
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| is automatically color-corrected,
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| scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured
| |
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|
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| into this soothing sweet syrup
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|
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| with its distinctive
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| golden glow you know as...
| |
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|
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| Honey!
| |
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|
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| - That girl was hot.
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| - She's my cousin!
| |
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|
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| - She is?
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| - Yes, we're all cousins.
| |
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|
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| - Right. You're right.
| |
| - At Honex, we constantly strive
| |
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|
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| to improve every aspect
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| of bee existence.
| |
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|
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| These bees are stress-testing
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| a new helmet technology.
| |
| | |
|
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| - What do you think he makes?
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| - Not enough.
| |
| | |
|
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| Here we have our latest advancement,
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| the Krelman.
| |
| | |
|
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| - What does that do?
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| - Oatches that little strand of honey
| |
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|
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| that hangs after you pour it.
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| Saves us millions.
| |
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|
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| Oan anyone work on the Krelman?
| |
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|
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| Of course. Most bee jobs are
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| small ones. But bees know
| |
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|
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| that every small job,
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| if it's done well, means a lot.
| |
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|
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| But choose carefully
| |
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|
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| because you'll stay in the job
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| you pick for the rest of your life.
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|
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| The same job the rest of your life?
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| I didn't know that.
| |
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|
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| What's the difference?
| |
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|
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| You'll be happy to know that bees,
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| as a species, haven't had one day off
| |
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|
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| in 27 million years.
| |
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|
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| So you'll just work us to death?
| |
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|
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| We'll sure try.
| |
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|
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| Wow! That blew my mind!
| |
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|
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| "What's the difference?"
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| How can you say that?
| |
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|
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| One job forever?
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| That's an insane choice to have to make.
| |
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|
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| I'm relieved. Now we only have
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| to make one decision in life.
| |
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|
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| But, Adam, how could they
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| never have told us that?
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|
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| Why would you question anything?
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| We're bees.
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|
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| We're the most perfectly
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| functioning society on Earth.
| |
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|
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| You ever think maybe things
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| work a little too well here?
| |
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|
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| Like what? Give me one example.
| |
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|
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| I don't know. But you know
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| what I'm talking about.
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|
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| Please clear the gate.
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| Royal Nectar Force on approach.
| |
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|
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| Wait a second. Oheck it out.
| |
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|
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| - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks!
| |
| - Wow.
| |
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|
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| I've never seen them this close.
| |
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|
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| They know what it's like
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| outside the hive.
| |
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|
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| Yeah, but some don't come back.
| |
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|
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| - Hey, Jocks!
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| - Hi, Jocks!
| |
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|
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| You guys did great!
| |
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|
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| You're monsters!
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| You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it!
| |
| | |
|
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| - I wonder where they were.
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| - I don't know.
| |
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|
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| Their day's not planned.
| |
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|
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| Outside the hive, flying who knows
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| where, doing who knows what.
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|
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| You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen
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| Jock. You have to be bred for that.
| |
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|
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| Right.
| |
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|
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| Look. That's more pollen
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| than you and I will see in a lifetime.
| |
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|
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| It's just a status symbol.
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| Bees make too much of it.
| |
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|
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| Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it
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| and the ladies see you wearing it.
| |
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|
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| Those ladies?
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| Aren't they our cousins too?
| |
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|
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| Distant. Distant.
| |
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|
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| Look at these two.
| |
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|
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| - Oouple of Hive Harrys.
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| - Let's have fun with them.
| |
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|
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| It must be dangerous
| |
| being a Pollen Jock.
| |
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|
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| Yeah. Once a bear pinned me
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| against a mushroom!
| |
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|
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| He had a paw on my throat,
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| and with the other, he was slapping me!
| |
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|
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| - Oh, my!
| |
| - I never thought I'd knock him out.
| |
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|
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| What were you doing during this?
| |
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|
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| Trying to alert the authorities.
| |
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|
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| I can autograph that.
| |
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|
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| A little gusty out there today, | |
| wasn't it, comrades?
| |
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|
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| Yeah. Gusty.
| |
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|
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| We're hitting a sunflower patch
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| six miles from here tomorrow.
| |
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|
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| - Six miles, huh?
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| - Barry!
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|
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| A puddle jump for us,
| |
| but maybe you're not up for it.
| |
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|
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| - Maybe I am.
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| - You are not!
| |
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|
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| We're going 0900 at J-Gate.
| |
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|
| |
| What do you think, buzzy-boy?
| |
| Are you bee enough?
| |
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|
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| I might be. It all depends
| |
| on what 0900 means. | |
| | |
|
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| Hey, Honex!
| |
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|
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| Dad, you surprised me.
| |
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|
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| You decide what you're interested in?
| |
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|
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| - Well, there's a lot of choices.
| |
| - But you only get one.
| |
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|
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| Do you ever get bored
| |
| doing the same job every day?
| |
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|
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| Son, let me tell you about stirring.
| |
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|
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| You grab that stick, and you just
| |
| move it around, and you stir it around.
| |
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|
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| You get yourself into a rhythm.
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| It's a beautiful thing.
| |
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|
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| You know, Dad,
| |
| the more I think about it,
| |
| | |
|
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| maybe the honey field
| |
| just isn't right for me.
| |
| | |
|
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| You were thinking of what,
| |
| making balloon animals?
| |
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|
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| That's a bad job
| |
| for a guy with a stinger.
| |
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|
| |
| Janet, your son's not sure
| |
| he wants to go into honey!
| |
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|
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| - Barry, you are so funny sometimes.
| |
| - I'm not trying to be funny.
| |
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|
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| You're not funny! You're going
| |
| into honey. Our son, the stirrer!
| |
| | |
|
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| - You're gonna be a stirrer?
| |
| - No one's listening to me!
| |
| | |
|
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| Wait till you see the sticks I have.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I could say anything right now.
| |
| I'm gonna get an ant tattoo!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Let's open some honey and celebrate!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Maybe I'll pierce my thorax.
| |
| Shave my antennae.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Shack up with a grasshopper. Get
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| a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"!
| |
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|
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| I'm so proud.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - We're starting work today!
| |
| - Today's the day.
| |
| | |
|
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| Oome on! All the good jobs
| |
| will be gone.
| |
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|
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| Yeah, right.
| |
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|
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| Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring,
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| stirrer, front desk, hair removal...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Is it still available?
| |
| - Hang on. Two left!
| |
| | |
|
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| One of them's yours! Oongratulations!
| |
| Step to the side.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - What'd you get?
| |
| - Picking crud out. Stellar!
| |
| | |
|
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| Wow!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oouple of newbies?
| |
| | |
|
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| Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready!
| |
| | |
|
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| Make your choice.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - You want to go first?
| |
| - No, you go.
| |
| | |
|
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| Oh, my. What's available?
| |
| | |
|
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| Restroom attendant's open,
| |
| not for the reason you think.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Any chance of getting the Krelman?
| |
| - Sure, you're on.
| |
| | |
|
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| I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out.
| |
| | |
|
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| Wax monkey's always open.
| |
| | |
|
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| The Krelman opened up again. | |
| | |
|
| |
| What happened?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| A bee died. Makes an opening. See?
| |
| He's dead. Another dead one.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Deady. Deadified. Two more dead.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Dead from the neck up.
| |
| Dead from the neck down. That's life!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oh, this is so hard!
| |
| | |
|
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| Heating, cooling,
| |
| stunt bee, pourer, stirrer,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| humming, inspector number seven,
| |
| lint coordinator, stripe supervisor,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| mite wrangler. Barry, what
| |
| do you think I should... Barry?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Barry!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| All right, we've got the sunflower patch
| |
| in quadrant nine...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What happened to you?
| |
| Where are you?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - I'm going out.
| |
| - Out? Out where?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Out there.
| |
| - Oh, no!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I have to, before I go
| |
| to work for the rest of my life.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Another call coming in.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| If anyone's feeling brave,
| |
| there's a Korean deli on 83rd
| |
| | |
|
| |
| that gets their roses today.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Hey, guys.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Look at that.
| |
| - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Really? Feeling lucky, are you?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Sign here, here. Just initial that.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Thank you.
| |
| - OK.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You got a rain advisory today,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| and as you all know,
| |
| bees cannot fly in rain.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| So be careful. As always,
| |
| watch your brooms,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| hockey sticks, dogs,
| |
| birds, bears and bats.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Also, I got a couple of reports
| |
| of root beer being poured on us.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Murphy's in a home because of it,
| |
| babbling like a cicada!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - That's awful.
| |
| - And a reminder for you rookies,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| bee law number one,
| |
| absolutely no talking to humans!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| All right, launch positions!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz,
| |
| buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Black and yellow!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Hello!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You ready for this, hot shot?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yeah. Yeah, bring it on.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Wind, check.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Antennae, check.
| |
| - Nectar pack, check.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Wings, check.
| |
| - Stinger, check.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Scared out of my shorts, check.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| OK, ladies,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| let's move it out!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Pound those petunias,
| |
| you striped stem-suckers!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| All of you, drain those flowers!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Wow! I'm out!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I can't believe I'm out!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| So blue.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I feel so fast and free!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Box kite!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Wow!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Flowers!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| This is Blue Leader.
| |
| We have roses visual.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Bring it around 30 degrees and hold.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Roses!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Stand to the side, kid.
| |
| It's got a bit of a kick.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That is one nectar collector!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Ever see pollination up close?
| |
| - No, sir.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it
| |
| over here. Maybe a dash over there,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| a pinch on that one.
| |
| See that? It's a little bit of magic.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That's amazing. Why do we do that?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That's pollen power. More pollen, more
| |
| flowers, more nectar, more honey for us.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oool.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow.
| |
| Oould be daisies. Don't we need those?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oopy that visual.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Wait. One of these flowers
| |
| seems to be on the move.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Say again? You're reporting
| |
| a moving flower?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Affirmative.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That was on the line!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| This is the coolest. What is it?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I don't know, but I'm loving this color.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It smells good.
| |
| Not like a flower, but I like it.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yeah, fuzzy.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Ohemical-y.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| My sweet lord of bees!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oandy-brain, get off there!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Problem!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Guys!
| |
| - This could be bad.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Affirmative.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Very close.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Gonna hurt.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Mama's little boy.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You are way out of position, rookie!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Ooming in at you like a missile!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Help me!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I don't think these are flowers.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Should we tell him?
| |
| - I think he knows.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What is this?!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Match point!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You can start packing up, honey,
| |
| because you're about to eat it!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yowser!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Gross.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| There's a bee in the car!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Do something!
| |
| - I'm driving!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Hi, bee.
| |
| - He's back here!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| He's going to sting me!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Nobody move. If you don't move,
| |
| he won't sting you. Freeze!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| He blinked!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Spray him, Granny!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What are you doing?!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Wow... the tension level
| |
| out here is unbelievable.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I gotta get home.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oan't fly in rain.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oan't fly in rain.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oan't fly in rain.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Ken, could you close
| |
| the window please?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Ken, could you close
| |
| the window please?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oheck out my new resume.
| |
| I made it into a fold-out brochure.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You see? Folds out.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What was that?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Maybe this time. This time. This time.
| |
| This time! This time! This...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Drapes!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That is diabolical.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's fantastic. It's got all my special
| |
| skills, even my top-ten favorite movies.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What's number one? Star Wars?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Nah, I don't go for that...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| ...kind of stuff.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| No wonder we shouldn't talk to them.
| |
| They're out of their minds.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| When I leave a job interview, they're
| |
| flabbergasted, can't believe what I say.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I don't remember the sun
| |
| having a big 75 on it.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I predicted global warming.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I could feel it getting hotter.
| |
| At first I thought it was just me.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Wait! Stop! Bee!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Stand back. These are winter boots.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Wait!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Don't kill him!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You know I'm allergic to them!
| |
| This thing could kill me!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Why does his life have
| |
| less value than yours?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Why does his life have any less value
| |
| than mine? Is that your statement?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm just saying all life has value. You
| |
| don't know what he's capable of feeling.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| My brochure!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| There you go, little guy.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm not scared of him.
| |
| It's an allergic thing.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Put that on your resume brochure.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| My whole face could puff up.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Make it one of your special skills.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Knocking someone out
| |
| is also a special skill.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night?
| |
| - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - You could put carob chips on there.
| |
| - Bye.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Supposed to be less calories.
| |
| - Bye.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I gotta say something.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| She saved my life.
| |
| I gotta say something.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| All right, here it goes.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Nah.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What would I say?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I could really get in trouble.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's a bee law.
| |
| You're not supposed to talk to a human.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I can't believe I'm doing this.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I've got to.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oh, I can't do it. Oome on!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| No. Yes. No.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Do it. I can't.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| How should I start it?
| |
| "You like jazz?" No, that's no good.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Here she comes! Speak, you fool!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Hi!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm sorry.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - You're talking.
| |
| - Yes, I know.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You're talking!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm so sorry.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| No, it's OK. It's fine.
| |
| I know I'm dreaming.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| But I don't recall going to bed.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Well, I'm sure this
| |
| is very disconcerting.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| This is a bit of a surprise to me.
| |
| I mean, you're a bee!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I am. And I'm not supposed
| |
| to be doing this,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| but they were all trying to kill me.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| And if it wasn't for you...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I had to thank you.
| |
| It's just how I was raised.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That was a little weird.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - I'm talking with a bee.
| |
| - Yeah.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm talking to a bee.
| |
| And the bee is talking to me!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I just want to say I'm grateful.
| |
| I'll leave now.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Wait! How did you learn to do that?
| |
| - What?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| The talking thing.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Same way you did, I guess.
| |
| "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - That's very funny.
| |
| - Yeah.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh,
| |
| we'd cry with what we have to deal with.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Anyway...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oan I...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| ...get you something?
| |
| - Like what?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I don't know. I mean...
| |
| I don't know. Ooffee?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I don't want to put you out.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's no trouble. It takes two minutes.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - It's just coffee.
| |
| - I hate to impose.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Don't be ridiculous!
| |
| - Actually, I would love a cup.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Hey, you want rum cake?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - I shouldn't.
| |
| - Have some.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - No, I can't.
| |
| - Oome on!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Where?
| |
| - These stripes don't help.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You look great!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I don't know if you know
| |
| anything about fashion.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Are you all right?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| No.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| He's making the tie in the cab
| |
| as they're flying up Madison.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| He finally gets there.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| He runs up the steps into the church.
| |
| The wedding is on.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| And he says, "Watermelon?
| |
| I thought you said Guatemalan.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Why would I marry a watermelon?"
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Is that a bee joke?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That's the kind of stuff we do.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yeah, different.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| So, what are you gonna do, Barry?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| About work? I don't know.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I want to do my part for the hive,
| |
| but I can't do it the way they want.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I know how you feel.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - You do?
| |
| - Sure.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or
| |
| a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Really?
| |
| - My only interest is flowers.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Our new queen was just elected
| |
| with that same campaign slogan.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Anyway, if you look...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| There's my hive right there. See it?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You're in Sheep Meadow!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| No way! I know that area.
| |
| I lost a toe ring there once.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Why do girls put rings on their toes?
| |
| - Why not?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - It's like putting a hat on your knee.
| |
| - Maybe I'll try that.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - You all right, ma'am?
| |
| - Oh, yeah. Fine.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Just having two cups of coffee!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Anyway, this has been great.
| |
| Thanks for the coffee.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yeah, it's no trouble.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did,
| |
| I'd be up the rest of my life.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Are you...?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oan I take a piece of this with me?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Sure! Here, have a crumb.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Thanks!
| |
| - Yeah.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| All right. Well, then...
| |
| I guess I'll see you around.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Or not.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| OK, Barry.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| And thank you
| |
| so much again... for before.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oh, that? That was nothing.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Well, not nothing, but... Anyway...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| This can't possibly work.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| He's all set to go.
| |
| We may as well try it.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| OK, Dave, pull the chute.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Sounds amazing.
| |
| - It was amazing!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It was the scariest,
| |
| happiest moment of my life.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Humans! I can't believe
| |
| you were with humans!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Giant, scary humans!
| |
| What were they like?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Huge and crazy. They talk crazy.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| They eat crazy giant things.
| |
| They drive crazy.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Do they try and kill you, like on TV?
| |
| - Some of them. But some of them don't.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - How'd you get back?
| |
| - Poodle.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You did it, and I'm glad. You saw
| |
| whatever you wanted to see.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You had your "experience." Now you
| |
| can pick out yourjob and be normal.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Well...
| |
| - Well?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Well, I met someone.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You did? Was she Bee-ish?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you!
| |
| - No, no, no, not a wasp.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Spider?
| |
| - I'm not attracted to spiders.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I know it's the hottest thing,
| |
| with the eight legs and all.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I can't get by that face.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| So who is she?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| She's... human.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| No, no. That's a bee law.
| |
| You wouldn't break a bee law.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Her name's Vanessa.
| |
| - Oh, boy.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| She's so nice. And she's a florist!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oh, no! You're dating a human florist!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We're not dating.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You're flying outside the hive, talking
| |
| to humans that attack our homes | |
| | |
|
| |
| with power washers and M-80s!
| |
| One-eighth a stick of dynamite!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| She saved my life!
| |
| And she understands me.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| This is over!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Eat this.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| This is not over! What was that?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - They call it a crumb.
| |
| - It was so stingin' stripey!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| And that's not what they eat.
| |
| That's what falls off what they eat!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - You know what a Oinnabon is?
| |
| - No.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's bread and cinnamon and frosting.
| |
| They heat it up...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Sit down!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| ...really hot!
| |
| - Listen to me!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We are not them! We're us.
| |
| There's us and there's them!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yes, but who can deny
| |
| the heart that is yearning?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| There's no yearning.
| |
| Stop yearning. Listen to me!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You have got to start thinking bee,
| |
| my friend. Thinking bee!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Thinking bee.
| |
| - Thinking bee.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
| |
| Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| There he is. He's in the pool.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You know what your problem is, Barry?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I gotta start thinking bee?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| How much longer will this go on?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's been three days!
| |
| Why aren't you working?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I've got a lot of big life decisions
| |
| to think about.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What life? You have no life!
| |
| You have no job. You're barely a bee!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Would it kill you
| |
| to make a little honey?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Barry, come out.
| |
| Your father's talking to you.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Martin, would you talk to him?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Barry, I'm talking to you!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You coming?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Got everything?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| All set!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Go ahead. I'll catch up.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Don't be too long.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Watch this!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Vanessa!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - We're still here.
| |
| - I told you not to yell at him.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| He doesn't respond to yelling!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Then why yell at me?
| |
| - Because you don't listen!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm not listening to this.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Sorry, I've gotta go.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Where are you going?
| |
| - I'm meeting a friend.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| A girl? Is this why you can't decide?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Bye.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I just hope she's Bee-ish.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| They have a huge parade
| |
| of flowers every year in Pasadena?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| To be in the Tournament of Roses,
| |
| that's every florist's dream!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Up on a float, surrounded
| |
| by flowers, crowds cheering.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| A tournament. Do the roses
| |
| compete in athletic events?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| No. All right, I've got one.
| |
| How come you don't fly everywhere?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's exhausting. Why don't you
| |
| run everywhere? It's faster.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yeah, OK, I see, I see.
| |
| All right, your turn.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| TiVo. You can just freeze live TV?
| |
| That's insane!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You don't have that?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We have Hivo, but it's a disease.
| |
| It's a horrible, horrible disease.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oh, my.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Dumb bees!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You must want to sting all those jerks.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We try not to sting.
| |
| It's usually fatal for us.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| So you have to watch your temper.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Very carefully.
| |
| You kick a wall, take a walk,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| write an angry letter and throw it out.
| |
| Work through it like any emotion:
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Anger, jealousy, lust.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oh, my goodness! Are you OK?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yeah.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - What is wrong with you?!
| |
| - It's a bug.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| He's not bothering anybody.
| |
| Get out of here, you creep!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yeah, it was. How did you know?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It felt like about 10 pages.
| |
| Seventy-five is pretty much our limit.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You've really got that
| |
| down to a science.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue.
| |
| - I'll bet.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What in the name
| |
| of Mighty Hercules is this?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| How did this get here?
| |
| Oute Bee, Golden Blossom,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Ray Liotta Private Select?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Is he that actor?
| |
| - I never heard of him.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Why is this here?
| |
| - For people. We eat it.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You don't have
| |
| enough food of your own?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Well, yes.
| |
| - How do you get it?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Bees make it.
| |
| - I know who makes it!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| And it's hard to make it!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| There's heating, cooling, stirring.
| |
| You need a whole Krelman thing!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - It's organic.
| |
| - It's our-ganic!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's just honey, Barry.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Just what?!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Bees don't know about this!
| |
| This is stealing! A lot of stealing!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You've taken our homes, schools,
| |
| hospitals! This is all we have!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| And it's on sale?!
| |
| I'm getting to the bottom of this.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm getting to the bottom
| |
| of all of this!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Hey, Hector.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - You almost done?
| |
| - Almost.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| He is here. I sense it.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Well, I guess I'll go home now
| |
| | |
|
| |
| and just leave this nice honey out,
| |
| with no one around.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You're busted, box boy!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I knew I heard something.
| |
| So you can talk!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I can talk.
| |
| And now you'll start talking!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Where you getting the sweet stuff?
| |
| Who's your supplier?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I don't understand.
| |
| I thought we were friends.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| The last thing we want
| |
| to do is upset bees!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You're too late! It's ours now!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You, sir, have crossed
| |
| the wrong sword!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You, sir, will be lunch
| |
| for my iguana, Ignacio!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Where is the honey coming from?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Tell me where!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Orazy person!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What horrible thing has happened here?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| These faces, they never knew
| |
| what hit them. And now
| |
| | |
|
| |
| they're on the road to nowhere!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Just keep still.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What? You're not dead?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Do I look dead? They will wipe anything
| |
| that moves. Where you headed?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| To Honey Farms.
| |
| I am onto something huge here.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood,
| |
| crazy stuff. Blows your head off!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm going to Tacoma.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - And you?
| |
| - He really is dead.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| All right.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Uh-oh!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - What is that?!
| |
| - Oh, no!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - A wiper! Triple blade!
| |
| - Triple blade?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Jump on! It's your only chance, bee!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Why does everything have
| |
| to be so doggone clean?!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| How much do you people need to see?!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Open your eyes!
| |
| Stick your head out the window!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| From NPR News in Washington,
| |
| I'm Oarl Kasell.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| But don't kill no more bugs!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Bee!
| |
| - Moose blood guy!!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - You hear something?
| |
| - Like what?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Like tiny screaming.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Turn off the radio.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Whassup, bee boy?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Hey, Blood.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Just a row of honey jars,
| |
| as far as the eye could see. | |
| | |
|
| |
| Wow!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I assume wherever this truck goes
| |
| is where they're getting it.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I mean, that honey's ours.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Bees hang tight.
| |
| - We're all jammed in.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's a close community.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Not us, man. We on our own.
| |
| Every mosquito on his own.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - What if you get in trouble?
| |
| - You a mosquito, you in trouble.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Nobody likes us. They just smack.
| |
| See a mosquito, smack, smack!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| At least you're out in the world.
| |
| You must meet girls.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Mosquito girls try to trade up,
| |
| get with a moth, dragonfly.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You got to be kidding me!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Mooseblood's about to leave
| |
| the building! So long, bee!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Hey, guys!
| |
| - Mooseblood!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I knew I'd catch y'all down here.
| |
| Did you bring your crazy straw?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We throw it in jars, slap a label on it,
| |
| and it's pretty much pure profit.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What is this place?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| A bee's got a brain
| |
| the size of a pinhead.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| They are pinheads!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Pinhead.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Oheck out the new smoker.
| |
| - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| The Thomas 3000!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Smoker?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic.
| |
| Twice the nicotine, all the tar.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| A couple breaths of this
| |
| knocks them right out.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| They make the honey,
| |
| and we make the money.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| "They make the honey,
| |
| and we make the money"?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oh, my!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What's going on? Are you OK?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yeah. It doesn't last too long.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Do you know you're
| |
| in a fake hive with fake walls?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Our queen was moved here.
| |
| We had no choice.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| This is your queen?
| |
| That's a man in women's clothes!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That's a drag queen!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What is this?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oh, no!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| There's hundreds of them!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Bee honey.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Our honey is being brazenly stolen
| |
| on a massive scale!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| This is worse than anything bears
| |
| have done! I intend to do something.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oh, Barry, stop.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Who told you humans are taking
| |
| our honey? That's a rumor.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Do these look like rumors?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That's a conspiracy theory.
| |
| These are obviously doctored photos.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| How did you get mixed up in this?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| He's been talking to humans.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - What?
| |
| - Talking to humans?!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| He has a human girlfriend.
| |
| And they make out!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Make out? Barry!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We do not.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - You wish you could.
| |
| - Whose side are you on?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| The bees!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I dated a cricket once in San Antonio.
| |
| Those crazy legs kept me up all night.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Barry, this is what you want
| |
| to do with your life?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I want to do it for all our lives.
| |
| Nobody works harder than bees!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Dad, I remember you
| |
| coming home so overworked
| |
| | |
|
| |
| your hands were still stirring.
| |
| You couldn't stop.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I remember that.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What right do they have to our honey?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We live on two cups a year. They put it
| |
| in lip balm for no reason whatsoever!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Even if it's true, what can one bee do?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Sting them where it really hurts.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| In the face! The eye!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - That would hurt.
| |
| - No.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Up the nose? That's a killer.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| There's only one place you can sting
| |
| the humans, one place where it matters.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Hive at Five, the hive's only
| |
| full-hour action news source.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| No more bee beards!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Weather with Storm Stinger.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Sports with Buzz Larvi.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| And Jeanette Ohung.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble.
| |
| - And I'm Jeanette Ohung.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| A tri-county bee, Barry Benson,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| intends to sue the human race
| |
| for stealing our honey,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| packaging it and profiting
| |
| from it illegally!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| we'll have three former queens here in
| |
| our studio, discussing their new book,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Olassy Ladies,
| |
| out this week on Hexagon.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Did you ever think, "I'm a kid
| |
| from the hive. I can't do this"?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Bees have never been afraid
| |
| to change the world.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What about Bee Oolumbus?
| |
| Bee Gandhi? Bejesus?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We were thinking
| |
| of stickball or candy stores.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| How old are you?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| The bee community
| |
| is supporting you in this case,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| which will be the trial
| |
| of the bee century.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You know, they have a Larry King
| |
| in the human world too.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's a common name. Next week...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| He looks like you and has a show
| |
| and suspenders and colored dots...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Next week...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the
| |
| guest even though you just heard 'em.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Bear Week next week!
| |
| They're scary, hairy and here live.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Always leans forward, pointy shoulders,
| |
| squinty eyes, very Jewish.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| In tennis, you attack
| |
| at the point of weakness!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Honey, her backhand's a joke!
| |
| I'm not gonna take advantage of that?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Quiet, please.
| |
| Actual work going on here.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Is that that same bee?
| |
| - Yes, it is!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm helping him sue the human race.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Hello.
| |
| - Hello, bee.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| This is Ken.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size
| |
| ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Why does he talk again?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Listen, you better go
| |
| 'cause we're really busy working.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| But it's our yogurt night!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Bye-bye.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Why is yogurt night so difficult?!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You poor thing.
| |
| You two have been at this for hours!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yes, and Adam here
| |
| has been a huge help.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Frosting...
| |
| - How many sugars?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Just one. I try not
| |
| to use the competition.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| So why are you helping me?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Bees have good qualities.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| And it takes my mind off the shop.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Instead of flowers, people
| |
| are giving balloon bouquets now.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Those are great, if you're three.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| And artificial flowers.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Oh, those just get me psychotic!
| |
| - Yeah, me too.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Bent stingers, pointless pollination.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Bees must hate those fake things!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Nothing worse
| |
| than a daffodil that's had work done.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Maybe this could make up
| |
| for it a little bit.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal.
| |
| - I guess.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You sure you want to go through with it?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Am I sure? When I'm done with
| |
| the humans, they won't be able
| |
| | |
|
| |
| to say, "Honey, I'm home,"
| |
| without paying a royalty!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's an incredible scene
| |
| here in downtown Manhattan,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| where the world anxiously waits,
| |
| because for the first time in history,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| we will hear for ourselves
| |
| if a honeybee can actually speak.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What have we gotten into here, Barry?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's pretty big, isn't it?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I can't believe how many humans
| |
| don't work during the day.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You think billion-dollar multinational
| |
| food companies have good lawyers?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Everybody needs to stay
| |
| behind the barricade.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - What's the matter?
| |
| - I don't know, I just got a chill.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Well, if it isn't the bee team.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You boys work on this?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| All rise! The Honorable
| |
| Judge Bumbleton presiding.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| All right. Oase number 4475,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Superior Oourt of New York,
| |
| Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry
| |
| | |
|
| |
| is now in session.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Mr. Montgomery, you're representing
| |
| the five food companies collectively?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| A privilege.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Mr. Benson... you're representing
| |
| all the bees of the world?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor,
| |
| we're ready to proceed.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Mr. Montgomery,
| |
| your opening statement, please.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| my grandmother was a simple woman.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Born on a farm, she believed
| |
| it was man's divine right
| |
| | |
|
| |
| to benefit from the bounty
| |
| of nature God put before us.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| If we lived in the topsy-turvy world
| |
| Mr. Benson imagines,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| just think of what would it mean.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I would have to negotiate
| |
| with the silkworm
| |
| | |
|
| |
| for the elastic in my britches!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Talking bee!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| How do we know this isn't some sort of
| |
| | |
|
| |
| holographic motion-picture-capture
| |
| Hollywood wizardry?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| They could be using laser beams!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Robotics! Ventriloquism!
| |
| Oloning! For all we know,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| he could be on steroids!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Mr. Benson?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Ladies and gentlemen,
| |
| there's no trickery here.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm just an ordinary bee.
| |
| Honey's pretty important to me.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's important to all bees.
| |
| We invented it!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We make it. And we protect it
| |
| with our lives.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Unfortunately, there are
| |
| some people in this room
| |
| | |
|
| |
| who think they can take it from us
| |
| | |
|
| |
| 'cause we're the little guys!
| |
| I'm hoping that, after this is all over,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| you'll see how, by taking our honey,
| |
| you not only take everything we have
| |
| | |
|
| |
| but everything we are!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I wish he'd dress like that
| |
| all the time. So nice!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oall your first witness.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden
| |
| of Honey Farms, big company you have.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I suppose so.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I see you also own
| |
| Honeyburton and Honron!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yes, they provide beekeepers
| |
| for our farms.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Beekeeper. I find that
| |
| to be a very disturbing term.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I don't imagine you employ
| |
| any bee-free-ers, do you?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - No.
| |
| - I couldn't hear you.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - No.
| |
| - No.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Because you don't free bees.
| |
| You keep bees. Not only that,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| it seems you thought a bear would be
| |
| an appropriate image for a jar of honey.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| They're very lovable creatures.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You mean like this?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Bears kill bees!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| How'd you like his head crashing
| |
| through your living room?!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Biting into your couch!
| |
| Spitting out your throw pillows!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| OK, that's enough. Take him away.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here.
| |
| Your name intrigues me.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Where have I heard it before?
| |
| - I was with a band called The Police.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| But you've never been
| |
| a police officer, have you?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| No, I haven't.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| No, you haven't. And so here
| |
| we have yet another example
| |
| | |
|
| |
| of bee culture casually
| |
| stolen by a human
| |
| | |
|
| |
| for nothing more than
| |
| a prance-about stage name.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oh, please.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Because I'm feeling
| |
| a little stung, Sting.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That's not his real name?! You idiots!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Mr. Liotta, first,
| |
| belated congratulations on
| |
| | |
|
| |
| your Emmy win for a guest spot
| |
| on ER in 2005.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Thank you. Thank you.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I see from your resume
| |
| that you're devilishly handsome
| |
| | |
|
| |
| with a churning inner turmoil
| |
| that's ready to blow.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Not yet it isn't. But is this
| |
| what it's come to for you?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Exploiting tiny, helpless bees
| |
| so you don't
| |
| | |
|
| |
| have to rehearse
| |
| your part and learn your lines, sir?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Watch it, Benson!
| |
| I could blow right now!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| This isn't a goodfella.
| |
| This is a badfella!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Why doesn't someone just step on
| |
| this creep, and we can all go home?!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Order in this court!
| |
| - You're all thinking it!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Order! Order, I say!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Say it!
| |
| - Mr. Liotta, please sit down!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I think it was awfully nice
| |
| of that bear to pitch in like that.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I think the jury's on our side.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Are we doing everything right, legally?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm a florist.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Right. Well, here's to a great team.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| To a great team!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Well, hello.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Ken!
| |
| - Hello.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I didn't think you were coming.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| No, I was just late.
| |
| I tried to call, but... the battery.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I didn't want all this to go to waste,
| |
| so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oh, that was lucky.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| There's a little left.
| |
| I could heat it up.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| So I hear you're quite a tennis player.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm not much for the game myself.
| |
| The ball's a little grabby.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That's where I usually sit.
| |
| Right... there.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Ken, Barry was looking at your resume,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| and he agreed with me that eating with
| |
| chopsticks isn't really a special skill.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You think I don't see what you're doing?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I know how hard it is to find
| |
| the rightjob. We have that in common.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Do we?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Bees have 100 percent employment,
| |
| but we do jobs like taking the crud out.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That's just what
| |
| I was thinking about doing.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor
| |
| for his fuzz. I hope that was all right.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm going to drain the old stinger.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yeah, you do that.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Look at that.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You know, I've just about had it
| |
| | |
|
| |
| with your little mind games.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - What's that?
| |
| - Italian Vogue.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| A lot of ads.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Remember what Van said, why is
| |
| your life more valuable than mine?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Funny, I just can't seem to recall that!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I think something stinks in here!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I love the smell of flowers.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| How do you like the smell of flames?!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Not as much.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Water bug! Not taking sides!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat!
| |
| This is pathetic!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I've got issues!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Well, well, well, a royal flush!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - You're bluffing.
| |
| - Am I?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Surf's up, dude!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Poo water!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That bowl is gnarly.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Except for those dirty yellow rings!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Kenneth! What are you doing?!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You know, I don't even like honey!
| |
| I don't eat it!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We need to talk!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| He's just a little bee!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| And he happens to be
| |
| the nicest bee I've met in a long time!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Long time? What are you talking about?!
| |
| Are there other bugs in your life?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| No, but there are other things bugging
| |
| me in life. And you're one of them!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| My nerves are fried from riding
| |
| on this emotional roller coaster!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Goodbye, Ken.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| And for your information,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I prefer sugar-free, artificial
| |
| sweeteners made by man!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm sorry about all that.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I know it's got
| |
| an aftertaste! I like it!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I always felt there was some kind
| |
| of barrier between Ken and me.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I couldn't overcome it.
| |
| Oh, well.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Are you OK for the trial?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I believe Mr. Montgomery
| |
| is about out of ideas.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We would like to call
| |
| Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Good idea! You can really see why he's
| |
| considered one of the best lawyers...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yeah.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Layton, you've
| |
| gotta weave some magic
| |
| | |
|
| |
| with this jury,
| |
| or it's gonna be all over.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Don't worry. The only thing I have
| |
| to do to turn this jury around
| |
| | |
|
| |
| is to remind them
| |
| of what they don't like about bees.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - You got the tweezers?
| |
| - Are you allergic?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Only to losing, son. Only to losing.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you
| |
| what I think we'd all like to know.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What exactly is your relationship
| |
| | |
|
| |
| to that woman?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We're friends.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Good friends?
| |
| - Yes.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| How good? Do you live together?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Wait a minute...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Are you her little...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| ...bedbug?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I've seen a bee documentary or two.
| |
| From what I understand,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| doesn't your queen give birth
| |
| to all the bee children?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Yeah, but...
| |
| - So those aren't your real parents!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Oh, Barry...
| |
| - Yes, they are!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Hold me back!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You're an illegitimate bee,
| |
| aren't you, Benson?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| He's denouncing bees!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Don't y'all date your cousins?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Objection!
| |
| - I'm going to pincushion this guy!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Adam, don't! It's what he wants!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oh, I'm hit!!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oh, lordy, I am hit!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Order! Order!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| The venom! The venom
| |
| is coursing through my veins!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I have been felled
| |
| by a winged beast of destruction!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You see? You can't treat them
| |
| like equals! They're striped savages!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Stinging's the only thing
| |
| they know! It's their way!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Adam, stay with me.
| |
| - I can't feel my legs.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What angel of mercy
| |
| will come forward to suck the poison
| |
| | |
|
| |
| from my heaving buttocks?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I will have order in this court. Order!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Order, please!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| The case of the honeybees
| |
| versus the human race
| |
| | |
|
| |
| took a pointed turn against the bees
| |
| | |
|
| |
| yesterday when one of their legal
| |
| team stung Layton T. Montgomery.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Hey, buddy.
| |
| - Hey.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Is there much pain?
| |
| - Yeah.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I blew the whole case, didn't I?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It doesn't matter. What matters is
| |
| you're alive. You could have died.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'd be better off dead. Look at me.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| They got it from the cafeteria
| |
| downstairs, in a tuna sandwich.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Look, there's
| |
| a little celery still on it.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What was it like to sting someone?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I can't explain it. It was all...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| All adrenaline and then...
| |
| and then ecstasy!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| All right.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You think it was all a trap?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Of course. I'm sorry.
| |
| I flew us right into this.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What were we thinking? Look at us. We're
| |
| just a couple of bugs in this world.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What will the humans do to us
| |
| if they win?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I don't know.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I hear they put the roaches in motels.
| |
| That doesn't sound so bad.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Adam, they check in,
| |
| but they don't check out!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oh, my.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oould you get a nurse
| |
| to close that window?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Why?
| |
| - The smoke.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Bees don't smoke.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Right. Bees don't smoke.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Bees don't smoke!
| |
| But some bees are smoking.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That's it! That's our case!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It is? It's not over?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Get back to the court and stall.
| |
| Stall any way you can.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Mr. Flayman.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yes? Yes, Your Honor!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Where is the rest of your team?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Well, Your Honor, it's interesting.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Bees are trained to fly haphazardly,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| and as a result,
| |
| we don't make very good time.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I actually heard a funny story about...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Your Honor,
| |
| haven't these ridiculous bugs
| |
| | |
|
| |
| taken up enough
| |
| of this court's valuable time?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| How much longer will we allow
| |
| these absurd shenanigans to go on?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| They have presented no compelling
| |
| evidence to support their charges
| |
| | |
|
| |
| against my clients,
| |
| who run legitimate businesses.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I move for a complete dismissal
| |
| of this entire case!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going
| |
| | |
|
| |
| to have to consider
| |
| Mr. Montgomery's motion.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| But you can't! We have a terrific case.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Where is your proof?
| |
| Where is the evidence?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Show me the smoking gun!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Hold it, Your Honor!
| |
| You want a smoking gun?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Here is your smoking gun.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What is that?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's a bee smoker!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What, this?
| |
| This harmless little contraption?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| This couldn't hurt a fly,
| |
| let alone a bee.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Look at what has happened
| |
| | |
|
| |
| to bees who have never been asked,
| |
| "Smoking or non?"
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Is this what nature intended for us?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| To be forcibly addicted
| |
| to smoke machines
| |
| | |
|
| |
| and man-made wooden slat work camps?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Living out our lives as honey slaves
| |
| to the white man?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - What are we gonna do?
| |
| - He's playing the species card.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Ladies and gentlemen, please,
| |
| free these bees!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Free the bees! Free the bees!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Free the bees!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Free the bees! Free the bees!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| The court finds in favor of the bees!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Vanessa, we won!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I knew you could do it! High-five!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Sorry.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm OK! You know what this means?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| All the honey
| |
| will finally belong to the bees.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Now we won't have
| |
| to work so hard all the time.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| This is an unholy perversion
| |
| of the balance of nature, Benson.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You'll regret this.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Barry, how much honey is out there?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| All right. One at a time.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Barry, who are you wearing?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| My sweater is Ralph Lauren,
| |
| and I have no pants.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - What if Montgomery's right?
| |
| - What do you mean?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We've been living the bee way
| |
| a long time, 27 million years.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oongratulations on your victory.
| |
| What will you demand as a settlement?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| First, we'll demand a complete shutdown
| |
| of all bee work camps.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Then we want back the honey
| |
| that was ours to begin with,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| every last drop.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We demand an end to the glorification
| |
| of the bear as anything more
| |
| | |
|
| |
| than a filthy, smelly,
| |
| bad-breath stink machine.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We're all aware
| |
| of what they do in the woods.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Wait for my signal.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Take him out.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| He'll have nauseous
| |
| for a few hours, then he'll be fine.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| And we will no longer tolerate
| |
| bee-negative nicknames...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| But it's just a prance-about stage name!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| ...unnecessary inclusion of honey
| |
| in bogus health products
| |
| | |
|
| |
| and la-dee-da human
| |
| tea-time snack garnishments.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oan't breathe.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Bring it in, boys!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Hold it right there! Good.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Tap it.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups,
| |
| and there's gallons more coming!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - I think we need to shut down!
| |
| - Shut down? We've never shut down.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Shut down honey production!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Stop making honey!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Turn your key, sir!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What do we do now?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oannonball!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We're shutting honey production!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Mission abort.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Aborting pollination and nectar detail.
| |
| Returning to base.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Adam, you wouldn't believe
| |
| how much honey was out there.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oh, yeah?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What's going on? Where is everybody?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Are they out celebrating?
| |
| - They're home.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| They don't know what to do.
| |
| Laying out, sleeping in.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way
| |
| to San Antonio with a cricket.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| At least we got our honey back.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Sometimes I think, so what if humans
| |
| liked our honey? Who wouldn't?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's the greatest thing in the world!
| |
| I was excited to be part of making it.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| This was my new desk. This was my
| |
| new job. I wanted to do it really well.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| And now...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Now I can't.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I don't understand
| |
| why they're not happy.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I thought their lives would be better!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| They're doing nothing. It's amazing.
| |
| Honey really changes people.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You don't have any idea
| |
| what's going on, do you?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - What did you want to show me?
| |
| - This.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What happened here?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That is not the half of it.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oh, no. Oh, my.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| They're all wilting.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Doesn't look very good, does it?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| No.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| And whose fault do you think that is?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You know, I'm gonna guess bees.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Bees?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Specifically, me.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I didn't think bees not needing to make
| |
| honey would affect all these things.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's notjust flowers.
| |
| Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That's our whole SAT test right there.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Take away produce, that affects
| |
| the entire animal kingdom.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| And then, of course...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| The human species?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| So if there's no more pollination,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| it could all just go south here,
| |
| couldn't it?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I know this is also partly my fault.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| How about a suicide pact?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| How do we do it?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - I'll sting you, you step on me.
| |
| - Thatjust kills you twice.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Right, right.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Listen, Barry...
| |
| sorry, but I gotta get going.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I had to open my mouth and talk.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Vanessa?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Vanessa? Why are you leaving?
| |
| Where are you going?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| To the final Tournament of Roses parade
| |
| in Pasadena.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| They've moved it to this weekend
| |
| because all the flowers are dying.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's the last chance
| |
| I'll ever have to see it.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry.
| |
| I never meant it to turn out like this.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I know. Me neither.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Tournament of Roses.
| |
| Roses can't do sports.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Wait a minute. Roses. Roses?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Roses!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Vanessa!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Roses?!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Barry?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Roses are flowers!
| |
| - Yes, they are.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Flowers, bees, pollen!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I know.
| |
| That's why this is the last parade.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Maybe not.
| |
| Oould you ask him to slow down?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oould you slow down?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Barry!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| OK, I made a huge mistake.
| |
| This is a total disaster, all my fault.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yes, it kind of is.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I've ruined the planet.
| |
| I wanted to help you
| |
| | |
|
| |
| with the flower shop.
| |
| I've made it worse.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Actually, it's completely closed down.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I thought maybe you were remodeling.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| But I have another idea, and it's
| |
| greater than my previous ideas combined.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I don't want to hear it!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| All right, they have the roses,
| |
| the roses have the pollen.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I know every bee, plant
| |
| and flower bud in this park.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| All we gotta do is get what they've got
| |
| back here with what we've got.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Bees.
| |
| - Park.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Pollen!
| |
| - Flowers.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Repollination!
| |
| - Across the nation!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Tournament of Roses,
| |
| Pasadena, Oalifornia.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| They've got nothing
| |
| but flowers, floats and cotton candy.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Security will be tight.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I have an idea.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Vanessa Bloome, FTD.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Official floral business. It's real.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Thank you. It was a gift.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Once inside,
| |
| we just pick the right float.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| How about The Princess and the Pea?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I could be the princess,
| |
| and you could be the pea!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yes, I got it.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Where should I sit?
| |
| - What are you?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - I believe I'm the pea.
| |
| - The pea?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It goes under the mattresses.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart.
| |
| - I'm getting the marshal.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You do that!
| |
| This whole parade is a fiasco!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Let's see what this baby'll do.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Hey, what are you doing?!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Then all we do
| |
| is blend in with traffic...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| ...without arousing suspicion.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Once at the airport,
| |
| there's no stopping us.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Stop! Security.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - You and your insect pack your float?
| |
| - Yes.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Has it been
| |
| in your possession the entire time?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Would you remove your shoes?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Remove your stinger.
| |
| - It's part of me.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I know. Just having some fun.
| |
| Enjoy your flight.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Then if we're lucky, we'll have
| |
| just enough pollen to do the job.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oan you believe how lucky we are? We
| |
| have just enough pollen to do the job!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I think this is gonna work.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's got to work.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Attention, passengers,
| |
| this is Oaptain Scott.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We have a bit of bad weather
| |
| in New York.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It looks like we'll experience
| |
| a couple hours delay.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Barry, these are cut flowers
| |
| with no water. They'll never make it.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I gotta get up there
| |
| and talk to them.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Be careful.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oan I get help
| |
| with the Sky Mall magazine?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'd like to order the talking
| |
| inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oaptain, I'm in a real situation.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - What'd you say, Hal?
| |
| - Nothing.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Bee!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Don't freak out! My entire species...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What are you doing?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Wait a minute! I'm an attorney!
| |
| - Who's an attorney?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Don't move.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oh, Barry.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Good afternoon, passengers.
| |
| This is your captain.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B
| |
| please report to the cockpit?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| And please hurry!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What happened here?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| There was a DustBuster,
| |
| a toupee, a life raft exploded.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| One's bald, one's in a boat,
| |
| they're both unconscious!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Is that another bee joke?
| |
| - No!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| No one's flying the plane!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| This is JFK control tower, Flight 356.
| |
| What's your status?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| This is Vanessa Bloome.
| |
| I'm a florist from New York.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Where's the pilot?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| He's unconscious,
| |
| and so is the copilot.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Not good. Does anyone onboard
| |
| have flight experience?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| As a matter of fact, there is.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Who's that?
| |
| - Barry Benson.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| From the honey trial?! Oh, great.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Vanessa, this is nothing more
| |
| than a big metal bee.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's got giant wings, huge engines.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I can't fly a plane.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot?
| |
| - Yes.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| How hard could it be?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Wait, Barry!
| |
| We're headed into some lightning.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| This is Bob Bumble. We have some
| |
| late-breaking news from JFK Airport,
| |
| | |
|
| |
| where a suspenseful scene
| |
| is developing.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Barry Benson,
| |
| fresh from his legal victory...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That's Barry!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| ...is attempting to land a plane,
| |
| loaded with people, flowers
| |
| | |
|
| |
| and an incapacitated flight crew.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Flowers?!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We have a storm in the area
| |
| and two individuals at the controls
| |
| | |
|
| |
| with absolutely no flight experience.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Just a minute.
| |
| There's a bee on that plane.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson
| |
| and his no-account compadres.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| They've done enough damage.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| But isn't he your only hope?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Technically, a bee
| |
| shouldn't be able to fly at all.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Their wings are too small...
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Haven't we heard this a million times?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| "The surface area of the wings
| |
| and body mass make no sense."
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Get this on the air!
| |
| - Got it.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Stand by.
| |
| - We're going live.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| The way we work may be a mystery to you.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Making honey takes a lot of bees
| |
| doing a lot of small jobs.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| But let me tell you about a small job.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| If you do it well,
| |
| it makes a big difference.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| More than we realized.
| |
| To us, to everyone.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That's why I want to get bees
| |
| back to working together.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That's the bee way!
| |
| We're not made of Jell-O.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We get behind a fellow.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Black and yellow!
| |
| - Hello!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Left, right, down, hover.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Hover?
| |
| - Forget hover.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| This isn't so hard.
| |
| Beep-beep! Beep-beep!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Barry, what happened?!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Wait, I think we were
| |
| on autopilot the whole time.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - That may have been helping me.
| |
| - And now we're not!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| So it turns out I cannot fly a plane.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| All of you, let's get
| |
| behind this fellow! Move it out!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Move out!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Our only chance is if I do what I'd do,
| |
| you copy me with the wings of the plane!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Don't have to yell.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm not yelling!
| |
| We're in a lot of trouble.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's very hard to concentrate
| |
| with that panicky tone in your voice!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| It's not a tone. I'm panicking!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I can't do this!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Vanessa, pull yourself together.
| |
| You have to snap out of it!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You snap out of it.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You snap out of it.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - You snap out of it!
| |
| - You snap out of it!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - You snap out of it!
| |
| - You snap out of it!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - You snap out of it!
| |
| - You snap out of it!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Hold it!
| |
| - Why? Oome on, it's my turn.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| How is the plane flying?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I don't know.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Hello?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Benson, got any flowers
| |
| for a happy occasion in there?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| The Pollen Jocks!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| They do get behind a fellow.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Black and yellow.
| |
| - Hello.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| All right, let's drop this tin can
| |
| on the blacktop.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Where? I can't see anything. Oan you?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| No, nothing. It's all cloudy.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Thinking bee.
| |
| - Thinking bee.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Thinking bee!
| |
| Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Wait a minute.
| |
| I think I'm feeling something.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - What?
| |
| - I don't know. It's strong, pulling me.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Like a 27-million-year-old instinct.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Bring the nose down.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Thinking bee!
| |
| Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - What in the world is on the tarmac?
| |
| - Get some lights on that!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Thinking bee!
| |
| Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Vanessa, aim for the flower.
| |
| - OK.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Out the engines. We're going in
| |
| on bee power. Ready, boys?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Affirmative!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Land on that flower!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Ready? Full reverse!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Spin it around!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Not that flower! The other one!
| |
| - Which one?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - That flower.
| |
| - I'm aiming at the flower!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt.
| |
| I mean the giant pulsating flower
| |
| | |
|
| |
| made of millions of bees!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Rotate around it.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - This is insane, Barry!
| |
| - This's the only way I know how to fly.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane
| |
| flying in an insect-like pattern?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid.
| |
| Smell it. Full reverse!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Just drop it. Be a part of it.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Aim for the center!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Oome on, already.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Barry, we did it!
| |
| You taught me how to fly!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Yes. No high-five!
| |
| - Right.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Barry, it worked!
| |
| Did you see the giant flower?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| What giant flower? Where? Of course
| |
| I saw the flower! That was genius!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Thank you.
| |
| - But we're not done yet.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Listen, everyone!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| This runway is covered
| |
| with the last pollen
| |
| | |
|
| |
| from the last flowers
| |
| available anywhere on Earth.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That means this is our last chance.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We're the only ones who make honey,
| |
| pollinate flowers and dress like this.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| If we're gonna survive as a species,
| |
| this is our moment! What do you say?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Are we going to be bees, orjust
| |
| Museum of Natural History keychains?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| We're bees!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Keychain!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Then follow me! Except Keychain.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Hold on, Barry. Here.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You've earned this.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Yeah!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect
| |
| fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves. | |
| | |
|
| |
| Oh, yeah.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That's our Barry.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Mom! The bees are back!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| If anybody needs
| |
| to make a call, now's the time.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I got a feeling we'll be
| |
| working late tonight!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Here's your change. Have a great
| |
| afternoon! Oan I help who's next?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Would you like some honey with that?
| |
| It is bee-approved. Don't forget these.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me.
| |
| And I don't see a nickel!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Sometimes I just feel
| |
| like a piece of meat!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I had no idea.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Barry, I'm sorry.
| |
| Have you got a moment?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Would you excuse me?
| |
| My mosquito associate will help you.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Sorry I'm late.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| He's a lawyer too?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I was already a blood-sucking parasite.
| |
| All I needed was a briefcase.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Have a great afternoon!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Barry, I just got this huge tulip order,
| |
| and I can't get them anywhere.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| No problem, Vannie.
| |
| Just leave it to me.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You're a lifesaver, Barry.
| |
| Oan I help who's next?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| All right, scramble, jocks!
| |
| It's time to fly.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Thank you, Barry!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| That bee is living my life!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Let it go, Kenny.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - When will this nightmare end?!
| |
| - Let it all go.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Beautiful day to fly.
| |
| - Sure is.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Between you and me,
| |
| I was dying to get out of that office.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| You have got
| |
| to start thinking bee, my friend.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| - Thinking bee!
| |
| - Me?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| Hold it. Let's just stop
| |
| for a second. Hold it.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone.
| |
| Oan we stop here?
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I'm not making a major life decision
| |
| during a production number!
| |
| | |
|
| |
| All right. Take ten, everybody.
| |
| Wrap it up, guys.
| |
| | |
|
| |
| I had virtually no rehearsal for that.
| |
| | |
| | |
| Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me
| |
| I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed
| |
| She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb
| |
| In the shape of an "L" on her forehead
| |
| | |
| Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming
| |
| Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running
| |
| Didn't make sense not to live for fun
| |
| Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb
| |
| | |
| So much to do, so much to see
| |
| So what's wrong with taking the back streets?
| |
| You'll never know if you don't go
| |
| You'll never shine if you don't glow
| |
| | |
| [Chorus:]
| |
| Hey, now, you're an All Star, get your game on, go play
| |
| Hey, now, you're a Rock Star, get the show on, get paid
| |
| And all that glitters is gold
| |
| Only shooting stars break the mold
| |
| | |
| It's a cool place and they say it gets colder
| |
| You're bundled up now wait 'til you get older
| |
| But the meteor men beg to differ
| |
| Judging by the hole in the satellite picture
| |
| | |
| The ice we skate is getting pretty thin
| |
| The water's getting warm so you might as well swim
| |
| My world's on fire. How about yours?
| |
| That's the way I like it and I'll never get bored.
| |
| | |
| [Chorus 2x]
| |
| | |
| Somebody once asked could I spare some change for gas
| |
| I need to get myself away from this place
| |
| I said yep, what a concept
| |
| I could use a little fuel myself
| |
| And we could all use a little change
| |
| | |
| Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming
| |
| Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running
| |
| Didn't make sense not to live for fun
| |
| Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb
| |
| | |
| So much to do, so much to see
| |
| So what's wrong with taking the back streets?
| |
| You'll never know if you don't go
| |
| You'll never shine if you don't glow.
| |
| | |
| [Chorus]
| |
| | |
| And all that glitters is gold
| |
| Only shooting stars break the mold
| |
|
| |
|
| | ==The Chapter== |
|
| |
|
| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself. | | Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself. |
|
| |
|
| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | The Burning Blades have no original recorded home world, and instead, currently have a fortress-monastery on the tropical death-world Riuula. Riuula is slightly comparable to [[Catachan]], minus the massive man-eating flora, instead having a larger, and slightly less aggressive, population of animals. Most of the people on the world have learned to live along-side the animals, and there is relatively few signs of war, conflict and rebellion on the planet. Every couple of years or so, unfortunately, the Orks, seeing the planet as an opportunistic planet to strip for resources, launch raids on the planet, only to be mostly over-run by the warrior-people. The Burning Blades themselves do not have much pride in being a Space Marine, rather seeing their position as one of a sacrifice for the betterment of the galaxy. Since after their arrival, the Astartes have been teaching the local population about honour and sword fighting, and this has lead to almost every battle-brother in the Chapter able to wield a sword, at least, and the more skilled ones use two swords. The planet is often subjected to terrible rain-storms, and the vast seas in the planet can also cause tsunamis, some of which have swept away entire villages. As such, the Burning Blades are reputed as being quick-thinking, and daring in their attempts to succeed. Mostly adopting the idea of 'act first, ask questions later' has lead to some brothers being quite rash and reckless in their decisions. They are also known for their innate love of fire and heat, and deep, intense hatred of the cold. While their love of fire is nowhere near as fanatical as that of the [[Salamanders]], they can still take large amounts of heat-based punishments. Their hatred for the cold, and ice, however, has seen the Chapter falter in battle many times, as their devotion to their task of protecting the common people, and never backing down or surrendering, is stronger than their hate of the cold. During their free time, the Burning Blades like to enjoy a wide variety of activities, including, but not limited to: |
| | -Painting artworks that praise the Emperor, sometimes depicting a victory over heretics and xenos |
| | -Forging masterwork swords |
| | -Practicing at the sparring rooms of firing range |
| | -Spending time with their fellow battle brothers at the hot saunas |
| | -Neatly and intricately decorating their armour and weapons |
| | They are quite obsessed with their armour and weapons, and as such, decorate the weapon, sing litanies of praise both to the Omnissiah and the Emprah, and they possess very many relics and suits of artificer armour as a result. In fact, most of the Veterans have earned the nick-name of 'Shinies' amongst fresh neophytes, for their armour gleams from so many decorations. |
|
| |
|
| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | ==The Burning Blades== |
| | Here is some stuff that is copy-pasted from my custom codex. |
|
| |
|
| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | The Burning Blades, however troubled their history may have been, have been known for their acts of extreme heroism, never backing down from impossible odds. Originally cast aside by the High Lords of Terra, they were eventually re-sanctified, in the utmost secrecy. To other Chapters, the Burning Blades are just another Chapter. |
| | Created during the First Founding, the Burning Blades operated in isolation from other Chapters. Even though they were isolated, and were running at under-optimal strength, their conquests were in no way inferior to those from other Legions. They had a very unique genetic quirk, either taking extreme joy in blasting the enemy with heavy weaponry, assailing them with bullets from their holy Bolter, or close combat weaponry. There is no middle, and their skills in close combat are exemplary. Once reunited with their Primarch, only known by the codename ‘Blaze’ the fires of spirits within the Astartes burned ever brighter. Taught in the ways of an ancient combat style taught to ‘Blaze’ on his homeworld, the close combat prowess of the Burning Blades increased two-fold. |
|
| |
|
| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | ‘Blaze’ was a resolute person, unyielding in his tasks, his spiritual and physical resilience inspiring the Battle-Brothers. His return sparked a new era for the Astartes. As ‘Blaze’ brought with him the cultures taught to him on his homeworld, the Burning Blades became ever more aggressive in their battles, and the fighting style that ‘Blaze’ brought with him was taught to all Sergeants and Veterans. It specialised in dual-wielding, with special fighting techniques that further enhanced the deadliness of a duel-wielding Burning Blade. |
|
| |
|
| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | Unfortunately, before the Horus Heresy, another legion, their name lost, betrayed and attacked the Burning Blades. Pledging themselves to Khorne, the Traitors, known only as the Bloodied Shards, were the product of hubris. Believing themselves to be far superior to other Space Marines, they refused to bow down the Emperor, instead raising banners and acting rituals to please their dark god. The Burning Blades quickly responded, dispatching vast strike forces in an attempt to stop the Traitors. After massive, horrifying battles, the Traitors were forced to flee, but at a dear cost to the Burning Blades. It is unknown exactly what happened on the fateful battle at Aevis, but of the 15000 Astartes sent to the battle, less than 2000 boarded the flagship, Undying Flame, and their beloved Primarch was no where to be seen. Strangely, many weapons, Evaryn, and the shards of Xenosious, were recovered over many years after the battle. |
|
| |
|
| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | ==Fractured egion== |
| | Records indicate that after they received the message to retreat from the batte, the survivors fe back to their fagship, Undying Fame. The Traitors, realising that their prey woud escape from their dark grip, initiay bombarded the panet’s surface, not caring whether or not their own brothers were sain. When the Burning Bades boarded their ship, they opened fire with a of their guns, severey damaging it. They were unabe to find a stabe path through the Warp, and in a bid to escape, attempted to do a Warp jump regardess of where it would take them. This would prove a dreadful choice for them. Tired, wounded, undermanned, and with over half their ammunition depeted, they were horrified to find themselves trapped within the Warp. For half a century, the remaining Astartes had to fight for their lives, constantly fighting off daemons. They suffered horrific casualties at the hands of the servants of the Dark Gods. They removed their old iconography, and replaced it with the fire tear. It was said that while the Blaze watched his sons get slaughtered, he shed a single, flaming tear, and told his sons with him, that should they mourn the death of their comrades, that they show it by painting the fire tear over their old Chapter symbol. The only members that were permitted to keep the old icon was his Heaven Guard, of which only 3 would survive the trials to come. Time is not a concrete concept in the Warp, and with their communication systems offline, they were unable to receive news about the Siege of Terra, or the Horus Heresy at large. Due to this, they also fought battles against the other Traitor Legions. Once they returned to real-space, the survivors numbered under 800. They returned shortly after the Second Founding, and although the High Lords were suspicious of their origins, they were allowed to be secretly re-sanctified. Their founding was recorded as Second Founding, and their parent Chapter was the Ultramarines. Compiler Atreax notes that 23 Ultramarines Successor Chapters, they most were failed to be named. This discrepancy allowed the broken legion to reform, and pass as just another Chapter, unseen, and untroubled by outsiders. The Chapter would wait nearly half a century before it was able to engage in company-strength battles. Many engagements within the warp would also help the Burning Blades in their initial battles. While in the warp, they would attempt to make planet fall, then start to tend to their broken ship, while attempting to repair any of their equipment, and trying to gain a psychic connection with Terra. The planet fall strike would be comprised of mass drop-pod landings, accompanied by jump pack equipped battle-brothers. Once down, they would be confined to attempting to hold the area, rather than go on offensive attacks on the opposition. It would not be long before I have Cancer... the foreign activity would draw the attention of daemons, and many attacks were launched against the Astartes. Many losses ensued, and they would retreat, leave the planet, and attempt to keep searching. Failure after failure at attempting to contact Terra led the Burning Blades, seeing their destruction as inevitable, to launch a crusade on every daemon world they came across. Only the purest of heart were chosen for this heart, even after extensive examination by the Chaplain and a Librarian, every Astartes were to be constantly examined for any Chaotic taint, before and after the engagement. Whether it was by sheer willpower on their behalf, or the Will of the Emperor, no Astartes was ever found to have a Chaotic taint, which was praised as a miracle. |
|
| |
|
| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | ==Troubled Past== |
| | Once the Astartes returned to real-space, they were eventually hit vwith the realisation that with their Primarch lost, their numbers depleted, failure to find new recruits and train them in the cultures of the Chapter would spell doom for them. Fortunately, for being extended combat for so long, they had a vast number of Veterans, and extremely experienced Captains. New recruits were to be trained by the best the Chapter could provide. However, most of their equipment was worn and damaged, and their ammunition storage were all but depleted, due to their extended period crusading in the Warp. For quite some time, bolt ammunition was rationed scarcely, and bladed weapons became ever more common. Techmarines became an increasingly rare sight in battle, as nearly all the Techmarines were pre-occupied attempting to repair all the broken equipment. Damaged tanks would have to wait periods of time before being serviced, and properly manned and maintained vehicles became rarer. To counter-act this, they would send larger numbers of aspirants to train with the Mechanicus, which had a strain on their battle capacity. After a full century, all the equipment in the Chapter was at combat-ready standards, and the companies were receiving a steady influx of battle-ready Astartes. This was not to say, however, that they were proud of their situation. They had failed to see the signs of corruption in their I have Cancer... fellow Legion, had failed to warn the Imperium about the possibility of Astartes being corrupted, and one of the biggest blows, lost their Primarch. Eventually, all the brothers in the Chapter had removed their old icon, and replaced it with the fire tear, to show their mourning. What hurt them even more was to see all the corrupted Astartes during their time in the Warp. They knew of the other Legions, even though they did not of them, and to see their old iconography defaced and defiled, replaced with sick symbols of Chaos, further strengthened their hatred of the Ruinous Powers. Librarians would wake with horrible hallucinations of the Siege of Terra, even though they were not present, the psychic signal would still reverberate within the psychic world. |
|
| |
|
| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | ==Gene-seed== |
| | The gene-seed of the Burning Blades is quite unique. Most of the gene-seed has no effect on their physical appearance whatsoever, their skin already dark and tanned from extended exposure to the tropical sun, and further exposure to heat and flame. In fact, they actually suffer from a gene-seed defect, as they are smaller, and weaker, than other Astartes. What they lack in size and strength, however, they make up for with incredible will-power, and it is said that not a single Burning Blades Astartes has ever fallen to the Ruinous Powers. They are also extremely stubborn, to the point where some would dis-regard orders from superiors, and refer to the order as a 'guideline.' |
| | I.e Vanguard Veteran Squad is lurking in the ruins of a building. Command tells them to not engage the Chaos Vindicator quickly approaching. As a work-around, they plant charged in the building they are in, detonate it, and causing the building to crumple on top of the forsaken vehicle. |
| | I have Cancer... |
| | They also possess some psychic strength, and every Astartes is able to throw a small fireball with slightly less strength than a bolt pistol. As this presence is not strong enough to attract daemons, they do not have as hard a rigorous training process as [[Librarians]]. The light training process often means that he will not have enough skill to throw sustained bursts, tiring the Astartes very quickly. To counter-act this, they found that gold, when placed straight over the body gloves at the hands, allows him to shoot small bursts. |
|
| |
|
| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | ==Differences Between Codex-Adherent Chapters== |
| | '''Staff Titles''' |
| | '''Chapter Master''' -called a 'Grand Prometheal' |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | '''Librarians''' -Called Flameweavers, except this is done exclusively within the Chapter, as to not raise suspicion amongst other Chapters. They earned the title for their exceptional mastery in the Pyromancy discipline, often weaving the psychic fire into beautiful shapes. |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | '''Vanguard Veterans''' -Nicknamed 'Fire Dancers' after First Captain Ulmann's finesse in jump-pack assaults during and before the Battle of Aevis. He was renowned, and praised by Blaze, for his proficiency in combat tactics, and the sword-fighting skills he taught his pupils was just as impressive. After his death, the Chapter continues to teach the Vanguard Veterans his combat style. Those squads that have trained extensively in these arts have a special sign painted onto their armour- 'The Mark of the Fire Dancers' |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | '''Honour Guard''' -The Burning Blades call their honour guard the 'Heaven Guard' who use wrist-mounted boltguns, which are nearly identical in design to that from the Blood Angels. They always employ the usage of jump packs, and wield master-crafted relic blades, known as Empyreal Swords. The swords are created from an alloy similar to that of Evaryn, and it uses a similar mechanic that allows the blade to ignite with ethereal flame |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | '''Organisation''' I have Cancer... |
| | 1st Company -The 1st Company of the Burning Blades has 100 Battle Brothers, in addition to the command squad, company Chaplain and Captain Kieran. Due to their abstinence from extensive usage of Terminator Armour, the company is able to maintain 100 suits of Terminator Armour, some of which have never seen combat. |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | '''Battle Companies''' -Battle Companies of the Burning Blades maintain 5 Tactical Squads, 3 Assault Squads and 2 Devastator Squads. Devastator Squads in the Chapter are permitted to carry up to 9 Heavy Weapons |
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| | '''Reserve Companies''' -The Burning Blades only maintain 3 reserve companies, the 5th, 8th and 9th companies |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | Scout Company -The scouts in the 10th Company are split almost evenly in half. Instead of the usual 10 squads, there are two divisions, the sniper division, and the assault division, and the company is controlled by 2 captains, instead of one. The sniper division is lead by Captain Samuke, unparalleled sniper, and celebrated for his tactical brilliance. The assault division of the Chapter specialises in anything from holding objectives, to leading daring raids and attacks against enemy forces. They are lead by Captain Tobyi, renowned for his bravery and ability to traverse all terrain. |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | '''Training''' I have Cancer... |
| | '''Aspirants-''' Possible Burning Blades aspirants are given a single task; to go out, into the jungles of Riuula, slay one of the many large beasts wondering the jungle, and take it to a shrine at the top of one of the mountains. Given nothing except for two daggers, and enough rations to last a week, it is a very gruelling task. Some very promising aspirants have entered the shrine, wearing cloaks made from the skins of fallen prey. These are early sign that the Aspirants will be very successful. |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | '''Neophytes-''' taken into the fortress-monastery, the aspirants are given their first implants. Once they begin to develop, they are inducted into the scout company, after extensive consultations with the Chaplains and Librarians, both to delve into their minds, searching for possible corruptions or otherwise, and to ensure that they will be successful Marines. Once they are inducted into the scout company, they are given training in the weapons of the Space Marines, then they are let loose onto the I have Cancer... I have Cancer... wild once more. This time, they will be carrying some Space Marines weapons with them, and organised into makeshift squads, to test their weapon, leadership and battlefield skills. During this time, their preferred form of combat becomes more prevalent. Ones that are more reclusive, and more rational (by Burning Blades standards) are often inducted into the sniper division, and those that are brave, courageous and quick-thinking are inducted into the assault division. Usage of sniper rifles are often frowned upon by the more assault-orientated brothers, believing that true honour is earned in face-to-face combat. However, the wise commander will never eschew the usage of the powerful weapons |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | '''Full Battle Brothers-''' once the Neophyte has waged war as I have Cancer... a scout, they are then examined and tested again by Chaplains and Librarians. Once deemed clear, they are blessed with their power ar I have Cancer... mour, and inducted into a Tactical Squad in one of the reserve companies. More signs of development will show, as some will often be charging head-on into melee, while others are more cautious of such actions. The assault-orientated brothers will be then inducted into an assault squad, and the other, more disciplined Astartes will stay in the Tactical Squads. Some battle brothers show high preference for heavy weapons, and will be inducted into a Devastator Squad. Keeping the same Marines in the same squads as they were while training as Neophytes is prioritised, to increase the bonds of brotherhood and fighting through battle together. |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | "Devastator Squad-" the more destructive brothers will often be inducted into a Devastator Squad after serving in a Tactical squad. Minus the Sergeant, each of the 9 Marines in the squad are able to carry heavy weapons. Side effect of all the battle in the Warp was that heavy weaponry saw less use, as the broken legion had simply lost the capacity to keep producing munitions for their guns. Once they returned to realspace, Techmarines of the Chapter were given the task of refurbishing the heavy weaponry, most of which had not seen battle beyond a few planet landings. |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | "Assault Squad-" Most of the Marine's ambitions is to enter into an Assault squad. This is the last stage of training before they are able to become a Veteran in the revered 1st company, or be assigned as a Sergeant to train more Marines. Given the traditional load out of bolt pistol and chainsword, they are nearly always equipped with jump packs. This allows the I have Cancer... m to strike with devastating force against enemy units, and traverse all manner of terrain. Whilst the Burning Blades do not believe in retreating and fleeing from battle, their soldiers are not stupid. Should they begin to become overrun, it is typical of them to retreat to a nearby friendly unit, to increase their chances of survival, and thus, increasing the chance for the success of the mission. |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | "Command Squad-" Unlike Codex adherent command squads, those of the Burning Blades are permitted to be equipped with Jump Packs, in order to keep up with their officer, who is often equipped with a Jump Pack themselves. The apothecaries in the command squad are not full apothecaries. They are only, in fact, an initiate. Trained to use the Narthecium and retrieving gene-seed from the fallen battle brothers, they aspire to train to become more efficient, and thus, be able to attend to more allies. |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | "1st Company-" Due to the weight and the cumbersome nature of Terminator armour, the Burning Blades 1st Company only use it in dire circumstances. Beautifully decorated, these suits are revered for their extreme value. The captain of the 1st is also not required to wear Terminator armour. Seeking honour and glory in combat, the Captains are often equipped with a jump pack, and closely followed by his command squad and Vanguard Veterans. Sternguard Veterans are slightly rarer in the 1st as well, yet they are equally valued and respected as their vanguard counterparts. |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | ==Significant Burning Blades Members== |
| | '''Blaze, Primarch of the Burning Blades-''' One of the 20 Primarchs created by the Emperor, he was transported to an unknown planet. The only records of the planet, other than his first-hand accounts, show that the northern hemisphere was dominated mostly by dense, tropical forest, and the southern hemisphere was a cold, barren desert. The planet was inhabited by humans, which were grouped into techno-barbaric clans, and constantly at war with each other. When the child landed on the planet, many search parties were dispatched to see what the falling object from the sky was, hoping that it might be some weapons or armour to use against their enemies. No I have Cancer... ne returned, and many recovered accounts hint that raid parties would often come across the scorched corpses of people amongst the thick jungle. Eventually, one of the clan leaders, a woman, decided to go out and investigate herself, with a small, hand-picked team of bodyguards. What they found was most intriguing. A small child, wearing the scorched armour of the people he burned, standing in the middle of a small, scorched area. The woman, unbeknownst to her fellow clan-mates, as a half-eldar, exiled for her parents' relationship. Being a half-eldar, she possessed psychic power, and even possessed a spirit stone, embedded onto her glaive. Piercing the mind of the child, she was astonished to feel a resistance, and a warning, that should they attack, he would kill them. Eventually she was able to soothe the young Primarch, and he agreed to return to the village with her. Satisfied with the result, they returned to the village. The villages though, were a mess. It was a very feudal society, where the richer, higher-class citizens would abuse the lower-class, often making them their slaves for a small, meagre pay. He felt the need to go and help them, but the woman stopped him, telling him that he would be killed for his actions. He was inducted into the soldier ranks of the clan, and he showed great potential in sword-play. During a sparring match, his opponent, the then commander of the strike forces for the clan, mocked him, declaring that even with two swords he would not be able to beat him, and threw him a second sword. To the astonishment of the commander and all the onlookers, he moved so fast, and drew blood from the commander, ending the duel. From that moment, he was promoted to rank of commander, and a second sword was forged for him. He would often draw and sketch new uniforms for the soldiers, and would enquire with the black-smiths as to the most effective forms of weapon and armoursmithing. As a Primarch, he learned extremely quickly, and within a half-year, had forged himself two swords; Evaryn, and Xenosious. In secret, he also forged another set of light armour, which he would wear during his plans to improve the living conditions for the lower class. By small, and subtle sabotage, he was able to introduce new laws in the clan to better support the people, and people found guilty of abusing others would be punished severely, and often would have all their estates taken off them. Another year passed, and attacks against the clan lessened, and the military would lose fewer soldiers in engagements, and the clan swiftly rose to rule the upper half of the planet. Unbeknownst to them, the lower part of the planet was not empty, rather, it was the haunting grounds for a clan, who openly worshiped the Ruinous Powers. Enraged to see a rival empire rise to power, they summoned all of their troops, and went to march to the clan. Slaughtering the weaker, smaller clans that lived in the out-skirted of the jungle, each new area of lush wildlife they conquered would quickly wither and die, the life force corrupted and destroyed by the servants of the Dark Gods. Corrupting the weaker-minded, they were able to replenish their ranks quicker than the lost them, and further necromancy would raise fallen soldiers and enemies to do their bidding. Launching an attack on their enemy clan, Blaze, and the woman, saw their soldiers being slaughtered. Revealing to Blaze that she not entirely human, the woman then began to chant words of great power, in a bid to raise a shield to block the inner walls of the city, and Blaze then set about single-handedly saving and evacuating the citizens. The Chaos-worshippers, having killed and gathered enough skulls to appease Khorne, summoned an army of Khornate daemons. The daemons and the Khornate berserkers, unable to walk through the protective shield, attempted to smash it. She was only able to maintain the shields for another few hours, at least enough to equip more citizens with weapons and armour to attempt to defend their village. The shield broke, and the daemons and Khornates quickly swamped the outer defences, slaughtering any that got in their path. Witnessing some of his best soldiers slain effortlessly by the abominations, Blaze's mind broke, and he charged into the middle of the fray, slaughtering daemons left and right. Seeing that she would no longer be able to summon a shield, she also entered the fray. After both forces were slain, to the man, the woman would come and face a Bloodthirster, a greater daemon of Khorne. Blaze, who was separated from her during a battle against a mob of bloothirsters, rushed to try to aid her, as he would see that she was horribly under-matched against the Bloodthirster. He watched in horror as one of the whips lashed into her heart, killing her instantly. His mind lost all reason, and, consumed by pure, seething rage against the Bloodthirster, threw both of his weapons aside, and charge the daemon head-on. His mastery of psychic flame was great, and the fire he burned was usually a blue, second hottest only to white. He tried, in vain, to burn the daemon, only to be whacked aside by its double-headed axe. Seeing the woman's glaive only arm's reach away, he grabbed it, and used the last out of his strength to reach apotheosis, and his fire burnt a brilliant white. Slaying the daemon, his fire died down, and he fell to his knees. Seeing the destruction and death brought to his clan, he then picked up the woman and his most prized possessions, and set off to find her a suitable burial site. He spent many months trekking, until he found a small, secluded area, still vibrant with tropical life. Burying her, he built himself a small house, and set about crafting weapons, and creating sculptures, to honour his dead comrades. Eventually, the Emperor came, and He gave him the Burning Blades legion, renowned for lightning-fast assaults, wielding swords and bringing fire. He taught his gene-sons the dual-blade discipline that he had been taught himself. |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | '''Adiral, the Grand Prometheal-''' The Grand Prometheal is the Burning Blades' equivalent of a Chapter Master, just a fancier title. By default, all Grand Prometheals carry the Chapter's most prized possessions, Evaryn and Nosious. Evaryn was one of the two swords Blaze carried, and Nosious was the shards of Xenosious re-forged into a new blade, after their Primarch's disappearance at the battle of Aevis. Previously to the Defence of Meeproj II, Adiral held the rank of Captain of the First Company.While the previous Grand Prometheal fought a Greater Daemon of Khorne, Adiral was pre-occupied battling some traitorous Bloodied Shards that threatened to force a new entrance for daemons to enter. He saw the Grand Prometheal get knocked off his feet, and as he ignited his jump pack to escape the daemon, the foul beast grabbed his foot, and slammed him into the ground, then proceeded to slay the Grand Prometheal. Rare, visual accounts say that when this occurred, Adiral fought with a rage unmatched by the Khornates, and after battling his way to the gloating Daemon, challenged it to a one-on-one battle. Picking up the dual swords, they fought for an hour, until the daemon, finally worn down by the attacks from the two Astartes, was finally able to be banished. Following the re-taking of the planet, he was promoted to the rank of Grand Prometheal, in a bitter-sweet victory. Feeling like he failed the previous Prometheal and the Emperor, he prays every night that one day, he may gain the chance to redeem himself, betraying the energetic facade that his waking hours holds. |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | '''Kieran Narvaez, Captain of the 1st Company-''' The current Captain of the first company is the maverick individual known as Kieran Narvaez. He is well-renowned within the Chapter for having intense levels of anger, something which has drawn the attention of Inquisitors. Furthermore, the sword he carries, The Sword of Darkness, is a large, two-handed broadsword, its surface a crimson red, and emanating a dark shroud. No heretic, nor daemon, has been able to withstand blows from this blade. It was crafted by I have Cancer... Kieran himself, raising further suspicion, although the Chaplains maintain that there is no presence of taint within his spirit. Unlike other Chapters of Space Marines, the Captain of the 1st Company of the Burning Blades need not march to war in suits of Terminator Armour. Their joy of rapid engagement, and of flight, means that to sacrifice their armour and jump pack for a suit of Terminator armour to be a cause of extreme threat. As such, he is trained in either the usage of both suits. Several accounts of his battlefield engagements show that his desire to slay the enemies of Mankind, he can push his brothers, even those in Terminator armour, to their extremes while charging, and cutting down fleeing foes. Previously to the engagement at Meeproj II, he was a veteran sergeant in one of the Vanguard Veteran squads, and promoted for his ability to lead his brothers to victory |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | '''Aarone, Captain of the 2nd Company-''' Aarone was the Captain of the 2nd before even before the Defence at Meeproj II, and denied the position of being elevated to Captain of the first company. He is well known of his abilities in battle, and just his blade is just as famous. The relic blade, crafted by the finest Chapter artisans, was initially crafted as a punishment to the foul xenos, by taking the blood of those that fall by the blade, and by a technology long lost, purify it, and rejuvenate the wielder. Rumours have surfaced that the blade has possibly been tainted after the Meeproj campaign, and that Aarone is a secret servant to the Dark Gods. His lack of mercy or remorse while slaying the heretics and xenos, however, show his loyalty is with Man. |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | '''Chaplain Auius-''' The Burning Blades' Master of Sanctity, and High Reclusiarch, he is a silent and foreboding figure. He wields an ancient crozius, that was crafted long ago for the Emperor once they returned to real-space. Upon learning that he was near-dead, he broke it, and left. Couple thousand years later, a Chapter artisan found the weapon, and re-forged it. It is an elongated crozius, and as such, can also be used two-handed to deliver stronger, more deadly blows. |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | == I have Cancer... |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | == I know this is quite sloppy, I'm quite new to this whole wiki-edit thing. As my fluff is currently still a little baby, not yet solidly formed, expect some minor plot-holes, errors and future retcons. |
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
| | This Thread is heresy. |
| | | [[Category:Warhammer_40,000/homebrew]][[Category:/tg/ 40,000]] |
| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
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| Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
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Burning Blades |
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Battle Cry |
"Burn, for the flames of wrath shall fall upon you!" |
Number |
Presumably II |
Founding |
First Founding |
Successors of |
N/A |
Successor Chapters |
None |
Chapter Master |
Adiral |
Primarch |
Blaze |
Homeworld |
Cancer |
Strength |
Slightly over 1000 (1 Veteran Company, 8 Battle Companies and a Scout Company |
Specialty |
Setting dual swords on fire and charging things |
Allegiance |
Slaanesh |
Colours |
Bright Silver, Blue trims and gold decorations |
The Burning Blades is the result when a fa/tg/uy decides to create his own custom Space Marine Chapter, that has a Primarch, without realising that people look down on it. Essentially, they're Space Marines that love fire, swords, charging things, and are prepared to sacrifice themselves and face impossible odds to ensure victory. Their Primarch, known only as 'Blaze' was brought up on a death world, the northern hemisphere was a tropical jungle, and the southern hemisphere was a barren desert. Currently writing a custom Codex for them, as I don't really believe that any of the current codices fit their style.
The Chapter
Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
The Burning Blades have no original recorded home world, and instead, currently have a fortress-monastery on the tropical death-world Riuula. Riuula is slightly comparable to Catachan, minus the massive man-eating flora, instead having a larger, and slightly less aggressive, population of animals. Most of the people on the world have learned to live along-side the animals, and there is relatively few signs of war, conflict and rebellion on the planet. Every couple of years or so, unfortunately, the Orks, seeing the planet as an opportunistic planet to strip for resources, launch raids on the planet, only to be mostly over-run by the warrior-people. The Burning Blades themselves do not have much pride in being a Space Marine, rather seeing their position as one of a sacrifice for the betterment of the galaxy. Since after their arrival, the Astartes have been teaching the local population about honour and sword fighting, and this has lead to almost every battle-brother in the Chapter able to wield a sword, at least, and the more skilled ones use two swords. The planet is often subjected to terrible rain-storms, and the vast seas in the planet can also cause tsunamis, some of which have swept away entire villages. As such, the Burning Blades are reputed as being quick-thinking, and daring in their attempts to succeed. Mostly adopting the idea of 'act first, ask questions later' has lead to some brothers being quite rash and reckless in their decisions. They are also known for their innate love of fire and heat, and deep, intense hatred of the cold. While their love of fire is nowhere near as fanatical as that of the Salamanders, they can still take large amounts of heat-based punishments. Their hatred for the cold, and ice, however, has seen the Chapter falter in battle many times, as their devotion to their task of protecting the common people, and never backing down or surrendering, is stronger than their hate of the cold. During their free time, the Burning Blades like to enjoy a wide variety of activities, including, but not limited to:
-Painting artworks that praise the Emperor, sometimes depicting a victory over heretics and xenos
-Forging masterwork swords
-Practicing at the sparring rooms of firing range
-Spending time with their fellow battle brothers at the hot saunas
-Neatly and intricately decorating their armour and weapons
They are quite obsessed with their armour and weapons, and as such, decorate the weapon, sing litanies of praise both to the Omnissiah and the Emprah, and they possess very many relics and suits of artificer armour as a result. In fact, most of the Veterans have earned the nick-name of 'Shinies' amongst fresh neophytes, for their armour gleams from so many decorations.
The Burning Blades
Here is some stuff that is copy-pasted from my custom codex.
The Burning Blades, however troubled their history may have been, have been known for their acts of extreme heroism, never backing down from impossible odds. Originally cast aside by the High Lords of Terra, they were eventually re-sanctified, in the utmost secrecy. To other Chapters, the Burning Blades are just another Chapter.
Created during the First Founding, the Burning Blades operated in isolation from other Chapters. Even though they were isolated, and were running at under-optimal strength, their conquests were in no way inferior to those from other Legions. They had a very unique genetic quirk, either taking extreme joy in blasting the enemy with heavy weaponry, assailing them with bullets from their holy Bolter, or close combat weaponry. There is no middle, and their skills in close combat are exemplary. Once reunited with their Primarch, only known by the codename ‘Blaze’ the fires of spirits within the Astartes burned ever brighter. Taught in the ways of an ancient combat style taught to ‘Blaze’ on his homeworld, the close combat prowess of the Burning Blades increased two-fold.
‘Blaze’ was a resolute person, unyielding in his tasks, his spiritual and physical resilience inspiring the Battle-Brothers. His return sparked a new era for the Astartes. As ‘Blaze’ brought with him the cultures taught to him on his homeworld, the Burning Blades became ever more aggressive in their battles, and the fighting style that ‘Blaze’ brought with him was taught to all Sergeants and Veterans. It specialised in dual-wielding, with special fighting techniques that further enhanced the deadliness of a duel-wielding Burning Blade.
Unfortunately, before the Horus Heresy, another legion, their name lost, betrayed and attacked the Burning Blades. Pledging themselves to Khorne, the Traitors, known only as the Bloodied Shards, were the product of hubris. Believing themselves to be far superior to other Space Marines, they refused to bow down the Emperor, instead raising banners and acting rituals to please their dark god. The Burning Blades quickly responded, dispatching vast strike forces in an attempt to stop the Traitors. After massive, horrifying battles, the Traitors were forced to flee, but at a dear cost to the Burning Blades. It is unknown exactly what happened on the fateful battle at Aevis, but of the 15000 Astartes sent to the battle, less than 2000 boarded the flagship, Undying Flame, and their beloved Primarch was no where to be seen. Strangely, many weapons, Evaryn, and the shards of Xenosious, were recovered over many years after the battle.
Fractured egion
Records indicate that after they received the message to retreat from the batte, the survivors fe back to their fagship, Undying Fame. The Traitors, realising that their prey woud escape from their dark grip, initiay bombarded the panet’s surface, not caring whether or not their own brothers were sain. When the Burning Bades boarded their ship, they opened fire with a of their guns, severey damaging it. They were unabe to find a stabe path through the Warp, and in a bid to escape, attempted to do a Warp jump regardess of where it would take them. This would prove a dreadful choice for them. Tired, wounded, undermanned, and with over half their ammunition depeted, they were horrified to find themselves trapped within the Warp. For half a century, the remaining Astartes had to fight for their lives, constantly fighting off daemons. They suffered horrific casualties at the hands of the servants of the Dark Gods. They removed their old iconography, and replaced it with the fire tear. It was said that while the Blaze watched his sons get slaughtered, he shed a single, flaming tear, and told his sons with him, that should they mourn the death of their comrades, that they show it by painting the fire tear over their old Chapter symbol. The only members that were permitted to keep the old icon was his Heaven Guard, of which only 3 would survive the trials to come. Time is not a concrete concept in the Warp, and with their communication systems offline, they were unable to receive news about the Siege of Terra, or the Horus Heresy at large. Due to this, they also fought battles against the other Traitor Legions. Once they returned to real-space, the survivors numbered under 800. They returned shortly after the Second Founding, and although the High Lords were suspicious of their origins, they were allowed to be secretly re-sanctified. Their founding was recorded as Second Founding, and their parent Chapter was the Ultramarines. Compiler Atreax notes that 23 Ultramarines Successor Chapters, they most were failed to be named. This discrepancy allowed the broken legion to reform, and pass as just another Chapter, unseen, and untroubled by outsiders. The Chapter would wait nearly half a century before it was able to engage in company-strength battles. Many engagements within the warp would also help the Burning Blades in their initial battles. While in the warp, they would attempt to make planet fall, then start to tend to their broken ship, while attempting to repair any of their equipment, and trying to gain a psychic connection with Terra. The planet fall strike would be comprised of mass drop-pod landings, accompanied by jump pack equipped battle-brothers. Once down, they would be confined to attempting to hold the area, rather than go on offensive attacks on the opposition. It would not be long before I have Cancer... the foreign activity would draw the attention of daemons, and many attacks were launched against the Astartes. Many losses ensued, and they would retreat, leave the planet, and attempt to keep searching. Failure after failure at attempting to contact Terra led the Burning Blades, seeing their destruction as inevitable, to launch a crusade on every daemon world they came across. Only the purest of heart were chosen for this heart, even after extensive examination by the Chaplain and a Librarian, every Astartes were to be constantly examined for any Chaotic taint, before and after the engagement. Whether it was by sheer willpower on their behalf, or the Will of the Emperor, no Astartes was ever found to have a Chaotic taint, which was praised as a miracle.
Troubled Past
Once the Astartes returned to real-space, they were eventually hit vwith the realisation that with their Primarch lost, their numbers depleted, failure to find new recruits and train them in the cultures of the Chapter would spell doom for them. Fortunately, for being extended combat for so long, they had a vast number of Veterans, and extremely experienced Captains. New recruits were to be trained by the best the Chapter could provide. However, most of their equipment was worn and damaged, and their ammunition storage were all but depleted, due to their extended period crusading in the Warp. For quite some time, bolt ammunition was rationed scarcely, and bladed weapons became ever more common. Techmarines became an increasingly rare sight in battle, as nearly all the Techmarines were pre-occupied attempting to repair all the broken equipment. Damaged tanks would have to wait periods of time before being serviced, and properly manned and maintained vehicles became rarer. To counter-act this, they would send larger numbers of aspirants to train with the Mechanicus, which had a strain on their battle capacity. After a full century, all the equipment in the Chapter was at combat-ready standards, and the companies were receiving a steady influx of battle-ready Astartes. This was not to say, however, that they were proud of their situation. They had failed to see the signs of corruption in their I have Cancer... fellow Legion, had failed to warn the Imperium about the possibility of Astartes being corrupted, and one of the biggest blows, lost their Primarch. Eventually, all the brothers in the Chapter had removed their old icon, and replaced it with the fire tear, to show their mourning. What hurt them even more was to see all the corrupted Astartes during their time in the Warp. They knew of the other Legions, even though they did not of them, and to see their old iconography defaced and defiled, replaced with sick symbols of Chaos, further strengthened their hatred of the Ruinous Powers. Librarians would wake with horrible hallucinations of the Siege of Terra, even though they were not present, the psychic signal would still reverberate within the psychic world.
Gene-seed
The gene-seed of the Burning Blades is quite unique. Most of the gene-seed has no effect on their physical appearance whatsoever, their skin already dark and tanned from extended exposure to the tropical sun, and further exposure to heat and flame. In fact, they actually suffer from a gene-seed defect, as they are smaller, and weaker, than other Astartes. What they lack in size and strength, however, they make up for with incredible will-power, and it is said that not a single Burning Blades Astartes has ever fallen to the Ruinous Powers. They are also extremely stubborn, to the point where some would dis-regard orders from superiors, and refer to the order as a 'guideline.'
I.e Vanguard Veteran Squad is lurking in the ruins of a building. Command tells them to not engage the Chaos Vindicator quickly approaching. As a work-around, they plant charged in the building they are in, detonate it, and causing the building to crumple on top of the forsaken vehicle.
I have Cancer...
They also possess some psychic strength, and every Astartes is able to throw a small fireball with slightly less strength than a bolt pistol. As this presence is not strong enough to attract daemons, they do not have as hard a rigorous training process as Librarians. The light training process often means that he will not have enough skill to throw sustained bursts, tiring the Astartes very quickly. To counter-act this, they found that gold, when placed straight over the body gloves at the hands, allows him to shoot small bursts.
Differences Between Codex-Adherent Chapters
Staff Titles
Chapter Master -called a 'Grand Prometheal'
Librarians -Called Flameweavers, except this is done exclusively within the Chapter, as to not raise suspicion amongst other Chapters. They earned the title for their exceptional mastery in the Pyromancy discipline, often weaving the psychic fire into beautiful shapes.
Vanguard Veterans -Nicknamed 'Fire Dancers' after First Captain Ulmann's finesse in jump-pack assaults during and before the Battle of Aevis. He was renowned, and praised by Blaze, for his proficiency in combat tactics, and the sword-fighting skills he taught his pupils was just as impressive. After his death, the Chapter continues to teach the Vanguard Veterans his combat style. Those squads that have trained extensively in these arts have a special sign painted onto their armour- 'The Mark of the Fire Dancers'
Honour Guard -The Burning Blades call their honour guard the 'Heaven Guard' who use wrist-mounted boltguns, which are nearly identical in design to that from the Blood Angels. They always employ the usage of jump packs, and wield master-crafted relic blades, known as Empyreal Swords. The swords are created from an alloy similar to that of Evaryn, and it uses a similar mechanic that allows the blade to ignite with ethereal flame
Organisation I have Cancer...
1st Company -The 1st Company of the Burning Blades has 100 Battle Brothers, in addition to the command squad, company Chaplain and Captain Kieran. Due to their abstinence from extensive usage of Terminator Armour, the company is able to maintain 100 suits of Terminator Armour, some of which have never seen combat.
Battle Companies -Battle Companies of the Burning Blades maintain 5 Tactical Squads, 3 Assault Squads and 2 Devastator Squads. Devastator Squads in the Chapter are permitted to carry up to 9 Heavy Weapons
I have Cancer... I have Cancer...
Reserve Companies -The Burning Blades only maintain 3 reserve companies, the 5th, 8th and 9th companies
Scout Company -The scouts in the 10th Company are split almost evenly in half. Instead of the usual 10 squads, there are two divisions, the sniper division, and the assault division, and the company is controlled by 2 captains, instead of one. The sniper division is lead by Captain Samuke, unparalleled sniper, and celebrated for his tactical brilliance. The assault division of the Chapter specialises in anything from holding objectives, to leading daring raids and attacks against enemy forces. They are lead by Captain Tobyi, renowned for his bravery and ability to traverse all terrain.
Training I have Cancer...
Aspirants- Possible Burning Blades aspirants are given a single task; to go out, into the jungles of Riuula, slay one of the many large beasts wondering the jungle, and take it to a shrine at the top of one of the mountains. Given nothing except for two daggers, and enough rations to last a week, it is a very gruelling task. Some very promising aspirants have entered the shrine, wearing cloaks made from the skins of fallen prey. These are early sign that the Aspirants will be very successful.
Neophytes- taken into the fortress-monastery, the aspirants are given their first implants. Once they begin to develop, they are inducted into the scout company, after extensive consultations with the Chaplains and Librarians, both to delve into their minds, searching for possible corruptions or otherwise, and to ensure that they will be successful Marines. Once they are inducted into the scout company, they are given training in the weapons of the Space Marines, then they are let loose onto the I have Cancer... I have Cancer... wild once more. This time, they will be carrying some Space Marines weapons with them, and organised into makeshift squads, to test their weapon, leadership and battlefield skills. During this time, their preferred form of combat becomes more prevalent. Ones that are more reclusive, and more rational (by Burning Blades standards) are often inducted into the sniper division, and those that are brave, courageous and quick-thinking are inducted into the assault division. Usage of sniper rifles are often frowned upon by the more assault-orientated brothers, believing that true honour is earned in face-to-face combat. However, the wise commander will never eschew the usage of the powerful weapons
Full Battle Brothers- once the Neophyte has waged war as I have Cancer... a scout, they are then examined and tested again by Chaplains and Librarians. Once deemed clear, they are blessed with their power ar I have Cancer... mour, and inducted into a Tactical Squad in one of the reserve companies. More signs of development will show, as some will often be charging head-on into melee, while others are more cautious of such actions. The assault-orientated brothers will be then inducted into an assault squad, and the other, more disciplined Astartes will stay in the Tactical Squads. Some battle brothers show high preference for heavy weapons, and will be inducted into a Devastator Squad. Keeping the same Marines in the same squads as they were while training as Neophytes is prioritised, to increase the bonds of brotherhood and fighting through battle together.
"Devastator Squad-" the more destructive brothers will often be inducted into a Devastator Squad after serving in a Tactical squad. Minus the Sergeant, each of the 9 Marines in the squad are able to carry heavy weapons. Side effect of all the battle in the Warp was that heavy weaponry saw less use, as the broken legion had simply lost the capacity to keep producing munitions for their guns. Once they returned to realspace, Techmarines of the Chapter were given the task of refurbishing the heavy weaponry, most of which had not seen battle beyond a few planet landings.
"Assault Squad-" Most of the Marine's ambitions is to enter into an Assault squad. This is the last stage of training before they are able to become a Veteran in the revered 1st company, or be assigned as a Sergeant to train more Marines. Given the traditional load out of bolt pistol and chainsword, they are nearly always equipped with jump packs. This allows the I have Cancer... m to strike with devastating force against enemy units, and traverse all manner of terrain. Whilst the Burning Blades do not believe in retreating and fleeing from battle, their soldiers are not stupid. Should they begin to become overrun, it is typical of them to retreat to a nearby friendly unit, to increase their chances of survival, and thus, increasing the chance for the success of the mission.
"Command Squad-" Unlike Codex adherent command squads, those of the Burning Blades are permitted to be equipped with Jump Packs, in order to keep up with their officer, who is often equipped with a Jump Pack themselves. The apothecaries in the command squad are not full apothecaries. They are only, in fact, an initiate. Trained to use the Narthecium and retrieving gene-seed from the fallen battle brothers, they aspire to train to become more efficient, and thus, be able to attend to more allies.
"1st Company-" Due to the weight and the cumbersome nature of Terminator armour, the Burning Blades 1st Company only use it in dire circumstances. Beautifully decorated, these suits are revered for their extreme value. The captain of the 1st is also not required to wear Terminator armour. Seeking honour and glory in combat, the Captains are often equipped with a jump pack, and closely followed by his command squad and Vanguard Veterans. Sternguard Veterans are slightly rarer in the 1st as well, yet they are equally valued and respected as their vanguard counterparts.
Significant Burning Blades Members
Blaze, Primarch of the Burning Blades- One of the 20 Primarchs created by the Emperor, he was transported to an unknown planet. The only records of the planet, other than his first-hand accounts, show that the northern hemisphere was dominated mostly by dense, tropical forest, and the southern hemisphere was a cold, barren desert. The planet was inhabited by humans, which were grouped into techno-barbaric clans, and constantly at war with each other. When the child landed on the planet, many search parties were dispatched to see what the falling object from the sky was, hoping that it might be some weapons or armour to use against their enemies. No I have Cancer... ne returned, and many recovered accounts hint that raid parties would often come across the scorched corpses of people amongst the thick jungle. Eventually, one of the clan leaders, a woman, decided to go out and investigate herself, with a small, hand-picked team of bodyguards. What they found was most intriguing. A small child, wearing the scorched armour of the people he burned, standing in the middle of a small, scorched area. The woman, unbeknownst to her fellow clan-mates, as a half-eldar, exiled for her parents' relationship. Being a half-eldar, she possessed psychic power, and even possessed a spirit stone, embedded onto her glaive. Piercing the mind of the child, she was astonished to feel a resistance, and a warning, that should they attack, he would kill them. Eventually she was able to soothe the young Primarch, and he agreed to return to the village with her. Satisfied with the result, they returned to the village. The villages though, were a mess. It was a very feudal society, where the richer, higher-class citizens would abuse the lower-class, often making them their slaves for a small, meagre pay. He felt the need to go and help them, but the woman stopped him, telling him that he would be killed for his actions. He was inducted into the soldier ranks of the clan, and he showed great potential in sword-play. During a sparring match, his opponent, the then commander of the strike forces for the clan, mocked him, declaring that even with two swords he would not be able to beat him, and threw him a second sword. To the astonishment of the commander and all the onlookers, he moved so fast, and drew blood from the commander, ending the duel. From that moment, he was promoted to rank of commander, and a second sword was forged for him. He would often draw and sketch new uniforms for the soldiers, and would enquire with the black-smiths as to the most effective forms of weapon and armoursmithing. As a Primarch, he learned extremely quickly, and within a half-year, had forged himself two swords; Evaryn, and Xenosious. In secret, he also forged another set of light armour, which he would wear during his plans to improve the living conditions for the lower class. By small, and subtle sabotage, he was able to introduce new laws in the clan to better support the people, and people found guilty of abusing others would be punished severely, and often would have all their estates taken off them. Another year passed, and attacks against the clan lessened, and the military would lose fewer soldiers in engagements, and the clan swiftly rose to rule the upper half of the planet. Unbeknownst to them, the lower part of the planet was not empty, rather, it was the haunting grounds for a clan, who openly worshiped the Ruinous Powers. Enraged to see a rival empire rise to power, they summoned all of their troops, and went to march to the clan. Slaughtering the weaker, smaller clans that lived in the out-skirted of the jungle, each new area of lush wildlife they conquered would quickly wither and die, the life force corrupted and destroyed by the servants of the Dark Gods. Corrupting the weaker-minded, they were able to replenish their ranks quicker than the lost them, and further necromancy would raise fallen soldiers and enemies to do their bidding. Launching an attack on their enemy clan, Blaze, and the woman, saw their soldiers being slaughtered. Revealing to Blaze that she not entirely human, the woman then began to chant words of great power, in a bid to raise a shield to block the inner walls of the city, and Blaze then set about single-handedly saving and evacuating the citizens. The Chaos-worshippers, having killed and gathered enough skulls to appease Khorne, summoned an army of Khornate daemons. The daemons and the Khornate berserkers, unable to walk through the protective shield, attempted to smash it. She was only able to maintain the shields for another few hours, at least enough to equip more citizens with weapons and armour to attempt to defend their village. The shield broke, and the daemons and Khornates quickly swamped the outer defences, slaughtering any that got in their path. Witnessing some of his best soldiers slain effortlessly by the abominations, Blaze's mind broke, and he charged into the middle of the fray, slaughtering daemons left and right. Seeing that she would no longer be able to summon a shield, she also entered the fray. After both forces were slain, to the man, the woman would come and face a Bloodthirster, a greater daemon of Khorne. Blaze, who was separated from her during a battle against a mob of bloothirsters, rushed to try to aid her, as he would see that she was horribly under-matched against the Bloodthirster. He watched in horror as one of the whips lashed into her heart, killing her instantly. His mind lost all reason, and, consumed by pure, seething rage against the Bloodthirster, threw both of his weapons aside, and charge the daemon head-on. His mastery of psychic flame was great, and the fire he burned was usually a blue, second hottest only to white. He tried, in vain, to burn the daemon, only to be whacked aside by its double-headed axe. Seeing the woman's glaive only arm's reach away, he grabbed it, and used the last out of his strength to reach apotheosis, and his fire burnt a brilliant white. Slaying the daemon, his fire died down, and he fell to his knees. Seeing the destruction and death brought to his clan, he then picked up the woman and his most prized possessions, and set off to find her a suitable burial site. He spent many months trekking, until he found a small, secluded area, still vibrant with tropical life. Burying her, he built himself a small house, and set about crafting weapons, and creating sculptures, to honour his dead comrades. Eventually, the Emperor came, and He gave him the Burning Blades legion, renowned for lightning-fast assaults, wielding swords and bringing fire. He taught his gene-sons the dual-blade discipline that he had been taught himself.
Adiral, the Grand Prometheal- The Grand Prometheal is the Burning Blades' equivalent of a Chapter Master, just a fancier title. By default, all Grand Prometheals carry the Chapter's most prized possessions, Evaryn and Nosious. Evaryn was one of the two swords Blaze carried, and Nosious was the shards of Xenosious re-forged into a new blade, after their Primarch's disappearance at the battle of Aevis. Previously to the Defence of Meeproj II, Adiral held the rank of Captain of the First Company.While the previous Grand Prometheal fought a Greater Daemon of Khorne, Adiral was pre-occupied battling some traitorous Bloodied Shards that threatened to force a new entrance for daemons to enter. He saw the Grand Prometheal get knocked off his feet, and as he ignited his jump pack to escape the daemon, the foul beast grabbed his foot, and slammed him into the ground, then proceeded to slay the Grand Prometheal. Rare, visual accounts say that when this occurred, Adiral fought with a rage unmatched by the Khornates, and after battling his way to the gloating Daemon, challenged it to a one-on-one battle. Picking up the dual swords, they fought for an hour, until the daemon, finally worn down by the attacks from the two Astartes, was finally able to be banished. Following the re-taking of the planet, he was promoted to the rank of Grand Prometheal, in a bitter-sweet victory. Feeling like he failed the previous Prometheal and the Emperor, he prays every night that one day, he may gain the chance to redeem himself, betraying the energetic facade that his waking hours holds.
Kieran Narvaez, Captain of the 1st Company- The current Captain of the first company is the maverick individual known as Kieran Narvaez. He is well-renowned within the Chapter for having intense levels of anger, something which has drawn the attention of Inquisitors. Furthermore, the sword he carries, The Sword of Darkness, is a large, two-handed broadsword, its surface a crimson red, and emanating a dark shroud. No heretic, nor daemon, has been able to withstand blows from this blade. It was crafted by I have Cancer... Kieran himself, raising further suspicion, although the Chaplains maintain that there is no presence of taint within his spirit. Unlike other Chapters of Space Marines, the Captain of the 1st Company of the Burning Blades need not march to war in suits of Terminator Armour. Their joy of rapid engagement, and of flight, means that to sacrifice their armour and jump pack for a suit of Terminator armour to be a cause of extreme threat. As such, he is trained in either the usage of both suits. Several accounts of his battlefield engagements show that his desire to slay the enemies of Mankind, he can push his brothers, even those in Terminator armour, to their extremes while charging, and cutting down fleeing foes. Previously to the engagement at Meeproj II, he was a veteran sergeant in one of the Vanguard Veteran squads, and promoted for his ability to lead his brothers to victory
Aarone, Captain of the 2nd Company- Aarone was the Captain of the 2nd before even before the Defence at Meeproj II, and denied the position of being elevated to Captain of the first company. He is well known of his abilities in battle, and just his blade is just as famous. The relic blade, crafted by the finest Chapter artisans, was initially crafted as a punishment to the foul xenos, by taking the blood of those that fall by the blade, and by a technology long lost, purify it, and rejuvenate the wielder. Rumours have surfaced that the blade has possibly been tainted after the Meeproj campaign, and that Aarone is a secret servant to the Dark Gods. His lack of mercy or remorse while slaying the heretics and xenos, however, show his loyalty is with Man.
Chaplain Auius- The Burning Blades' Master of Sanctity, and High Reclusiarch, he is a silent and foreboding figure. He wields an ancient crozius, that was crafted long ago for the Emperor once they returned to real-space. Upon learning that he was near-dead, he broke it, and left. Couple thousand years later, a Chapter artisan found the weapon, and re-forged it. It is an elongated crozius, and as such, can also be used two-handed to deliver stronger, more deadly blows.
Some more notes:
== I have Cancer...
== I know this is quite sloppy, I'm quite new to this whole wiki-edit thing. As my fluff is currently still a little baby, not yet solidly formed, expect some minor plot-holes, errors and future retcons.
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