Warcraft

This is a /v/ related article, which we tolerate because it's relevant and/or popular on /tg/... or we just can't be bothered to delete it.

This page is in need of cleanup. Srsly. It's a fucking mess.

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The Warcraft universe is a setting created by Blizzard Entertainment in 6 hours and 23 minutes, when Games Workshop decided that they don't want to make a fantasy strategy computer game with them anymore. Thus Blizzard took the main concept of Warhammer and created the game Warcraft. This was an okay RTS game back in the days, which featured orcs and humans fighting each other... well... just because they can.

Over the years, the setting was expanded to include elves, dorfs, trolls, ogres, and all kinds of generic fantasy creatures you can think of in the game Warcraft 2. It was a lot like the last game, but hey, it was still a pretty good game. It was a 90's game: The fluff was there if you went and read the manual, and if you didn't give a care about the story, you were also welcome to just play the game and send out your Footmen en masse for the fun of watching the fighting, or repeatedly click on them to listen to them say funny quotes.

When Blizzard employees were rich enough to afford weed instead of booze, they started to do weirder shit to the setting in Warcraft 3. Undead spiders and cow-people ripping off Native American culture started to roam the lands of Azeroth. Also it was the age when plot holes began to surface, but they were small and insignificant at that time. Units continued to have hilarious quotes.

All this shit culminated into World of Warcraft, which was initially planned as a spin-off, but got far more popular than the RTS games (so don't expect to ever see any more made), where time traveling immortal dragons are fighting with bugs created in the image of space bugs by an ancient deity while dimension-faring demon look-a-likes are furious that space-faring blood elves stole a creature of positive energy and are channeling it's powers so that they can become paladins and so on and so on. Since the majority of the players are 14 year old blizzardfags, no one really cares that in every single content patch the previous fluff is brutally raped or that the fluff is simply stupid. Consistency, what's that?

In fact, WoW is an experiment financed by the government to find out how much shit people can take or willfully deny. Speculations are that gnomish death knights will make people wonder at least a bit, but I'm much more pessimistic. OLOLLOLOLOL, Wrath has come and gone and no one questioned the existence of Gnome Death Knights. Fuck you, Warcraft.

The newest example of Warcraft's horrific experimentation are, in order; Tauren Paladin "Holy Cows," (although this was explained by having them draw not from The Light, but from the Sun Goddess. Didn't change any of the abilities though, which would have been a start) Night Elf hippies using environmentally unsafe arcane magic, Forsaken Hunters that can't eat what they kill, and Blood Elf "I broke a nail!" Warriors, (because elves all fall into that stereotype. See Legolas and Drizzt for examples.) and a faggoty emo dragon who has a ridiculous looking jaw and acts like an obnoxious kitteh. Time will tell whether or not people will call out Metzen on his bullshit.

Warcraft does have a boardgame, a tabletop RPG, and a trading card game, so it is not all /v/.

By the way, has anyone else noticed that Metzen looks kinda similar to a CERTAIN SOMEONE? In multiple ways bearing in mind Metzen's latest lore?

(Oh yes, I went there It's not like we care. You're not special, stop flattering yourself.)

See Also

• World of Warcraft: The Roleplaying Game