Noise Marines

"My Emperor's Children, what wonderful music they make."

--The Primarch Fulgrim on the eve of the Drop Site Massacre

"The loudest faggots in the Eye of Terror"

--Anonymous

Music is made one of Satan's most attractive agencies to ensnare souls; but, when turned to a good account, it is a blessing. When abused, it leads the unconsecrated to pride, vanity, and folly.

--Ellen G. White

Possibly the most derp thing of all of the grimderp things to come out of Games Workshop, the Noise Marines are Chaos Space Marines sworn to Slaanesh.

THINGS SHALL GET LOUD NOW!

You're slow buddies

On the Table Top

The Noise Marines are a strictly balanced choice. Much like any other troops in the Chaos codex, they are very balanced, so will be run off the table by the overpowered Wardian codices unless supported by other Warp-fueled goofiness. That aside, this unit is a less-played but very fun choice.

They come as basic marines, with +1 initiative and Fearless. Naturally, they get the edge on other Marines in close combat, especially a power-sword-equipped Noise Champion (the sergeant equivalent), despite being stereotyped as shooty. That said, you want to keep them as close-range support choices due to their special weapons.

Any model can upgrade to a Dubstep Gun Sonic Blaster (the new sound-laser guitars, which look like pipe-organ guns). They are profiled as Salvo 2/3 bolters with ignores cover, so be prepared to bring down the rain on massed infantry waves, and ignore cover saves. The Blastmaster (which looks like a long-barreled sonic blaster) shoots like an Assault 2 heavy Bolter, or as a small blast krak missile, and both firing modes also have Pinning, and ignores cover. Fun on many levels. The Noise Champion can be given an angry pipe organ/mic combo for a backpack, which spits out a S5, Ap3, Assault 1 Flamer, which is fantastic news for you and terrible news for anything near that champion.

The downside, of course, is balance. They are 17 points a model, +3 for Sonic Blasters, a Blastmaster costs +30 points, Champion comes by default for +10, his power weapon is +15, the Doom Siren (Angry Organ) is another +15 points, and you'll probably need a transport as well. Due to the salvo nature of their blasters they cannot shoot and charge the same turn, but sweet motherfucking Jesus, with ignore cover on all guns any cover campers (yes, i'm looking at YOU, blobguards) would be ROCKED out of the table the turn these guys comes in range. Their other problem is that they have some very stiff competition in the Troops and Elites section, and while their sonic weapons are nice, players wanting a good shooting unit will often prefer Obliterators or Chosen.

Tl;dr: The god of excess delivers to those that can afford it. For ideal results, chuck a team of Noise Marines in a Metal Box, get it within range, and drop the bass.