Eldar Knight

Move over Mon'keigh, your brutish Knights are nothing compared to the grace and FABULOUSNESS of our Knights and shining heels!

This article is about something that is considered by the overpowering majority of /tg/ to be fail. Expect huge amounts of derp and rage, punctuated by /tg/ extracting humor from it.

The Eldar Knights (Not to be confused with the Wraithknight although functionally they are practically the same thing.) are as their name implies, the Eldar equivalent of Imperial Knights. Due to the fact that they have never been updated (Although it can be argued that the Wraithknight is their spiritual successor) since the days of yore, their models have stayed looking as derpy as possible.

Overview

According to ye olde Fluff Eldar Knights are most commonly used by Exodite populations to defend their homeworlds, and are complex machines made of hardened Wraithbone. These machines were originally developed to help new Exodite colonies and Maiden Worlds survive against the hostile and grim conditions they faced. Eldar knight suits are controlled by a direct mind-link between the pilot and machine, much like Imperial Titans as aforementioned. However Eldar Knights also contain a Spirit stone which supplies the machine with a personality as well as a way for the Eldar pilot to avoid having their soul consumed by Slaanesh should they fall in battle ....which is extra convenient. The spirit stones of Eldar Knights are often ancient artifacts dating before The Fall.

In battle, Eldar knights are rapidly-moving war machines able to swiftly advance and lay down heavy fire to devastating effect. They are frequently used by Exodite populations to aid Craftworld Eldar armies, forging ahead of the main formation and attacking to secure an important position.

Much like Imperial Knights being organized around feudal houses, Eldar Knights are divided along Exodite Clans based from Maiden Worlds and Exodite Worlds. And unlike the Imperial Knights which fit with the whole neo-gothic art styles which complements both Feudal Worlds and actual Imperial Worlds. Eldar Knights ...completely destroys the stereotype of the space Amish that is the Exodites, their Dinosaurs and their whole "Thou shall not use advance technology like our hedonistic ancestors" shtick.

Armament

Eldar Knights are most frequently equipped with a Psychic Lance and Holo-field Shields. Specialist types also exist, often armed with large Scatter Lasers, Pulse Lasers, Bright Lances, and Sonic Weapons.

Types of Eldar Knights

There are three known types of Eldar Knights.

Fire Gale Knight

Watch it trip and fall.

These knights look more like they belong in a Victoria's secret magazine than they do on a battlefield, what with their stupid pose and their unnecessary huge high heeled boots. Possibly the gayest looking Eldar vehicle/unit/technology to ever come out of 40k and that is saying something to an army filled with phallic looking guns. Seriously, this thing looks like it will trip over with how ungainly it looks.

Armed with a Psychic Lance but can be equipped with a Pulse Laser. They seem to be the most 'balanced' of the Eldar Knights and seem to function quite close to that of the more badass Wraithknight cousins. The main role of these fashion-victim war machines is that of a highly adaptable and reliable walker; its slim and brittle frame allows it to squeeze in tight areas like forests and strike where tanks could not.

Of course, how this towering hunk of Faggotry is able to even walk on soft ground is a mystery, due to having the ridiculous high-heeled feet which undoubtedly creates a high surface pressure. It would be a miracle if this thing's feet does not sink to the ground every time it takes a step, and the worst thing you can do to a walker is to make it immobile.

They are also armed with holo-fields like most Eldar vehicles, making them even harder to target and hit though conventional auspex or other forms of targeting vision. But their slim frame do obviously make them as fragile as a stick.

Overall, these Exodites need to get a Wraithknight man...

Bright Stallion Knight

I shall show thee my Eldar chivalry!

A centaurin-esque knight and is by far the most practical looking of all Eldar Knights, than again its not really that much of an overall accomplishment. It is practical in a sense that its centaur like body allows for more stability and speed than the fucking model walker that is the Fire Gale or the brutishly top-heavy design of the Towering Destroyer. Is armed with a Psychic Lance but can replace it with a Pulse Laser or Bright Lance.

The Bright Stallion seem to be built for speed due to possessing four legs. This makes it the fastest of the knights of any race in particular. Its speed and mobility as well as its design means that the Bright Stallion is a cavalry vehicle on a titanic scale. Although why the Eldar decided to supersize a cavalry unit in battlefields that renders them pointless (Artillery and rapid firing weapons says fuck you to your horsies) is unknown.

They are also armed with holo-fields like most Eldar vehicles, making them even harder to target and hit though conventional auspex or other forms of targeting vision. But their slim frame do obviously make them as fragile as a stick.

Towering Destroyer

HULK ELDAR SMASH!

With a name that should go more in line with that of Khorne rather than a bunch of woodland creatures. The Towering Destroyer Knight is the most physically powerful and durable of all the Knights. More orientated towards close combat and tight-closed-in spaces more predominant in the dense jungles and forests of the Exodite's Maiden Worlds. Unlike the other two it has four arms both equipped with a complementary dose of FUCK YOUR SHIT UP! And thus is built like a tank.

The Towering Destroyer seems to be the most sluggish of the Eldar Knights due to its large bulk, unusual profile and heavy equipment. Because its apparent slowness, the Towering Destroyer as aforementioned, compensates this by being built like a tank. Their creation is possibly a reaction and an answer towards Imperial Knights who always likes to go in close and personnel. Not to mention Imperial Knights are far more durable than the walking candlestick known as the Fire Gale and carry enough firepower to render a cavalry charge like the Bright Stallion useless.

Their increased toughness and slow and sluggish speed means that the Towering Destroyer forego the holo-fields used by most Eldar vehicles, as it is quite pointless having these things on when your moving like an aged auntie.