Dreadknight: Difference between revisions
(→Rage) |
(→Rage) |
||
Line 16: | Line 16: | ||
The problem is that it is yet another special toy for the special snowflake Chapter, and it is one that doesn't have the decency to look sensibly designed. The pilot is completely exposed -- in fact, the save conferred by the armor is exactly that conferred by [[Terminator]] armor...which the pilot is clearly already wearing. And it doesn't even have a cockpit to protect the wearer, so a fairly experienced Eldar Ranger or a team of Tau sniper drones could just shoot the rider out of the flimsy harness. For fuck's sake, the [[Tau|weeaboo space communists]] know to keep their Battlesuits fully enclosed, why can't these assholes? <s>Of course, there IS an incredibly strong force field protecting the pilot which is explicitly mentioned, but reading is hard.</s> Stop making excuses, Matt. It still looks retarded and quite frankly we don't care how many <s>void shields</s> or penis enlargers it has. In fact, having shields only makes it even more "special", both in the [[Mary Sue]] sense and in the [[Derp|"short bus" sense]]. Time to explore Pandora... | The problem is that it is yet another special toy for the special snowflake Chapter, and it is one that doesn't have the decency to look sensibly designed. The pilot is completely exposed -- in fact, the save conferred by the armor is exactly that conferred by [[Terminator]] armor...which the pilot is clearly already wearing. And it doesn't even have a cockpit to protect the wearer, so a fairly experienced Eldar Ranger or a team of Tau sniper drones could just shoot the rider out of the flimsy harness. For fuck's sake, the [[Tau|weeaboo space communists]] know to keep their Battlesuits fully enclosed, why can't these assholes? <s>Of course, there IS an incredibly strong force field protecting the pilot which is explicitly mentioned, but reading is hard.</s> Stop making excuses, Matt. It still looks retarded and quite frankly we don't care how many <s>void shields</s> or penis enlargers it has. In fact, having shields only makes it even more "special", both in the [[Mary Sue]] sense and in the [[Derp|"short bus" sense]]. Time to explore Pandora... | ||
''*Shuffles up, coughs* Ahem. It's worth noting that the whole force-field thing is extra-retarded. The tl;dr version of why is simply this: Why the fuck doesn't the ENTIRE machine have this force-field? And if they can put a force-field onto an Astartes-sized individual...why don't they do that for ALL Grey Knights, then? (except that the description mentions that it might actually be some super secret technology that they can't actually replicate, though that'd mean there'd be a finite and very small number of Dreadknights actually around...) Given how ridiculously hard it is to produce the Knights, one would think increasing the survivability of all of them would be a good idea if this technology exists. Everything about the design is stupid, stupid, STUPID. They can't even be Void Shields because Void Shields require titanic amounts of energy to maintain, energy the Derpknight couldn't possibly even come CLOSE to power, especially given the fucking thing has GOD DAMN SMOKE STACKS ON IT as if it's some fucking steampunk combustion-powered thin! YEAH! IT DOESN'T EVEN USE THE FUCKING MICRO-REACTORS THAT STANDARD FUCKING POWER ARMOR USES! | ''*Shuffles up, coughs* Ahem. It's worth noting that the whole force-field thing is extra-retarded. The tl;dr version of why is simply this: Why the fuck doesn't the ENTIRE machine have this force-field? And if they can put a force-field onto an Astartes-sized individual...why don't they do that for ALL Grey Knights, then? (except that the description mentions that it might actually be some super secret technology that they can't actually replicate, though that'd mean there'd be a finite and very small number of Dreadknights actually around...) Given how ridiculously hard it is to produce the Knights, one would think increasing the survivability of all of them would be a good idea if this technology exists. Everything about the design is stupid, stupid, STUPID. They can't even be Void Shields because Void Shields require titanic amounts of energy to maintain, energy the Derpknight couldn't possibly even come CLOSE to power, especially given the fucking thing has GOD DAMN SMOKE STACKS ON IT as if it's some fucking steampunk combustion-powered thin! YEAH! IT DOESN'T EVEN USE THE FUCKING MICRO-REACTORS THAT STANDARD FUCKING POWER ARMOR USES! (It actually has a compact but powerful plasma reactor.) Fucking DUUUURRRR!! FUCK this thing's fluff is just retarded! If it weren't so effective/OP as it is on the tabletop nobody would fucking buy it. Seriously, the tolerance for this thing is basically one stat-point away from being something so heinous you'd never even consider it!'' | ||
It also has access to the personal teleporter. Which is odd, because the reason that Interceptors wear powered armour is that apparently a personal teleporter can't cope with the bulk of terminator plate. Unless you're wearing terminator plate <b>and</b> are strapped to a bloody massive wannabe gundam, which is apparently fine and dandy.... (Except, isn't it actually a relay of multiple teleporters wired together? Which, mind you, still doesn't make a hell of a lot of sense...) | It also has access to the personal teleporter. Which is odd, because the reason that Interceptors wear powered armour is that apparently a personal teleporter can't cope with the bulk of terminator plate. Unless you're wearing terminator plate <b>and</b> are strapped to a bloody massive wannabe gundam, which is apparently fine and dandy.... (Except, isn't it actually a relay of multiple teleporters wired together? Which, mind you, still doesn't make a hell of a lot of sense...) |
Revision as of 21:41, 20 July 2013
This article is about something that is considered by the overpowering majority of /tg/ to be fail. Expect huge amounts of derp and rage, punctuated by /tg/ extracting humor from it. |
This article or section involves Matthew Ward, Spiritual Liege, who is universally-reviled on /tg/. Because this article or section covers Ward's copious amounts of derp and rage, fans of the 40K series are advised that if they proceed onward, they will see fluff and crunch violation of a level rarely seen. |
"Yo dawg, I heard you like power armor, so I put power armor around your power armor so you can be armored while you're armored." -- Techmarine Xzibitus of the Grey Knights.
The Nemesis Dreadknight is a Grey Knight suit of armor that allows its wearer to go toe-to-toe with a Greater Daemon of Chaos on his own. Yes, the regular plot armor does have its limits, and even an above-strength chapter can't always send the hundreds of Battle Brothers that would normally be required to contain such a powerful daemon.
Wearers are recognized as being the most formidable of Knights; unfortunately for them, this means that they get stuck with the really dangerous missions.
Rage
The existence of the Dreadknight is not problematic in itself -- a Dreadnought-sized suit of armor that doesn't require the operator to be near-dead is a reasonable thing for a chapter to have. This is especially true for the Grey Knights, as they regularly take on massively powerful daemons with relatively few Knights, and prefer to let their battle-brothers have their eternal rest rather than keeping them half-alive in a Dreadnought.
The problem is that it is yet another special toy for the special snowflake Chapter, and it is one that doesn't have the decency to look sensibly designed. The pilot is completely exposed -- in fact, the save conferred by the armor is exactly that conferred by Terminator armor...which the pilot is clearly already wearing. And it doesn't even have a cockpit to protect the wearer, so a fairly experienced Eldar Ranger or a team of Tau sniper drones could just shoot the rider out of the flimsy harness. For fuck's sake, the weeaboo space communists know to keep their Battlesuits fully enclosed, why can't these assholes? Of course, there IS an incredibly strong force field protecting the pilot which is explicitly mentioned, but reading is hard. Stop making excuses, Matt. It still looks retarded and quite frankly we don't care how many void shields or penis enlargers it has. In fact, having shields only makes it even more "special", both in the Mary Sue sense and in the "short bus" sense. Time to explore Pandora...
*Shuffles up, coughs* Ahem. It's worth noting that the whole force-field thing is extra-retarded. The tl;dr version of why is simply this: Why the fuck doesn't the ENTIRE machine have this force-field? And if they can put a force-field onto an Astartes-sized individual...why don't they do that for ALL Grey Knights, then? (except that the description mentions that it might actually be some super secret technology that they can't actually replicate, though that'd mean there'd be a finite and very small number of Dreadknights actually around...) Given how ridiculously hard it is to produce the Knights, one would think increasing the survivability of all of them would be a good idea if this technology exists. Everything about the design is stupid, stupid, STUPID. They can't even be Void Shields because Void Shields require titanic amounts of energy to maintain, energy the Derpknight couldn't possibly even come CLOSE to power, especially given the fucking thing has GOD DAMN SMOKE STACKS ON IT as if it's some fucking steampunk combustion-powered thin! YEAH! IT DOESN'T EVEN USE THE FUCKING MICRO-REACTORS THAT STANDARD FUCKING POWER ARMOR USES! (It actually has a compact but powerful plasma reactor.) Fucking DUUUURRRR!! FUCK this thing's fluff is just retarded! If it weren't so effective/OP as it is on the tabletop nobody would fucking buy it. Seriously, the tolerance for this thing is basically one stat-point away from being something so heinous you'd never even consider it!
It also has access to the personal teleporter. Which is odd, because the reason that Interceptors wear powered armour is that apparently a personal teleporter can't cope with the bulk of terminator plate. Unless you're wearing terminator plate and are strapped to a bloody massive wannabe gundam, which is apparently fine and dandy.... (Except, isn't it actually a relay of multiple teleporters wired together? Which, mind you, still doesn't make a hell of a lot of sense...)
As a sidenote, this neckbeard has witnessed a local GK player modeling their Derpknight by attaching its limbs to the chassis of a dreadnaught to make it look somewhat less retarded. Bonus points for an Ironclad chassis, points off for the exposed-head Venerable chassis.
Gallery
-
In the grim, dark future, carrying babies is serious business.
-
It's like a one of those nesting dolls, but more retarded.
-
What the Dreadknight should ACTUALLY look like.