Chaos BBQ Cook-Off: Difference between revisions
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July | On the 12th of July of every year, the forces of Chaos are undivided long enough to participate in a yearly cook-off. | ||
Its a day of "games", concerts, orgies, and some damn good food. | Its a day of "games", concerts, orgies, and some damn good food. | ||
Each year the event takes place at the residence of a different | Each year the event takes place at the residence of a different [[Chaos God]], although every time [[Tzeentch]] hosts it everyone tends to get lost and so only he gets the food... [[Just as planned]]. | ||
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*There is also a just as popular "adopt" a [[daemonette]] booth. | *There is also a just as popular "adopt" a [[daemonette]] booth. | ||
*[[Slaanesh]] was quite pissed that his/her/ | *[[Slaanesh]] was quite pissed that his/her/its daemonettes lost in the beauty pageant to one of [[Khorne]]'s Khornettes. The Blood God laughed his ass off with [[Nurgle]], whose Nurgettes actually got second. | ||
*There is a raffle for an autographed '''picture of [[Doombreed]]'''.(Hint, hint [[GW]]!) | *There is a raffle for an autographed '''picture of [[Doombreed]]'''. (Hint, hint, [[GW]]!) | ||
*Never let one of the [[Thousand Sons]] near a cotton-candy machine, it isn't pretty. | *Never let one of the [[Thousand Sons]] near a cotton-candy machine, it isn't pretty. | ||
*Unless you're a | *Unless you're a worshiper of Nurgle, never try out "'''ANY'''" of their cuisines. Results aren't pretty and '''Very''' messy. | ||
*Unless you have a strong stomach, never try out "'''ANY'''" of [[Doomrider]]'s cooking. Whatever he cooks up has impossible amounts of Cocaine. | *Unless you have a strong stomach, never try out "'''ANY'''" of [[Doomrider]]'s cooking. Whatever he cooks up has impossible amounts of Cocaine. | ||
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*If you're [[Kaldor Draigo]], you know what to do. | *If you're [[Kaldor Draigo]], you know what to do. | ||
*If | *If you're even here, run fast, because [[Slaanesh]] will be after you quickly. | ||
*There is a talent show although the 'talents' on display are same year to year | *There is a talent show, although the 'talents' on display are basically the same year to year: Khorne tries to behead a greater number of people in one swing every time, Nurgle tries to make the best soup possible (not to be eaten, for Emprah's sake), Tzeentch tries to impress everyone with magic tricks, and Slaanesh tries for most orgasms in a row. | ||
*A guest singer is always 'invited' to the BBQ so the Gods can have some entertainment while they chow down on Imperial Guard burgers. | *A guest singer is always 'invited' to the BBQ so the Gods can have some entertainment while they chow down on Imperial Guard burgers. Alas, the singer never leaves the event alive, either being eaten/killed/tortured/made ill and dying/molested or any one of a dozen of things by one of the guests of the party. This year's choice of singer is currently being contested; Slaanesh wants boy-toy Justin Bieber while Tzeentch is wanting the changing tones of Rebecca Black. Naturally neither choice has gone down well with Khorne or Nurgle. | ||
*By common consent, [[Malal]] and the [[Sons of Malice]] are barred from the event although they always try to gatecrash. | *By common consent, [[Malal]] and the [[Sons of Malice]] are barred from the event, although they always try to gatecrash. | ||
*A booth teaching extra-dimensional paradox poker with the Emperor, the Deceiver, and Cegorach as guests is also open. A curtain of anti-matter covers the booth so casual onlookers won't have their brains melt out. | *A booth teaching extra-dimensional paradox poker with the Emperor, the Deceiver, and Cegorach as guests is also open. A curtain of anti-matter covers the booth so casual onlookers won't have their brains melt out. | ||
Revision as of 17:28, 21 October 2013
On the 12th of July of every year, the forces of Chaos are undivided long enough to participate in a yearly cook-off.
Its a day of "games", concerts, orgies, and some damn good food.
Each year the event takes place at the residence of a different Chaos God, although every time Tzeentch hosts it everyone tends to get lost and so only he gets the food... Just as planned.
Facts
- The most popular "game" at the event is "Toss the Guardsman". Kharn is still by far the crowd favorite. What a great guy.
- Tzeentch makes a mean BBQ chicken...No seriously that's the most pissed off chicken ever, you wouldn't blame him.
- There is a popular adopt a nurgling booth set up every year.
- There is also a just as popular "adopt" a daemonette booth.
- Slaanesh was quite pissed that his/her/its daemonettes lost in the beauty pageant to one of Khorne's Khornettes. The Blood God laughed his ass off with Nurgle, whose Nurgettes actually got second.
- Never let one of the Thousand Sons near a cotton-candy machine, it isn't pretty.
- Unless you're a worshiper of Nurgle, never try out "ANY" of their cuisines. Results aren't pretty and Very messy.
- Unless you have a strong stomach, never try out "ANY" of Doomrider's cooking. Whatever he cooks up has impossible amounts of Cocaine.
- If you're Kaldor Draigo, you know what to do.
- If you're even here, run fast, because Slaanesh will be after you quickly.
- There is a talent show, although the 'talents' on display are basically the same year to year: Khorne tries to behead a greater number of people in one swing every time, Nurgle tries to make the best soup possible (not to be eaten, for Emprah's sake), Tzeentch tries to impress everyone with magic tricks, and Slaanesh tries for most orgasms in a row.
- A guest singer is always 'invited' to the BBQ so the Gods can have some entertainment while they chow down on Imperial Guard burgers. Alas, the singer never leaves the event alive, either being eaten/killed/tortured/made ill and dying/molested or any one of a dozen of things by one of the guests of the party. This year's choice of singer is currently being contested; Slaanesh wants boy-toy Justin Bieber while Tzeentch is wanting the changing tones of Rebecca Black. Naturally neither choice has gone down well with Khorne or Nurgle.
- By common consent, Malal and the Sons of Malice are barred from the event, although they always try to gatecrash.
- A booth teaching extra-dimensional paradox poker with the Emperor, the Deceiver, and Cegorach as guests is also open. A curtain of anti-matter covers the booth so casual onlookers won't have their brains melt out.