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About the National Sexual Assault Telephone Hotline
{{sick|Do we really need to explain this one?}}
[[File:Raps Rapeseed Brassica napus.jpg|250px|thumb|right|The graceful Rapeseed Flower in a field.]]


The act of "rape" is by having an individual to perform a sexual act against their will, usually ending with the victim being ultimately powerless to fight off their aggressor(s); it's considered one of worst things one person can do to another, [[Skub|with numerous arguments placing it either above, next to or just below murder or forced mind-wiping]]. Its also the name of [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rapeseed a type of Canola].


In a proverbial sense that is common in the gaming community and more relevant to us, being "raped" is as situation where an individual finds themselves completely powerless and at the mercy of their opposition, often resulting in them just hoping that they can still get away in one piece after their aggressor(s) is/are done with them. In short, getting "raped" in the proverbial sense, is being utterly dominated by the opposition with no hope of relief.


==Examples of being proverbially raped==
* A 30 man unit of Slugga Boyz, within 6" of a Nob with a Waaagh! Banner and [[Ghazghkull Thraka]], buffed by Warpath, charging ANYTHING without a 2+ save.
*[[Slivers]]
*A Space Marine tactical squad against a Kastelan Robot Maniple.
*A shadowsword against a stompa without an invuln
*A stompa with an invuln
*Magnus the Red during the psychic phase.
*[[Angry Marines]] vs ANYTHING
*DEN  vs ANYTHING
*[[Kender]] caught stealing from a black dragon hoard
*An'ggrath vs a Falchion (can go either way depending on whether it's taking place at range or in melee)
*A unit of Khorne Berserkers against a Furioso Dreadnought
*An Intercessor squad against a Deff Dread
*Being within 5 <s>inches</s> <s>feet</s> <s>planets</s> systems of an [[Eversor|eversor assassin]] that has discovered cocaine.
*A haruspex/mutalith vs two snotlings.
*Deep Striking 600 points of Terminators 15 inches from a Plasma sponson equipped Leman Russ Executioner.
*Three full squads of laser destroyer rapiers vs a [[Grot Tanks|grot tank]].
*Anything without a good invunerable save going up against Thunderwolf Cavalry in melee
*A Dreadnought getting ambushed by 30 Tankbustas
*Pre-FAQ [[Anacharis Scoria]] vs [[Primarch|ANYTHING]].
**FAQ vs Anacharis Scoria.
*Anything, ANYTHING without Eternal Warrior against Sigismund or Constantin Valdor in a challenge.
*Anything on the table (other than Leman Russ) with Horus Lupercal, including the table itself.
*Ferrus Manus riding atop a Landraider Spartan like a surfer, repairing it, as he is shooting his assault weapons, before Swanton Bombing (look it up) into the nearest unit and smashing it with Forgebreaker.
*Konrad Curze against anything that's not immune to fear.
*A World Eaters player trying to out-assault a Space Wolves player.
**[[Warhammer 40,000 8th edition|HAH! NO LONGER!]] Have at thee, loyalist dog! Blood for the Blood God!
*Almost anything against a Thousand Sons Grand Coven
*Cadia at the end of Gathering Storm I
*Ahzek Ahriman, in a supreme command detachment with 4 psykers and Magnus against Custodes.
*Going against a Blood Angels army that fields more than 3 Death Company Dreadnoughts
*A squad of Grots facing down a [[Chaos]] [[Vindicator]].
*A unit of Custodian Guard against a Tau unit in melee combat.
*A Tau unit of any kind against anything that can enter melee combat. Even another Tau unit.
*A Tau unit armed with pulse carbines, led by a Fireblade, within 12" of an Ethereal, within 18" of ANYTHING.
*Damn near anything facing down a [[Dreadknight]].
*A ten-man squad of [[Companion|Hetaeron]] charging a lone Chaos cultist.
*A squad of [[Daemon]]s facing down a [[Grey Knight]] Terminator Squad.
*A single [[heresy|heretic]] against an [[Inquisition|Inquisitor Lord]].
*Anything within 6 inches of [[Abaddon|Abaddon the Despoiler]] that isn't a snowflake character (and even then only a handful are good enough to put brakes on Abby's rape train)
*Anything within 6 inches of [[Mephiston]].
*A squad of [[Imperial Guard|Imperial Guardsmen]] against a [[Dark Eldar]] raiding party. In more ways than one...
**The same scenario, in reverse, with [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jCMNWAJiz5Y SLYYYYYY MAAAAAAARBO]
*An [[Ork]] army facing a trio of [[Manticore Rocket Launcher]]s.
*A horde of [[Tyranid]] gaunts against a [[Land Raider]] Redeemer.
*Said landraider being shishkebabbed by 10 or more carnifexes
*A Dreadnought at standoff range against a trio of XV88 Battlesuits.
*A command Leman Russ Vanquisher with co-axial heavy stubber, artificer hull and monster-slayer shells against anything without solid invuln save.
*A [[Sisters of Battle]] Player in <del>5th</del> any Edition.
*A Sisters of Battle player vs Slanneshi Daemonettes
*Anything without a 2+ save deepstriking within 36 inches of a missleside squad.
*[[C'tan]] Shards have been on the giving and receiving end.
*Eldar when [[C.S.Goto|Goto]] is on the prowl.
*Warhammer 40K [[fluff]] and [[crunch]] at the hands of [[Matt Ward]].
*The [[Sisters of Battle]] at the grubby hands of [[Matt Ward]].
*Anything at the hands of [[Matt Ward]].
*An uppity [[PC]] against a grumpy [[GM]].
*[[Tomb of Horrors]]
*[[Tomb Kings]] before their recent update.
*[[Vlad von Carstein]] in [[Total War: WARHAMMER]].
*An oldschool [[Magic: The Gathering]] deck going up against any other deck sporting cards from ANY expansions in the last five years or so.
*Anything under the leadership of Abigail the Armless vs anything under the command of Creed.
*A troll talking to a fa/tg/uy.
*A unit of heretics being assaulted by a full unit of [[Honour Guard]] all equipped with relic blades.
*Any vehicle that is in the line of sight of a Hammerhead. (Bonus points if Longstrike is in it and he's facing down IG)
*What [[Fish of Fury]] used to be.
*What the Riptide is now.
*A table that was Made in China used by Ork, Tyranid and Guard players. Bonus points if using metal mini's or playing apocalypse
*Dark Eldar going up against Orks in Apocalypse.
*Tyranids going up against Dark Eldar in Apocalypse.
*Anything going up against Chaos Guard+Marines+Daemons combo in Apocalypse.
*[[Angron]] charging anything.
*Lorgar transfigured
*7E Magnus
*A plague marine fighter with the combat specialism, grandfather's blessing and a Flail of Corruption in melee against anything in Kill Team
*Deathwatch Frag Cannon in Kill Team.
*Being able to take 4 Deathwatch Frag Cannons in a single kill team in Kill Team.
*Adeptus Custodes in melee against ANYTHING (in kill team, 40k or 30k).
*Burna-boyz overwatching anything without terminator armor stupid enough to charge them.
*Wraithguard with D-scythes overwatching ''anything'', up to and including bio-titans
**D-Weapons in general if the Dice God favors a player that uses Codex Eldar: Craftworlds.
***What the Wraith Knight became in said Codex.
*<insertname>wing army facing a trio of Ectoplasma Forgefiends or Ion Riptide battlesuits
*Daemons vs [[Grey Knights]]
*Chaos Space Marines vs [[Grey Knights]]
*Anyone trying to outsmart - [[Creed|Hang on, what's that Titan doing there?]]
*Anyone within charge range of a Genestealer brood
*A Carnifex charging a Chimera
*The [[Swarmlord]].
**The [[Swarmlord|Swarmlord's]] rules in 6th and 7th
***Fuck it, [[Tyranid]] rules for 6th and 7th in general
*Imperator class battle titan.
*Necron mass flyer list vs anything but Imperial Guard with 18 hydras.
*Elysian mass flyer list vs ANYTHING.
*When Cultists are holding your objectives
*When Guardsmen are holding your objectives
*When Guardsmen are charging objectives
*Ollanius Pius when he put his Bass ass self between Papa Emps and Horus
*Warlord Titans
*When Daemons of Khorne are charging anything
*Skulltaker w/Juggernaut vs. Anything
*6th Edition <s>Vortex</s> [[Deathstrike Missile Launcher|Deathstrike Missile]] aimed at anything not in [[Terminator|Terminator Armour]].
*A Hierophant Biotitan with 3++ saves and feel no pain against ''anything''. 
*6th edition Tau.
*[[Dark Angels]] against [[Chaos]] Marines.
* Just about anything being charged by Blood/Chaos knights.
* <span style='color:green;font-size:100%'>DOZE SAME GITZ GETTIN' CHARGED BY BOARBOYZ. AH HA, DOSE UMIES DON'T GOT NUTHIN ON US!
* Anything in 8th against a proper Smash Captain and his command squad.
* Sly Marbo against pretty much everything.
* A trio of XV9's in a 1200 point game. (Preach on.)
* A Lord of Skulls reduced to one Hull Point, armed with a Great Cleaver of Khorne, going up against a Tau Ethereal
* Any army that Robin Cruddace doesn't like.
* Reapers from Mass Effect against the [[Doctor Who|Time Lords from Doctor Who.]]
* Anything from Sci-Fi against anything from the Marvel Pantheon of Gods.
* Anything worse than AP3 against an opponent who's playing a Siege Assault list. Re-rollable 3+ Armour Saves, for when being That Guy just isn't enough.
* Cypher against anything involving or relating to the Dark Angels.
* [[Chapter Master Smashfucker|Chapter Master Smashbane and Iron Father Smashfucker]] double teaming some poor sod.
* Anything getting charged by Skarbrand
*A Skaven Hell Pit Abomination getting right back up after dying.
*A Leman Russ Punisher staring down an Ork mob. Bonus points if Pask is commanding it.
*A Leman Russ Punisher with Pask against everything that isnt AV 14
*[[Nagash]]. Just. Nagash.
*[[Malekith]] as The Eternity King.
*A Knight Crusader in the shooting phase
*A Knight Gallant in the Fight phase
*Whenever Matt Ward touches WH40k
*An Umbra against any number of Imperial Guards/Cannon Fodder.
*Whenever a WH40k fanboy enters a forum regarding space Marines.
*Any sufficiently kitted out Death Star unit in 40K.
*Khorne Daemonkin army that just summoned six Bloodthirsters.
*[[Warlord Battle Titan|The "newest" addition to the fuck-you-mine's-bigger contest]]
*Anything from the fluff regarding the [[lamenters|lamenters]].
*Vintage deck playing against a standard deck.
*Trying to fight archaon in age of sigmar
*What happens to your brain when you read the rules for Age of Sigmar
* fighting a necrosphinx as with a monsterous creature.
*Anything that gets between an [[Eversor]] and it's target. <strike>Including</strike> {{BLAM|Especially!! Allies and Civilians HAHAHA WRYYYYY!!!}} What The..?? OH HOLY TERRA NOOO!! *Screams and Splattering noises*
*Cassian Dracos in Zone Mortalis.
*[[Awesome|WHEN THE SKAVEN BLEW UP THE MOON.]]
*[[Dark Angels|DARK ANGELS.]]
*Anything being attacked by army ants. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qOe5Lmyyxiw Here's a video of them killing a crab.]
*[[Sly Marbo]]
*Anything going up against a Thallax.
*Anything on the receiving end of a Skitarii Ranger (equiped with either a Galvanic Rifle or a Transuranic Arqebus, either one works really. Although an Arqebus could equate to an [[exterminatus]] if it hits the ground or the next planet in sight).
*KX139 Battlesuits.
*[[Leman Russ]] fighting anything in melee (including other Primarchs).
* [[Solar Auxilia]] LORD-MARSHAL and his entire force making Marines look like whiny pussies, being Ld10, Stubborn, and re-rolling 6 on Morale and Pinning Checks.
*[[Drazhar]] against anything, ANYTHING AT ALL not wearing armor. And a lot of things that are.
* [[Fist of the North Star|Kenshiro]] vs anything armored and unarmoured. Even MOTHERFUCKING BATTLE TANKS, BITCH.
*Longstrike firing at a single wound model with any kind of buff to his hit roll in 8th edition.
*Volcano Cannons in 8th edition.
*An army of only Carnifexes is now totally possible and somewhat viable
*A whole army made up entirely of [[Pyrovore]]s, about to die RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF YOUR OPPONENT'S ARMY.
*Ghazghkull Thraka with 90 Ork Boyz in 8E backed up with a Waaagh! Banner Nob.
*Everything in this list against Sly Marbo
*The fact that [[Sly Marbo|the one Imperial Guard motherfucker with the silly name]] is on this list 3 times (that’s not the only place he is)
*Roboute Guilliman
*The [[Nightbringer]], especially in 3rd edition and 9th edition.
*Any infantry of walker without a good anti personnel weapon vs a sufficiently large amount of IG. Seriously, enough shots shoots holes in SPACE MARINES. According to fluff anyway...
*20 Y'Vahra Battlesuits at far range without cover, vs 30 Basilisks behind cover, with a spotter with a vox. For context, Basklisks have AP3, Battlesuits, AS3. Yep. Fun fun!
*[[Vermintide|The Ubersreik 5]] against any skaven at any amount, even with a few Chaos Warriors, monsters like rat ogres or weapon teams mixed in.
*A [[Gorkanaut]] using a series of crush attacks with its claw on any nearby dreadnaut
*The Temple Gargant. Just... The Temple Gargant.
*Titans
*Warden Pattern Knights against blob armies
*Encountering a [[Vampire: The Masquerade|Methuselah.]]
*Encountering [[Atropus]] in a campaign. Its not just you getting raped, '''the whole world is'''.
* [[FATAL]]. A more literal version in this case <s>And a sexier version too</s> {{BLAM}} {{BLAM|'''''HERESY!'''''}}
*The [[Nightbringer]] against anything with an invuln and 3+ or worse save
* A [[Flayed Ones]] bomb with the [[Deceiver]] versus low leadership hordes.
* [[Eradicator|Eradicators]] versus anything. Seriously, what was GW thinking adding them in?
* Space Marines versus any sense of game balance.
*9th Edition Deathwing Terminators vs anything currently (Might as well suicide)
9th edition Drukhari vs anything (70% win rate jesus christ)
* <s>A single Wraithguard model</s> Anything without a Wounds lost per Phase limit (and isn't an Apocalypse unit) that gets charged by a full squad of Grey Knight Paladins with Nemesis Daemon Hammers, Hammerhand active, with a Paladin Ancient buffing them. 51 S8, AP-2, 3 Damage hitting on a 2+ (Ancient buff) and rerolling failed wounds. At that point, Words of Power or Tide of Convergence is just overkill.


Need help?
==A Tepid Defense of the Metaphor==
Call 800.656.HOPE (4673) to be connected with a trained staff member from a sexual assault service provider in your area.


How does it work?
Before you complain too much about this usage of the word "rape", realize that the metaphor was appealing for a series of reasons:
When you call 800.656.HOPE (4673), you’ll be routed to a local RAINN affiliate organization based on the first six digits of your phone number. Cell phone callers have the option to enter the ZIP code of their current location to more accurately locate the nearest sexual assault service provider.


Telephone Hotline Terms of Service
* The absolute helplessness associated with both the gaming situations in question and the real life phenomena.
* The parallel of "there is no way out of this except either the mercy of the abuser, outside interference, or not getting into that situation in the first place".
* The sense that the abuser is a bad person, and a system that allows the situation to happen repeatedly is either flawed, bad, or evil.
* "Ambush" and "Murder" both have a sense or implication of premeditation, whereas it is common for the gaming situations in question to arise by some combination of luck and bad decision-making by the victim.
* "Massacre", the other obvious alternative, also has an implication that "more than three people die" (and is usually only used in real life for events where more than 5 people die), which means that it's not that great for cases where there's only a single victim of the "massacre" (as is common in RPGs like D&D), or the "victim" more or less survives.


We could go on, but those should give at least ''some'' idea of why the temptation to use "rape" to describe anything along the lines of a critical failure on a [[Non Armor Defenses#Save_or_Die.2FSave_or_Suck |Save or Die]] roll existed and still exists. That being said, yeah, many items on the "examples" list above are not that great. This page exists mainly to be used as a joke link on other pages, just like [[Awesome]], [[Fail]], [[Derp]], and [[What]], and to help people understand that, for example, when your [[Guardian]] Squad is caught within melee distance of a [[Maulerfiend]], then yeah, they're about to have a very bad time.


How can the hotline help me?
==See also==
Calling the National Sexual Assault Hotline gives you access to a range of free services including:
*[[Anal circumference]]
*<s>For those who came here looking for something else, it's [[Rape of an Eldar|here]].</s>{{BLAM|'''''Nice try Slaaneshi cultist! *BLAM*'''''}}


Confidential support from a trained staff member
==Gallery==
Support finding a local health facility that is trained to care for survivors of sexual assault and offers services like sexual assault forensic exams
<center>
Someone to help you talk through what happened
<gallery>
Local resources that can assist with your next steps toward healing and recovery
File:40lb box.jpeg|Now ships overnight.
Referrals for long term support in your area
File:Sudoku_Bear_Rape.jpg
Information about the laws in your community
Basic information about medical concerns
Is it confidential?
The National Sexual Assault Hotline is a safe, confidential service. When you call the hotline, only the first six numbers of the phone number are used to route the call, and your complete phone number is never stored in our system. Most states do have laws that require local staff to contact authorities in certain situations, like if there is a child or vulnerable adult who is in danger.


While almost all callers are connected directly to a staff member or volunteer at a local sexual assault service provider, a handful of providers use an answering service after daytime business hours. This service helps manage the flow of calls. If all staff members are busy, you may choose to leave a phone number with the answering service. In this case, the number will be confidential and will be given directly to the organization’s staff member for a callback. If you reach an answering service, you can try calling back after some time has passed, or you can choose to call during regular business hours when more staff members are available. You can also access 24/7 help online by visiting online.rainn.org.
</gallery>
</center>


Who are the sexual assault service providers?
[[Category:Gamer Slang]][[Category:Not related]][[Category:Meme]]
Sexual assault service providers are organizations or agencies dedicated to supporting survivors of sexual assault. The providers who answer calls placed to the hotline are known as RAINN affiliates. To be part of the National Sexual Assault Hotline, affiliates must agree to uphold RAINN’s confidentiality standards. That means:
 
Never releasing records or information about the call without the consent of the caller, except when obligated by law
Only making reports to the police or other agencies when the caller consents, unless obligated by law
Agreeing to RAINN’s non-discrimination policy
To learn more about how a provider can become an affiliate of the National Sexual Assault Hotline, visit the Sexual Assault Service Provider information page. Volunteer opportunities for the National Sexual Assault Hotline are coordinated through these local providers. Search for volunteer opportunities near you.
 
How was the National Sexual Assault Hotline created?
The National Sexual Assault Hotline was the nation’s first decentralized hotline, connecting those in need with help in their local communities. It’s made up of a network of independent sexual assault service providers, vetted by RAINN, who answer calls to a single, nationwide hotline number. Since it was first created in 1994, the National Sexual Assault Hotline (800.656.HOPE and online.rainn.org) has helped more than 3 million people affected by sexual violence.
 
Before the telephone hotline was created, there was no central place where survivors could get help. Local sexual assault services providers were well equipped to handle support services, but the lack of a national hotline meant the issue did not receive as much attention as it should. In response, RAINN developed a unique national hotline system to combine all the advantages of a national organization with all the abilities and expertise of local programs. One nationwide hotline number makes it easier for survivors to be connected with the help they deserve.
 
Anyone affected by sexual assault, whether it happened to you or someone you care about, can find support on the National Sexual Assault Hotline. You can also visit online.rainn.org to receive support via confidential online chat.
 
 
 
Truly elevating, truly healing. No words to express my gratitude—you made it all such a pleasant experience. I celebrate you and thank you.
BRAD, SURVIVOR
We’re here when you need us.
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Latest revision as of 10:22, 22 June 2023

The graceful Rapeseed Flower in a field.

The act of "rape" is by having an individual to perform a sexual act against their will, usually ending with the victim being ultimately powerless to fight off their aggressor(s); it's considered one of worst things one person can do to another, with numerous arguments placing it either above, next to or just below murder or forced mind-wiping. Its also the name of a type of Canola.

In a proverbial sense that is common in the gaming community and more relevant to us, being "raped" is as situation where an individual finds themselves completely powerless and at the mercy of their opposition, often resulting in them just hoping that they can still get away in one piece after their aggressor(s) is/are done with them. In short, getting "raped" in the proverbial sense, is being utterly dominated by the opposition with no hope of relief.

Examples of being proverbially raped[edit]

  • A 30 man unit of Slugga Boyz, within 6" of a Nob with a Waaagh! Banner and Ghazghkull Thraka, buffed by Warpath, charging ANYTHING without a 2+ save.
  • Slivers
  • A Space Marine tactical squad against a Kastelan Robot Maniple.
  • A shadowsword against a stompa without an invuln
  • A stompa with an invuln
  • Magnus the Red during the psychic phase.
  • Angry Marines vs ANYTHING
  • DEN vs ANYTHING
  • Kender caught stealing from a black dragon hoard
  • An'ggrath vs a Falchion (can go either way depending on whether it's taking place at range or in melee)
  • A unit of Khorne Berserkers against a Furioso Dreadnought
  • An Intercessor squad against a Deff Dread
  • Being within 5 inches feet planets systems of an eversor assassin that has discovered cocaine.
  • A haruspex/mutalith vs two snotlings.
  • Deep Striking 600 points of Terminators 15 inches from a Plasma sponson equipped Leman Russ Executioner.
  • Three full squads of laser destroyer rapiers vs a grot tank.
  • Anything without a good invunerable save going up against Thunderwolf Cavalry in melee
  • A Dreadnought getting ambushed by 30 Tankbustas
  • Pre-FAQ Anacharis Scoria vs ANYTHING.
    • FAQ vs Anacharis Scoria.
  • Anything, ANYTHING without Eternal Warrior against Sigismund or Constantin Valdor in a challenge.
  • Anything on the table (other than Leman Russ) with Horus Lupercal, including the table itself.
  • Ferrus Manus riding atop a Landraider Spartan like a surfer, repairing it, as he is shooting his assault weapons, before Swanton Bombing (look it up) into the nearest unit and smashing it with Forgebreaker.
  • Konrad Curze against anything that's not immune to fear.
  • A World Eaters player trying to out-assault a Space Wolves player.
  • Almost anything against a Thousand Sons Grand Coven
  • Cadia at the end of Gathering Storm I
  • Ahzek Ahriman, in a supreme command detachment with 4 psykers and Magnus against Custodes.
  • Going against a Blood Angels army that fields more than 3 Death Company Dreadnoughts
  • A squad of Grots facing down a Chaos Vindicator.
  • A unit of Custodian Guard against a Tau unit in melee combat.
  • A Tau unit of any kind against anything that can enter melee combat. Even another Tau unit.
  • A Tau unit armed with pulse carbines, led by a Fireblade, within 12" of an Ethereal, within 18" of ANYTHING.
  • Damn near anything facing down a Dreadknight.
  • A ten-man squad of Hetaeron charging a lone Chaos cultist.
  • A squad of Daemons facing down a Grey Knight Terminator Squad.
  • A single heretic against an Inquisitor Lord.
  • Anything within 6 inches of Abaddon the Despoiler that isn't a snowflake character (and even then only a handful are good enough to put brakes on Abby's rape train)
  • Anything within 6 inches of Mephiston.
  • A squad of Imperial Guardsmen against a Dark Eldar raiding party. In more ways than one...
  • An Ork army facing a trio of Manticore Rocket Launchers.
  • A horde of Tyranid gaunts against a Land Raider Redeemer.
  • Said landraider being shishkebabbed by 10 or more carnifexes
  • A Dreadnought at standoff range against a trio of XV88 Battlesuits.
  • A command Leman Russ Vanquisher with co-axial heavy stubber, artificer hull and monster-slayer shells against anything without solid invuln save.
  • A Sisters of Battle Player in 5th any Edition.
  • A Sisters of Battle player vs Slanneshi Daemonettes
  • Anything without a 2+ save deepstriking within 36 inches of a missleside squad.
  • C'tan Shards have been on the giving and receiving end.
  • Eldar when Goto is on the prowl.
  • Warhammer 40K fluff and crunch at the hands of Matt Ward.
  • The Sisters of Battle at the grubby hands of Matt Ward.
  • Anything at the hands of Matt Ward.
  • An uppity PC against a grumpy GM.
  • Tomb of Horrors
  • Tomb Kings before their recent update.
  • Vlad von Carstein in Total War: WARHAMMER.
  • An oldschool Magic: The Gathering deck going up against any other deck sporting cards from ANY expansions in the last five years or so.
  • Anything under the leadership of Abigail the Armless vs anything under the command of Creed.
  • A troll talking to a fa/tg/uy.
  • A unit of heretics being assaulted by a full unit of Honour Guard all equipped with relic blades.
  • Any vehicle that is in the line of sight of a Hammerhead. (Bonus points if Longstrike is in it and he's facing down IG)
  • What Fish of Fury used to be.
  • What the Riptide is now.
  • A table that was Made in China used by Ork, Tyranid and Guard players. Bonus points if using metal mini's or playing apocalypse
  • Dark Eldar going up against Orks in Apocalypse.
  • Tyranids going up against Dark Eldar in Apocalypse.
  • Anything going up against Chaos Guard+Marines+Daemons combo in Apocalypse.
  • Angron charging anything.
  • Lorgar transfigured
  • 7E Magnus
  • A plague marine fighter with the combat specialism, grandfather's blessing and a Flail of Corruption in melee against anything in Kill Team
  • Deathwatch Frag Cannon in Kill Team.
  • Being able to take 4 Deathwatch Frag Cannons in a single kill team in Kill Team.
  • Adeptus Custodes in melee against ANYTHING (in kill team, 40k or 30k).
  • Burna-boyz overwatching anything without terminator armor stupid enough to charge them.
  • Wraithguard with D-scythes overwatching anything, up to and including bio-titans
    • D-Weapons in general if the Dice God favors a player that uses Codex Eldar: Craftworlds.
      • What the Wraith Knight became in said Codex.
  • <insertname>wing army facing a trio of Ectoplasma Forgefiends or Ion Riptide battlesuits
  • Daemons vs Grey Knights
  • Chaos Space Marines vs Grey Knights
  • Anyone trying to outsmart - Hang on, what's that Titan doing there?
  • Anyone within charge range of a Genestealer brood
  • A Carnifex charging a Chimera
  • The Swarmlord.
  • Imperator class battle titan.
  • Necron mass flyer list vs anything but Imperial Guard with 18 hydras.
  • Elysian mass flyer list vs ANYTHING.
  • When Cultists are holding your objectives
  • When Guardsmen are holding your objectives
  • When Guardsmen are charging objectives
  • Ollanius Pius when he put his Bass ass self between Papa Emps and Horus
  • Warlord Titans
  • When Daemons of Khorne are charging anything
  • Skulltaker w/Juggernaut vs. Anything
  • 6th Edition Vortex Deathstrike Missile aimed at anything not in Terminator Armour.
  • A Hierophant Biotitan with 3++ saves and feel no pain against anything.
  • 6th edition Tau.
  • Dark Angels against Chaos Marines.
  • Just about anything being charged by Blood/Chaos knights.
  • DOZE SAME GITZ GETTIN' CHARGED BY BOARBOYZ. AH HA, DOSE UMIES DON'T GOT NUTHIN ON US!
  • Anything in 8th against a proper Smash Captain and his command squad.
  • Sly Marbo against pretty much everything.
  • A trio of XV9's in a 1200 point game. (Preach on.)
  • A Lord of Skulls reduced to one Hull Point, armed with a Great Cleaver of Khorne, going up against a Tau Ethereal
  • Any army that Robin Cruddace doesn't like.
  • Reapers from Mass Effect against the Time Lords from Doctor Who.
  • Anything from Sci-Fi against anything from the Marvel Pantheon of Gods.
  • Anything worse than AP3 against an opponent who's playing a Siege Assault list. Re-rollable 3+ Armour Saves, for when being That Guy just isn't enough.
  • Cypher against anything involving or relating to the Dark Angels.
  • Chapter Master Smashbane and Iron Father Smashfucker double teaming some poor sod.
  • Anything getting charged by Skarbrand
  • A Skaven Hell Pit Abomination getting right back up after dying.
  • A Leman Russ Punisher staring down an Ork mob. Bonus points if Pask is commanding it.
  • A Leman Russ Punisher with Pask against everything that isnt AV 14
  • Nagash. Just. Nagash.
  • Malekith as The Eternity King.
  • A Knight Crusader in the shooting phase
  • A Knight Gallant in the Fight phase
  • Whenever Matt Ward touches WH40k
  • An Umbra against any number of Imperial Guards/Cannon Fodder.
  • Whenever a WH40k fanboy enters a forum regarding space Marines.
  • Any sufficiently kitted out Death Star unit in 40K.
  • Khorne Daemonkin army that just summoned six Bloodthirsters.
  • The "newest" addition to the fuck-you-mine's-bigger contest
  • Anything from the fluff regarding the lamenters.
  • Vintage deck playing against a standard deck.
  • Trying to fight archaon in age of sigmar
  • What happens to your brain when you read the rules for Age of Sigmar
  • fighting a necrosphinx as with a monsterous creature.
  • Anything that gets between an Eversor and it's target. Including Especially!! Allies and Civilians HAHAHA WRYYYYY!!! What The..?? OH HOLY TERRA NOOO!! *Screams and Splattering noises*
  • Cassian Dracos in Zone Mortalis.
  • WHEN THE SKAVEN BLEW UP THE MOON.
  • DARK ANGELS.
  • Anything being attacked by army ants. Here's a video of them killing a crab.
  • Sly Marbo
  • Anything going up against a Thallax.
  • Anything on the receiving end of a Skitarii Ranger (equiped with either a Galvanic Rifle or a Transuranic Arqebus, either one works really. Although an Arqebus could equate to an exterminatus if it hits the ground or the next planet in sight).
  • KX139 Battlesuits.
  • Leman Russ fighting anything in melee (including other Primarchs).
  • Solar Auxilia LORD-MARSHAL and his entire force making Marines look like whiny pussies, being Ld10, Stubborn, and re-rolling 6 on Morale and Pinning Checks.
  • Drazhar against anything, ANYTHING AT ALL not wearing armor. And a lot of things that are.
  • Kenshiro vs anything armored and unarmoured. Even MOTHERFUCKING BATTLE TANKS, BITCH.
  • Longstrike firing at a single wound model with any kind of buff to his hit roll in 8th edition.
  • Volcano Cannons in 8th edition.
  • An army of only Carnifexes is now totally possible and somewhat viable
  • A whole army made up entirely of Pyrovores, about to die RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF YOUR OPPONENT'S ARMY.
  • Ghazghkull Thraka with 90 Ork Boyz in 8E backed up with a Waaagh! Banner Nob.
  • Everything in this list against Sly Marbo
  • The fact that the one Imperial Guard motherfucker with the silly name is on this list 3 times (that’s not the only place he is)
  • Roboute Guilliman
  • The Nightbringer, especially in 3rd edition and 9th edition.
  • Any infantry of walker without a good anti personnel weapon vs a sufficiently large amount of IG. Seriously, enough shots shoots holes in SPACE MARINES. According to fluff anyway...
  • 20 Y'Vahra Battlesuits at far range without cover, vs 30 Basilisks behind cover, with a spotter with a vox. For context, Basklisks have AP3, Battlesuits, AS3. Yep. Fun fun!
  • The Ubersreik 5 against any skaven at any amount, even with a few Chaos Warriors, monsters like rat ogres or weapon teams mixed in.
  • A Gorkanaut using a series of crush attacks with its claw on any nearby dreadnaut
  • The Temple Gargant. Just... The Temple Gargant.
  • Titans
  • Warden Pattern Knights against blob armies
  • Encountering a Methuselah.
  • Encountering Atropus in a campaign. Its not just you getting raped, the whole world is.
  • FATAL. A more literal version in this case And a sexier version too *BLAM* HERESY!
  • The Nightbringer against anything with an invuln and 3+ or worse save
  • A Flayed Ones bomb with the Deceiver versus low leadership hordes.
  • Eradicators versus anything. Seriously, what was GW thinking adding them in?
  • Space Marines versus any sense of game balance.
  • 9th Edition Deathwing Terminators vs anything currently (Might as well suicide)

9th edition Drukhari vs anything (70% win rate jesus christ)

  • A single Wraithguard model Anything without a Wounds lost per Phase limit (and isn't an Apocalypse unit) that gets charged by a full squad of Grey Knight Paladins with Nemesis Daemon Hammers, Hammerhand active, with a Paladin Ancient buffing them. 51 S8, AP-2, 3 Damage hitting on a 2+ (Ancient buff) and rerolling failed wounds. At that point, Words of Power or Tide of Convergence is just overkill.

A Tepid Defense of the Metaphor[edit]

Before you complain too much about this usage of the word "rape", realize that the metaphor was appealing for a series of reasons:

  • The absolute helplessness associated with both the gaming situations in question and the real life phenomena.
  • The parallel of "there is no way out of this except either the mercy of the abuser, outside interference, or not getting into that situation in the first place".
  • The sense that the abuser is a bad person, and a system that allows the situation to happen repeatedly is either flawed, bad, or evil.
  • "Ambush" and "Murder" both have a sense or implication of premeditation, whereas it is common for the gaming situations in question to arise by some combination of luck and bad decision-making by the victim.
  • "Massacre", the other obvious alternative, also has an implication that "more than three people die" (and is usually only used in real life for events where more than 5 people die), which means that it's not that great for cases where there's only a single victim of the "massacre" (as is common in RPGs like D&D), or the "victim" more or less survives.

We could go on, but those should give at least some idea of why the temptation to use "rape" to describe anything along the lines of a critical failure on a Save or Die roll existed and still exists. That being said, yeah, many items on the "examples" list above are not that great. This page exists mainly to be used as a joke link on other pages, just like Awesome, Fail, Derp, and What, and to help people understand that, for example, when your Guardian Squad is caught within melee distance of a Maulerfiend, then yeah, they're about to have a very bad time.

See also[edit]

  • Anal circumference
  • For those who came here looking for something else, it's here.Nice try Slaaneshi cultist! *BLAM*

Gallery[edit]

  • Now ships overnight.

    Now ships overnight.

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