Editing Order of the Stick (section)

===Antagonists===
====The Snarl====
Backstory time.  In the beginning of the universe, four pantheons of gods came together to create a world, but they had disagreements with each other over what the world should be like and the threads of creation became tangled together and created a god killing monster that attacked and completely wiped out one of the pantheons.  The remaining gods created a new world to act a prison for the Snarl, but the prison was flawed and rifts in space time began to open leading to the Snarl, who promptly started tearing apart everything and everyone around it, body and soul.  A group of heroes sealed the rifts away with magical gates before immediately imploding into petty squabbles and rivalries, nonetheless keeping it contained. Taking control of the gates and therefore the Snarl is Team Evil's goal, although they all have very different ideas of who exactly will do the controlling and what controlling it will mean.

====Team Evil====
* Xykon the formerly human [[lich]]. An [[epic]] level [[sorcerer]], Xykon is bored out of his skull and as such toys around with holes in reality that serve as gates to [[Warp|a dimension containing a world-eating Snarl]]. Used to be Redcloak's pawn and henchman as the magical equivalent of a stupid brute, until the intelligence and wisdom boosts from being lich-i-fied gave him the brains to snap any kind of controls his former master could put on him, (or at least thinks that he has). Doesn't like [[wizard]]s because they were condescending to him during his life, and likes beating the shit out of them with his ability to cast spells over and over again  (like Energy Drain). He is wholly and unapologetically evil, and [[Eldrad|kind of a dick]], but he's still kind of funny because his charisma is through the fucking roof (as a sorcerer, it kinda has to be).  In fact, the author purposefully avoided giving him a sympathetic backstory in the prequel book so that readers wouldn't see him as any less evil, unlike Redcloak who does a sympathetic motivation for evil.
* Redcloak the [[goblin]] [[cleric]] and high priest of the Dark One, a goblin hero turned god outraged by what he sees as a divine conspiracy to use his people as XP fodder for other races. Xykon's main henchgoblin and ruler of a major goblin tribe and later also the leader of a much larger hobgoblin army, Redcloak is the guy who's told to "get it done". And hoo boy, does he get it done. He murders the resistance to his people's occupation of a major city, has another of Xykon's servants eaten by her own wights and reveals that he was using Xykon from the beginning for the good of his people, all in the span of a half dozen pages.  Has a lot of backstory in the prequel comic, but you have to pay for it so f*#$ that noise. ''During'' the comic, he grows out of his racism towards hobgoblins, and is generally the cool, logical, rules-nerd left brain to his boss's impulsive, screwball right brain.  He gets his name from the Crimson Mantle he wears, which is an artifact created by the Dark One that grants the goblin that wears it knowledge of the plan to take control of the Snarl, as well as an extended lifespan.  He has never revealed his original name because Xykon hates long names. Although superficially more reasonable and rational than his evil boss, Redcloak is also very guilty of moral cowardice and egotism, on some level wanting to be right more than he actually wants to help his people, something Durkon astutely sums up as being right about what's wrong but wrong about how to make it right.
* The Monster in the Darkness is a creature of many mysteries and few truths. All we know that it has two yellow eyes and acts even stupider than Elan. It also is stupidly powerful: it can punch people so far they are launched into the sky; it stomping on the ground is powerful enough to cause localized earthquakes; and it can teleport people with but a word and a thought.  Has the personality of a child (a non-evil one).  After extended contact with O-Chul, has begun to think for himself, discovering, to his own surprise, that he is actually ''extremely'' intelligent and doesn't ''want'' Team Evil to win, and so has begun subtly undermining their efforts from within, something that has been enormously successful because none of his teammates see it coming or expect him to do ''anything'' smart.  [https://forums.giantitp.com/showthread.php?646977-MITD-Sweet-XVI-and-Never-Been-Guessed If you think you've got the brains, feel free to jump on the ride that never ends and try to follow the breadcrumbs and figure out what he is.]  We'll wait.  [[Troll| Remember to only pick ones with Trenchant Political Analysis as a listed special attack!]]
* Tsukiko, a mystic theurge. A necrophile necromancer with a crush on Xykon (which grossed <i>him</i> out) and also a parody of the [[Mary Sue]] archetype. She was in charge of the wight brigade until she discovered Redcloak's plan to double-cross Xykon, which got her eaten by her own wights for her troubles. Ultimately a somewhat tragic figure; in the end, she was just a stupid teenager assuming the opposite of the society she hated had to be right and was just desperate to be loved, something the Monster in the Darkness points out while noting that he's literally the only one who cares that Redcloak killed her.
* Beastmistress Oona, a [[bugbear]] of ambiguous class (although popular fan money's on the "beast heart adept"). Extremely cheery and friendly, she speaks entirely in broken "foreigner" English and is known to lavish unexpected bone-crunching hugs and headpats when least expected. She's part of a clan of bugbears that lives outside of a dungeon whose self-replenishing monstrous inhabitants they essentially farm for powerful magical spell materials, and is helping out Team Evil mostly so she can get them going on their way sooner rather than later and make sure there's still a dungeon for them to farm in when it's over. Controls her many beastly and magical beastly minions through positive reinforcement and mutual respect, up to and including the jars full of bees she uses like makeshift hand grenades. Despite being a silly character and source of great comic relief, Oona is far more intelligent and perceptive than her broken English and cheerful personality would imply, and has got an extremely clear-eyed perspective on what's actually going on within Team Evil. Her major beast minions have so far included Lancer, an arctic variant of a yrthak, and Greyview, an hilariously morose and gloomy warg who uses all its dialogue to express nihilistic viewpoints.

====The Linear Guild====
* Started out as evil counterparts of the PCs (which was deliberately done by their leader, Elan's twin brother Nale (get it? Nale is Elan backwards!)). The Guild consists of three core members plus two other slots that keep having replacements due to death or quitting:
** Nale, a Fighter-Rogue-Sorcerer multiclass specializing in enchantment, which is, if you didn't notice, basically a [[bard]] only [[Tzeentch|more complicated]] and capable of being Lawful Evil. This tells you a great deal about Nale's personality. Is permanently dead; he was stabbed by his father and was subsequently disintegrated for murdering Malack and rejecting his father's attempt to reconcile.
** Sabine, a [[succubus]] and Nale's lover with whom she shares a deep and fulfilling relationship based on human sacrifice.  Is currently stuck somewhere in the Lower Planes, trying to get revenge on her boyfriend's murderer, and since Thog is also probably dead she the last member not to die or quit.
** Thog, a [[Half-Orc]] [[barbarian]]/[[fighter]] (but only for a dip on that second one; even someone as stupid as Thog knew taking more than a few fighter levels was for suckers and he's got the dungeoncrusher alternate class feature too) who's part of the Dumbass Triumvirate alongside Elan and the Monster in the Darkness, and like them he sometimes expresses moments of startling and funny insight and erudition. Unlike either of them, Thog is ''not'' a good person; his cheery demeanor masks a sociopathic and childish delight in breaking things and people. He talks like the Incredible Hulk, and turns more green when he activates his rage.  Although unconfirmed, he likely is dead after Roy tricked him into collapsing a ceiling on himself, burying him under a ton of rubble.
* On the four different occasions the teams have clashed the Linear Guild employed a subset of the following people:
* '''First Encounter'''
** Zz'Dtri, the [[drow]] wizard. An obvious copy of [[Drizzt]], he was hauled off by the lawyers of [[Wizards of the Coast]] for being an obvious [[Drizzt]] copy. [[Wat|Yes, that happened]]. Later returned ([[Wat|because he was a parody, not a copy, protected speech bitches!]]) and clashed with V using all the interim levels to tailor his build just for fighting the wizard, mostly by boosting his innate spell resistance. This did him no good against Durkon, the party cleric, particularly with that vampire strength boost. Currently dead.
** Hilgya Firehelm, a dwarven cleric of [[Troll|Loki]] who fucked, fought with, and fled from Durkon during the Guild's first encounter with the Order, in that approximate order. Reappeared after over 1000 strips to save the party from a vampire horde in the nick of time, intending to get revenge on Durkon, then fled for the Outer Planes when it became clear the world has a good chance of going up in flames soon. Has a self-serving memory, believing everyone around her is selfish and taking advantage of her when she's one of the most selfish beings on the planet. Brought Durkon's baby into the battle in a papoose [[Dwarf_Fortress|like a true dorf]].
** Yikyik the [[kobold]] ranger. Was beheaded by Belkar and turned into a [[hat]]. Currently dead.
* '''Second Encounter'''
** Pompey the [[half-elf]] wizard (get it? Pompey and Vaarsuvius are named after Pompeii and Vesuvius!  We're clever). Had a crush on Roy's sister and teamed up with the Linear Guild so that he could have her, but he was defeated, imprisoned, and then escaped, signing on with Leeky. Has not been seen since.
** Leeky Windstaff the [[gnome]] [[druid]]. Turned into a giant monster and rampaged through a city (get it? [[CoDzilla]]!) before being defeated by Durkon and escaping alongside Pompey.
** Yokyok, son of Yikyik. A parody of [[The Princess Bride|Inigo Montoya]] who attacked Belkar for... oh do I even have to say it? Belkar was under a curse preventing him from killing, so he set a tavern full of [[adventurer]]s loose on Yokyok, then turned his head into a nacho repository. Currently dead.
* '''Third Encounter'''
** Yukyuk. Yet another kobold: this one was dominated (the status effect, mind you) by V (who used him like a missile weapon to shoot up Zz'Dtri) and got used as a litter box ([[Sick| without being decapitated first!]]) and living trap-springer before dying in a horrific accident protecting a [[cat]].
* '''Fourth Encounter'''
* The fourth encounter with the Linear Guild included Tarquin and Malack (as below). It also involved Chancellor Kilkil (Urd, a Kobold variant... with wings! It's in the 2nd ed MM), who is more a clerk and personal assistant than a combatant, though he is a hyper-competent bureaucrat and a flying calculator.
** General Tarquin, a human [[warlord]], general of the Empress of Blood and de facto ruler of the Empire of Blood. Despite the suggestion of him being aligned to [[Khorne]] this is far from the truth: he is a friendly and cheerful person like his son Elan, but at the same time is outright ruthless and has the evil smarts like his other son, Nale. He is the ultimate in [[Alignment|Lawful Evil]]: he understands that his rule is not eternal, but his legacy can be. As such he is forging an entire continent into his empire: even when he is defeated (which he holds as being inevitable) he gets to be a legend. Though he's not very keen on the "being stabbed by a hero" part, it would mean he gets to live like a god for who-knows-how-long, and only the last few minutes sucked. [http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0763.html The man himself explains it best.]  On the other hand, given his Lawful obsession with forcing the messy chaos of reality to conform to the outline of a neat little story, refusing to conform to the character archetype he expects you to fill (e.g. playing a [[bard]] when he thinks you're the protagonist) causes him to quickly fly into a fit of [[butthurt]] rage to put [[That Guy]] to shame and start [[railroading]].  On joining the Linear Guild he disguised himself as Thog.
** Minister Malack is a lizardfolk (possibly yuan-ti) cleric of Nergal and serves as adviser to the Empress of Blood and Tarquin. Is actually a [[vampire]] and has just turned Durkon into one. Like his former adventuring companion Tarquin, Malack is an affable and well-spoken person and is the heir to the Empire of Blood after Tarquin's death. When he does become the next Emperor he plans to [[Emperor|sacrifice a thousand people to his god per day]] [[grimdark|in rooms that serve as gas chambers/abattoirs, the sacrifices generated by a continent's worth of people living and dying for the glory of Nergal]] (although the writer later stated he means meat packing rooms as he plans to use the thousand sacrifices to feed to himself and his vampiric spawn, who'll be running the empire). Like I said, real nice guy. Has a beef with Nale for killing three of his "children", but set aside his grudge at Tarquin's behest. Even then he is a honorable person: when he promises not to kill someone despite it serving his goals, he does so.  A very different sort of Lawful Evil, but still fits. Perma-dead, having been killed by Nale with sunlight, which has a disintegration effect on vampires.