Editing Hassan (section)

===Crazy Hassan and the Tallarn Raiders===

From the moment his outriders voxed “xenos on the western ridge!” Captain Assam of the 405th Tallarn knew he was doomed. His desert raiders were desperately trying to return to the main force to warn about a Tau incursion coming from the west, but it seemed his message would die with him. The kroot packs, he could see them now, seemed endless while his own meager forces had taken substantial loses and most were afoot, having lost both their Chimeras and their hardly desert horses.

As he gazed at what he thought would be the final enemy he would fight for the Emperor, a thought struck him. Didn’t kroot usually have more pronounced beaks? They weren’t usually that shade of brown… where were their weapons? Come to think of it, why were they on all fours instead of in the vague upright position of their subhumanity? And… was that a human at their head?

A human it was, and Assam gave the order to hold fire, not wanting to kill what might be a desert nomad like himself with what was clearly not kroot. Or maybe they were kroot. In the fine details of the things they certainly had the appearances of many kroot Assam had seen, but in the major detail they were…

“Camels?”

“YES CAMELS! YOU WANT TRAVEL FAST, CRAAAAAAAAAAAZY HASSAN HAS CAMELS APLENTY! BIG CAMEL, SMALL CAMEL, SHORT CAMEL, TALL CAMEL CAMEL SPECIAL BRED FOR MOUNTAIN AND DESERT AND FOREST AND OCEAN! YOU WANT CAMEL TO TO SWIM? I CAN GIVE YOU CAMEL THAT FLY!”

“Now see here, what is the meaning of this, you are delaying a servant of the Emperor in his sacred-“

“YOU NEED GO FAST? I SELL YOU CAMELS! LOW LOW PRICES GUARANTEED, IF NOT SATISFIED, CASH BACK I GIVE!”

“You… want to sell us your-“

“DEAL! YOU HAVE CAMELS I HAVE SALE. AND REMEMBER, CRAAAAAAAAAAZY HASSAN HAS THE BEST CAMELS IN THE GALAXY. YOU NO LIKE, CASH BACK GUARANTEED!”

And with that the crazed loon ran off into the desert, never to be seen by Assam again. The Tallarns, unsure of what to make of this, mounted up and delivered their message.