Editing Tales from the Aprior Sector (section)

==Training Day==

''By [[User:Not LongPoster Again|Not LongPoster]].''

Kaptin Feegul generally liked his job.  Humies never seemed to grow big enough to fight properly, but until they did, he would stand between them and the big nasties of the universe, and this “Aprior Sector” never seemed short of big nasties – from buggy Tyranid boys, to metal Necron boys, to spiky Chaos boys, there was always plenty for an Ork to do.

Still, there were some unpleasant duties which every Warboss had to face, sooner or later, like Deff, and paying Teef to your Bigger Boss, and, most frustrating of all, breaking in the new Boys.  It seemed that, wherever his Shhh! went, there were more Orks willing to join him, and, somehow, he had to mold them to fit in.

And the most frustrating task of all was drilling.  Orks had genetic memories of how to fight and build, but they had no idea of how to move or sneak around – that had to be taught.

Feegul surveyed the assembled Boys; every one of them eager to fight, but without discip – dissap – doing what he told them, his force would be worse than useless.  “DETAIL!” he bellowed, “LEFT FACE!”  And sure enough, no two boys faced the same direction when they were done.  “NAW, YA GITZ – YER UVVER LEFT!”  That didn't help matters – Orks had no instinct for “left” and “right,” it seemed, so he had to beat it into them.  This was complicated by the fact that, sometimes, he got them mixed up himself, which meant that some of his Boys knew them one way, and the others had them the other way, and all of them were firmly convinced that they were right.

Finally, in desperation, he howled, “DETAIL!  FACE DIS WAY!”  And, by Gork and Mork, they did!  They knew it – right out of the ground!  Feegul was overjoyed.  “DETAIL!  FACE DAT WAY!”  And they all turned back to face him – exactly the same angle and direction.  Indeed, if he were asked, he would be unable to define “dis way” and “dat way,” but he somehow knew which way they ought to go – and apparently, so did his Boys!  Of course, this raised the question of how he got them turned around.  Perhaps...“DETAIL!  FACE DA UVVER WAY!”  Sure enough, he found himself facing three dozen Ork backsides.

Perhaps training the new Boys would be more enjoyable from now on.